[Asher]

It feels so weird to be saying/doing this at almost 37 weeks and honestly not even sure anyone else would take me at this point.

Basically, it's a practice of three midwives that I don't feel are on the page with each other at all. I tell one something that the other told me or did (b/c it's pertinent to the situation) and they look at me crazy and ask where I heard/got that from.

: I don't think at least one of them even reads my chart before talking to me (which is not real helpful for the blood pressure, having to rehash the entire going ons for her).

And then just this whole entire mess. They won't label me pre-e, but putting me on bedrest for pre-e. They tell me what signs/symptoms to look for, but when I report anything that they've told me to look for, it gets blown off. I drive 40m or so each way 2-3 times a week for nst's, then ultrasound and nst's, then prenatal b/c they cannot fit me in for them on those same days any more b/c it's getting toward the end and their calender is full.

So 3x a week.

Basically, I need to know today WHAT is going on with me. I need answers and a plan/goal. (I know some of this will depend on my BPP tomorrow.) If this is serious enough for me to continue on bedrest and 2-3 appointments a week at the hospital, then is it serious enough for babe and I that he come out? If it's NOT serious enough, then I want to scale my appointments back to 1 day a week i.e one day for the ultrasound, a nst and a prenatal.

Maybe this is being pushy and asking a lot, but honestly, I feel like one hand isn't telling the other what it's doing and I feel like I, as the patient, really don't have a clue what is going on with my body and baby. And just when I think I do, I see another midwife and get told something else entirely. I'm just frustrated, anxious, scared, irritated, sad...you name it, I've probably gone through the emotion.

I just want answers and a plan of action. Is that too much to expect?

 

[Ldavis24]

It is not too much to expect and you have every right to be annoyed and concerned!

Tell them in plain english and you can only hope that they will get it, otherwise maybe a switch, if that is even possible really is best for you...

I don't think any woman should feel in the dark about whats going on with her body and baby, especially this late in a pregnancy!

 

[mamayarn]

Of course it's not too much to expect.

Just tell them what you wrote here. Nicely.

You have valid concerns and it sounds like they really need to get on the same page. I would leave out the "or else" though for now and see what they do.

 

[Asher]

Yeah, I won't be saying anything about leaving the practice today.

I told DH I hate being confrontational and don't know if I can do this. He sad just pretend it's his mom.

I said in that case, I'm not going!

 

[lotus.blossom]

Good for you! I'm annoyed for you about all this hassle. Following your story these last few weeks, it seems like things are way up in the air. You don't deserve the run around! Seems like something that a doctor would do not a trio of midwives.

:

 

[CookAMH]

I don't think it's unreasonable at all to ask for the appts to be all on the same day. That way you can rest more if they really want you to rest!

Let us know how it goes. I don't have any experience to pass on but I know others do!

 

[~Katie~]

I think you are absolutely justified in telling them everything you've said here. You deserve to be respected and taken seriously as a client, and as a practice they need to be on the same page. I'm hoping they are receptive to you and wise up after this, they need to realize that inconsistency causes patients to end up slipping through the cracks when their attention is needed the most.

 

[Asher]

Well, a non-update kinda update.

I got 5 minutes down the road from my house and the receptionist called to ask if I could come later today as one of the midwives (my fav.) is on vaca this week and the one that was supposed to see me (that I don't care for and doesn't read my chart) needed to run rounds at the hospital. The only time they had today was right when I'd need to be here to get my kids from school so I asked if she'd had any cancellations for tomorrow. YES and between my AFI/BPP and my NST SO I'll be able to go in tomorrow with a lot more knowledge of what is going on with baby and we can go from there. PLUS I won't have to waste 4 hours in the city finding stuff to occupy us until the NST.

So I do still plan to talk things through tomorrow, but I feel like I'll have a little more knowledge at that time of what's going on so that we can make a plan. The u/s techs there will tell me his growth, the AFI levels and how he is doing so I'll know all of that before my prenatal and will have some clue what needs to be done.

PLUS I don't have to waste time and gas driving up two days in a row! WOOT!

 

[JD5351]

That's awesome!

I definately would discuss all of the issues tomorrow. I would mention that they waited until the last minute to reschedule your appointment also--Even though it IS more convenient to you, they need to be more organized--including staying up to date in your chart and keeping eachother in the loop.

Enjoy your free time today.

 

[RasJane]

I would absolutely give them an ultimatum! They have been downright ridiculous, it seems to me. Most mw practices have weekly staff meetings where they go over everyone's clients, concerns, upcoming issues and whatnot. Charts are reviewed, input is asked for. I can't believe yours don't do this!
And driving all that way several times a week when you are supposed to be resting is crazy.
Do you have an idea of what you will do if they brush you off? Basically, what is your backup plan?
I'm glad tomorrow works out better for you. Good luck mama!

 

[j_p_i]

Absolutely discuss your concerns and be very frank with them. You deserve to know what's going on and there's no reason for them all to be on different pages.

