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I'd like to know as well. If I spent that long just getting her down for a nap I think I would say forget it you'll sleep at some point. I thought 50 mins to go down was long! But, they mainly is because she comfort nurses for that long.
 

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Put baby in crib, give pacifier, lovey and blankie, turn on mobile. Baby's eyes start to close. I sneak out of room. Five seconds later baby cries. Go back into room. Baby standing up throwing lovey on the floor. Lay back down, replace paci, lovey and blankie. Reset mobile. Watch baby's eyes close. Leave room. Baby cries again.

Repeat. Many times.

Finally get frustrated, go in and get baby out of crib. Bring to living room to play. Baby tired, cranky and miserable. Return baby to crib and repeat above routine. Many times.

Get baby out of crib again. Feed baby. Baby still miserable and whiney. Return to crib. Repeat routine. Many times.

Notice baby now has a distinct odour. Take baby out of crib. Change diaper. Return to crib. Repeat routine. Many times.

After two hours baby finally falls asleep.

That was my morning. My babe has started pulling herself up to stand in the last couple of weeks, and thinks it is way more important to do that than actually sleep. She also will not fall asleep in arms, or in a carrier, and will only occasionally fall asleep in a stroller if she is very, very tired. She will sleep in the car but wakes up the instant we turn it off.

Some times she goes right to sleep with no issues, other times it takes many tries. If she gets up and is happy I have no problems letting her delay sleep, but there are times that she is so tired and whiney and miserable I know she needs a nap. If she gets over tired it is even harder to get her to finally give in to sleep.

If your kid goes down without a fuss, good for you. But please don't pass some kind of judgement on mamas that have to work harder (and longer!) for the same result.
 

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I don't want you to think that I was passing judgement. That wasn't my intent at all. If that it is how it seemed then I am very sorry.

DD is only 4 months so when she is older we might go through that. I hope not. If you lay down with her will she sleep?
 

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With ds1, I would sometimes spend that long nursing/rocking him to sleep. It was never less than 45 minutes. But we all suffered later if he didn't sleep.

DS2 is either much better at getting to sleep, or it's just not an option to devote that kind of quiet time. I'll nurse him, but if he doesn't want to go to sleep, so be it. As a result, I have very little choice about when he sleeps, and I can't always work around it. Yesterday we were busy all day, so he catnapped in the car, then went to bed early, slept poorly, and woke up too early today. We all just do the best we can as we go.
 

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(a) The parents, either due to their own schedule or due to an idea that it is necessary, are trying to stick to a sleep schedule, or
(b) The child is of the type that will get dead tired, screaming, crying, inconsolable tired, but Just. Won't. Sleep., or
(c) The parents are taking "go down" for a nap literally, and the child will only sleep in arms.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by jt'smum View Post
DD is only 4 months so when she is older we might go through that. I hope not. If you lay down with her will she sleep?
Sometimes. Sometimes not. But I run a home daycare, so don't really have that luxury.

Sorry if I came accross curt. When she really resists sleep I end up quite frustrated. I told her several times this morning that I was going to give her to the neighbours.
 

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DD isn't a great napper everyday. Today she was up at 6, down for 45 min at 8ish, up and now down in swing. Some days her naps happen when I pick her sis up from school. If that happens I let her stay in her car seat.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by birdie22 View Post
With ds1, I would sometimes spend that long nursing/rocking him to sleep. But we all suffered later if he didn't sleep.
same here. he will be clearly tired.. yawning, rubbing eyes, extremely fussy. but fights sleep really bad. its never taken me *hours* to get him to sleep, but 45 minutes-hour of rocking/nursing or laying down nursing- yes.

I have never been able to put him in his crib and have him fall asleep on his own, though.
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Liquesce View Post
(a) The parents, either due to their own schedule or due to an idea that it is necessary, are trying to stick to a sleep schedule, or
(b) The child is of the type that will get dead tired, screaming, crying, inconsolable tired, but Just. Won't. Sleep., or
(c) The parents are taking "go down" for a nap literally, and the child will only sleep in arms.
a. But if it takes a varying amount of time for them to get to sleep, can it really be called a "schedule"?

b. See now, I wouldn't think of that as getting them down for a nap, I'd think of that as dealing with crankiness for a couple hours and then they finally go to sleep. Is it tied in a bit to a.?

c. People do that to themselves? Wait, is this part of that whole "lay them down sleepy" thing?

Okay, I just haven't dealt with any of that because I'm too lazy to do all that work.
 

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During the times that I co-slept for naps, he'd fall asleep nursing (and so would I). But for the times that I didn't want to nap at the same time, since he took 5 naps a day, I had to nurse/rock/shush for about an hour for him to be asleep enough to not wake up again when I put him down in the crib or got up from the bed (very gently, without ANY jostling!). Then he would only sleep for 30 minutes. Gah!

