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Discussion Starter #1
I love my 2 1/2 yo son and I'm very deeply thankful for being his Mama, but he drives me crazy. It doesn't help that he was born on the night of a Full Moon and his moods and teething are really magnified during the crazy phase. When I need to change his diaper, he squirms and tries to pull my hands away and plays with me and when my dear sweet husband helps me change his diaper, he's not happy until he has all his favorite toys close to him. He's quite the handful and can be very willful. He's a beautiful adorable little boy and we make each other laugh and smile, but I feel overwhelmed and stressed and tired and I really wish we had like minded dear friends who live nearby for friendship and support so we can help each other. It would just be so nice and would help me feel better to have a sweet caring mature Mama friend with her little 1 to talk to, hug, laugh, and soothe each other when we're feeling stressed. I really need my sister tribe. I posted in the forum on mothering and I only received 2 responses...unfortunately from a few Mamas who love coffee and I mean no offense to anyone, I mean no harm, but I am not a coffee drinker and I feel more comfortable with Mamas who meditate and drink Raja's Cup or Cafix instead...it's unhealthy for me and I feel more comfortable with Mamas who are calm and alert and meditative. I would love to hear from like minded Mamas and I'd love to connect with you and maybe even chat a little. Thank you.
 

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sister tribe. I posted in the forum on mothering and I only received 2 responses...unfortunately from a few Mamas who love coffee and I mean no offense to anyone, I mean no harm, but I am not a coffee drinker and I feel more comfortable with Mamas who meditate and drink Raja's Cup or Cafix instead...it's unhealthy for me and I feel more comfortable with Mamas who are calm and alert and meditative. I would love to hear from like minded Mamas and I'd love to connect with you and maybe even chat a little. Thank you.
I would try to meet with them. It they might surprise you. You never know you might find a good friend...
 

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I agree.
You could also look into groups like Holistic Mothers Network, Le Leche League or similar, search online for
Local chapters.
There are many playgroups too that have websites on Yahoo groups or Facebook. Search for naturally minded, crunchy, or whatever term might apply. The groups in your area should pop up then list events.
 

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Is "drink coffee" a euphemism for something I don't know about? Like, "drank the koolaid?" Otherwise, I'm not sure how that would be a friendship ruiner. I've made lots of long-distance and one nearby friend through mothering and they are all so lovely in different ways. Most of them, plus most of my in-person friends, drink coffee, and it means nothing. Judging people for their personal choices is a tough way to start a friendship. I kind of get the sense that what you are trying to say is something entirely different from consumption habits though, and I think I hear you.

I've just made the first female friend in many many years who I can hug and hold on to and feel cared about with. I was very lonely since moving away from my childhood best friend and making only shallow bonds since. I think it's rare to find that in an individualistic society, but it can't start by ruling out people just because they are different. Think of it this way: you are feeling desperate and lonely. Maybe meditation helps, but it's obviously no substitute for a good friend. For another woman, maybe the long-lived traditional ritual of a coffee or tea helps, but is also no substitute for a friend!


Me and my new friend? We are SO different at face value. If we had decided to meet based on our laundry list of traits we never would have been friends. There are so many things that would have been alarm bells! I have hairy armpits! She wears a 2 carat diamond ring! I am of mixed race and progressive politically! She is white and fairly conservative! But we both: love our babies closely and dearly, have families we need to tread lightly around, have husbands we love but wish we could educate along with ourselves as we change and grow as returning students. We both balance childcare and our own continuing education. We both love to dance and be expressive. We both love to tell stories and talk. We both look at a room of people and immediately know who needs to be nurtured and seek them out. This time, it just happened to be each other!!

I've been waiting for this friend a long time. There's no WAY I'd let something like her eating habits or our political disagreements keep me from loving her!
 

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^^yes this!! Well said...& I wanted to add that I too have friends who seem nothing like me at first glance--but, thankfully they gave me a chance & I've found some wonderful love and support from people who get how tough this Mom thing is!
 

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Just getting out there and connecting with people could lead you in the right direction, even if it doesn't end up being a true friendship. Those mammas might have mamma friends that are more your type.
 

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Plus, living in rural Oregon, you can't be too choosy, or you will burn through all your options.

Most of my friends are profoundly different in me in some key ways--politics, level of crunch, income, race, religion/lack thereof, education levels, etc.

Actually, I kinda prefer it that way...keeps things interesting.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
I'm not feeling well today, so I will try to keep this brief, but I'd like to respond to a few thoughts that were shared. I understand what you are saying and true, but as for the coffee issue...it is my preference because caffeine tends to make people hyper and people who meditate don't drink coffee and they are very calm. I'm happy to meet people from all walks of life, but I prefer and feel comfortable with Mamas who are health, like minded with whom we can relate and connect and understand each other. I live and let live and I respect all walks of life.
 
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