I hate confrontation too, but I think you can definitely discuss this with them without being too confrontational. I'd think they would understand. If not - then I would definitely have a back-up plan... have you called around to other places to see if they would take you on? You'd need a copy of your records for them to look at, and they might be hesitant if you've had issues during the pregnancy. I was worried about this when I had to switch practices at 32 weeks, I can't imagine dealing with what you are!

Honestly just talk to the mws and let them know your issues, fears, etc. I hope they'll be receptive so you don't have to consider what else to do!

 

[kdtmom2be]

Glad your appointments are working out better for tomorrow, I have a similar problem here in that the midwives want to see me on Mondays, the chiro on Tuesdays and they are across the street from each other and FAR from my house! What a pain. Luckily one of MY clients is out that way on Tues so at least I can sorta schedule things together on that day.

And no, you are totally not being unreasonable. The midwives should have thier acts together a little better. There are four in the practice that I use, plus a student and thier biggest screw-up so far in TWO pregnancies is using the doppler when my chart clearly states that we use the fetoscope instead. My MIL was there with me and I didn't speak up, figuring she'd like to be able to hear too, so no biggie. It's not right that you have to re-iterate all the details of your chart to each midwife at every appointment. If they are too buy to read your chart then they should have taken on less patients for this time frame.

 

[Asher]

Yes, the midwife that I had with my first three kids is somewhat closer (about 20m away) and I'm pretty sure she'd take me. She's in a practice of OB's, but if I'm going to end up induced for medical issues, anyway, I'm not sure it matters since with the pregnancy between my two girls, I went to her and she did say if I was concerned, she could just set a date to induce me. Normally I cringe at that, but it's going to come to that, anyway here for medical reasons, I think so I'm not sure it makes a difference. That pregnancy ended in a miscarriage, but I looked on-line today and she is still with the practice. She knows my history with my first three and delivered two of them so I *think* she'd pull some strings to get me in.

But truly, even if not and I have to just wait and go in labor and walk in to a hospital somewhere, I don't think they'd turn me away in labor. Not ideal, but if I cannot get things settled here and cannot find anyone else to take me, I will consider it. (I have asked a friend who got induced with pre-e at 38 weeks about her dr., too so am waiting to hear back.)

 

[lil_miss_understood]

I'm subbing so I don't miss out on the conclusion.
I hope you find a satisfactory solution.

 

[mamayarn]

Quote:

Originally Posted by JacquelineR I'm subbing so I don't miss out on the conclusion. I hope you find a satisfactory solution.

Yeah... I'm subbing too.

 

[Kelly1101]

totally justified... you've been thru so much... hoping for a good update

 

[cmoma]

I hope you get it all figured out tomorrow, it seems like an awful lot of extra stress which you don't need at all.

 

[Asher]

We had our bio physical profile today. G scored a 8 out of 8! He was "breathing" the entire time which was really neat and encouraging to see. (I have never had an ultrasound this late in pregnancy.) Still heads down, still very much a boy ;-) (we haven't been able to see this since our 20 week u/s due to his positioning), fluid level is up to 10 which is great and normal. ALL looked good!

So headed to my midwife appt. and the only midwife there that had seen me had to leave for a birth! So I did a quick check up with the professional nurse midwife, but didn't get to talk to her about what the plan is now, didn't get to go over my birth plan, didn't really get to talk much at. all. other than quick heartbeat, fundal height, etc. Basically a non-appointment. Glad I was already up there or I'd have been really peeeved. She did talk quickly to my other midwife before she left for the birth and she's going to call me later about cancelling all of these extra appointments since G is doing so well. WOOT! Blood pressure was 122/83 so "normal" (diastolic still high for me, but in the normal range for most people) so they didn't do any bloodwork.

On the bad side, now I'm thinking "Oh great! Five more weeks of pregnancy!" hehe Here's hoping he's not that late like some of his siblings were!!!

I had a NST scheduled at 1, but was up most of the night with a feverish toddler so I called and cancelled it. I figured the BPP was good enough today, anyway and he's moving just fine plus we heard the hb again at the prenatal so a NST seemed like overkill on top of all of that.

OH! And I got the schedule for May and the midwife that I don't feel bonded with at all and that I don't think looks at my chart is not on call at. all. for the month of May.

:

 

[SunCB]

Glad to hear your 1st appt went so well and things are looking good. Sorry to hear you were not able to talk to them like you wanted.

 

[RasJane]

That's fantastic that that mw isn't on call in May! And Yay

: for such a good report on G!
I hope this means you are able to relax a bit more.
In doing my research on IUGR, I noticed that the tests you are going through are the same ones they use to monitor that + pre-e. So I wonder if they are worried about that, just not telling you?
And how's the toddler? I hate it when they are sick, it makes me feel so bad since they can't understand why they feel that way. Plus I hate being up at night--especially this preggo!