I always envied those moms who said they could put their newborn down and have them fall asleep right away. What's that like?
 

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A somewhat unsuccessful schedule with a mind towards creating a routine that will work in the long run, then.


I've done C, myself, when for the sake of something I needed to do or just for the sake of my own sanity I really needed to put the baby down for a little while, albeit not 2-3 hours worth of trying to get them down for a nap. Taking a little time to put a baby to sleep on their own is better for me than being an unwashed, unfed going crazy woman. But yeah ... some people do think you need to teach a baby to sleep on their own for the child's own good.
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
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Originally Posted by Liquesce View Post
Taking a little time to put a baby to sleep on their own is better for me than being an unwashed, unfed going crazy woman.
If it's clear Lina's not going to nurse to sleep readily and I have something I need to do I just get up and do it while carrying her. (
: for when she'll sit and play while I work.) Then, too, she adores showering with me so that's lucky.
 

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I don't think DD has ever gone down for a nap awake. If she wakes when I lay her down she looks at me like I am crazy and then fusses. So I nurse her more and try again. as far as doing something she hangs in her sling,bumbo or floor. She will sit in bumbo and watch me shower.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan View Post
If it's clear Lina's not going to nurse to sleep readily and I have something I need to do I just get up and do it while carrying her. (
: for when she'll sit and play while I work.) Then, too, she adores showering with me so that's lucky.
I have really, really easy kids overall, but my daughter will NOT nap in a sling and will scream bloody murder if I try to take her into a shower. I can and do handle a lot of things with only one hand free, but there are days I just need a shampooing and a sandwich without a struggle, and the sleep struggle is worth it to get them.
 

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This question makes me laugh because just a few weeks, I didn't know what that meant either! But I do now... UGH!

Quote:

Originally Posted by jt'smum View Post
I'd like to know as well. If I spent that long just getting her down for a nap I think I would say forget it you'll sleep at some point. I thought 50 mins to go down was long! But, they mainly is because she comfort nurses for that long.
Jt'smum, I could have written your post!
I thought I was doing the "forget it" thing, but now realize it really is a whole process because of all the fussiness and crying that results until there is finally sleep. I sure hope we are in a phase! lol
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by jt'smum View Post
I don't think DD has ever gone down for a nap awake. If she wakes when I lay her down she looks at me like I am crazy and then fusses.
Haha! Yes, I know this look, my daughter also gives it to me... and then her lower lip starts to jut out, and her brow furrows, and if I don't pick her up she'll start to wail. If I'm lying down with her and she wakes up, she'll want to play -- until she realizes she's tired.

She's like her daddy: a little bit of overtiredness means a lot of crankiness. So that's why it can sometimes take hours for me to get her to settle into a nap. She'll fall asleep against me but it's a very light sleep, and I'll hold her for another 10-15 minutes to try and get her into the deep sleep. But if she doesn't wake up when I move, she's likely to wake up when I lay her down. For example, today we've been doing this dance since 11am and she just went down for a nap at 2pm. I sat on the edge of the bed with her for 5 minutes after she fell asleep, came out into the living room, and it's been another 15 minutes that she's still been asleep. Usually if she's down for 20m without waking up, she'll be out for at least an hour, so I'm feeling good right now, like I can go hop in the shower or make lunch for myself and not have to worry much about her waking up
 

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I guess we do have a process. I never really thought of it that way. It does take us awhile to get down for a nap. Today she hasn't slept much and is now nursing in the sling. I thought she was asleep and went to lay her down and she howled. So it looks like nap will come via the car today. And the playing thing that is new with us. She will nurse and then pop off and start talking to me and laughing and smiling. I try to just look at her and say nothing. Yeah that doesn't work I end up talking and engaging her and we go back and forth like this till I sling her and continue on.
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Liquesce View Post
I have really, really easy kids overall, but my daughter will NOT nap in a sling
Oh, I didn't mean have her nap in a sling, I meant hoist her onto my hip with my left arm and make myself lunch with my right. It's awesome when she's willing to slip into the sling so I can use both hands and prep stuff that needs cutting, but on fussy days I have a lot of scrambled eggs, microwaved oatmeal, whole fruit, frozen pre-chopped veggies--that sort of stuff. Convenience foods.


She isn't necessarily calm while I make myself food, but she isn't any more fussy than she was when I was trying to nurse her to sleep and sometimes watching me make lunch distracts her from her crankiness.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Liquesce View Post
(a) The parents, either due to their own schedule or due to an idea that it is necessary, are trying to stick to a sleep schedule, or
(b) The child is of the type that will get dead tired, screaming, crying, inconsolable tired, but Just. Won't. Sleep., or
(c) The parents are taking "go down" for a nap literally, and the child will only sleep in arms.
It's b and c here. Whew. And now I'M tired.
 
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