[christinelin]

I am attempting the NCSS (Elizabeth Pantley's book) with my 13-month-old son and I would love some advice and support.

DS co-sleeps and does okay in the middle of the night (or I sleep through it all, anyway). Our problem is bedtime. He had been waking every 15-45 minutes to be resettled. I started trying to not nurse him all the way to sleep about two weeks ago. The first couple of nights were quite difficult. He cried some, basically from being overtired and I ended up nursing him down. The fourth night he fell asleep on his own after two hours of trying (he is basically nursing on and off and crawling around on the bed trying to get settled). Since then he has mostly been able to get settled and fall asleep without nursing all the way down in about an hour. The great news is that he's been sleeping a 2 hour stretch at the start of the night.

Tonight, though, he again took two hours to fall asleep and spent much of the second hour crying in my arms. He seemed unwilling to nurse completely to sleep (which I am always willing to do if it's just too much for him), but also unable to settled without nursing. He did finally fall asleep, but I am discouraged and concerned about the impact this is having on him.

Has anyone else tried this method? Any ideas?

Thanks, Christine

 

[Colorful~Mama]

well, my son is just turning 11mos old but was waking every 45minutes to 2 hours all night for the past month. No changes in diet, no teeth in site. I watch other children during the day and have a preschooler so i've been fried. One night two weeks ago he woke 8 times from 9pm-6 am when we got up for the day.

i read ncss and i also have read a bit of dr.jay gordons 'changing the sleep pattern in the family bed' and we're doing a modified combination of both.

We've really worked hard on naps. he's gone from no naps or cat naps to a 45 minute morning nap . in the afternoon he nurses down for an hour, wakes and then i nurse him back down for another hour and a half! this is huge for us.

at night i nurse to sleep and he usually goes down within 30 minutes but wakes after another half hour and i nurse back down. But i do wait til he's almost asleep but not quite and unlatch him, help him roll onto his side and then i do the backpatting, keywords till he's out. I'm still nursing thru the night but i stay awake instead of falling back asleep and leaving him latched on for an hour (blushing). So i unlatch after a few minutes and try the pull off/roll over/ pat pat/keywords like in ncss and dr.gordon.

I'm finding its taking way longer then either of them suggest and thats ok. We're on the fifth night and he's sleeping about 3.5hours, nurse/pat then 2 hours sleep, nurse/pat, then 3 hours nurse/pat then 2 hours and we're up for the day. Not enough sleep for him or me. Last night he did better tho , he went to sleep at 9:30 and woke at 1:30 (a four hour block. its a miracle), 4:30 and for the day at 6:30 - so it was 4 hours, 3 hours, 2 hours... much better.

tonight he went down at 8:45 but woke at 9:30 to nurse till 9:40. He's out now so i'm guessing he'll wake at around 1am, 4am and for the day at 6 = but am HOPING for 1am and 6am. LOL . When he does wake at 1 I'll try the short nursing, pop off, roll over, keywords, back pat. He wont seem to take a transitional object.

anyway, i'm rambling. My son is really quite young to be trying it with so i know i'm in for longer then a few weeks and it might take a few months, but i'm here with you if you want to talk.

 

[christinelin]

My little guy has never napped with any consistency for longer than 45 minutes. I have just moved him to one nap a day, which makes it easier for me to attempt to resttle him mid-nap to get a total of 1 1/2 hours of sleep (I also have a 4 yo who needs attention).

It's good to hear that others find it challenging. The books always make it sound so easy...

Christine

 

[Feathere]

Hi Mamas,
I did the NCSS w/ dd. We started at around 11 months and now at 14 months she still wakes up once or (occasionally) twice, and I am pretty ok w/that. I read NCSS several times and at first it comes across as fiction! I also read and tried w/ no success the dr jay gordon suggestions--that lead to terrible crying, and i could not bear that. What I found w/ NCSS is that it takes a lot longer that I expected, I tend to forget the 'pop off' if I am really tired, which makes things harder, and some of the waking just improves with time. I did the suggestion of writing the book about sleep for dd, and I think it helps, and I also tightened the bedtime ritual of bath/book/nurse, and that seems to have helped.

If you are trying things that don't feel right with your child, stop for a while. If you are so exhausted that you are frustrated, maybe try to enlist someone else's help, or try putting him to bed earlier, when you have more energy. YOu might also try explaining in really simple language your expectations for the night. I am a big believer in the power of positive thinking, and I told dd repeatedly that she could sleep all night. Honestly, it seemed to help! (Maybe it just made me feel better, who knows!)

It took a couple months before I saw an improvement in the sleep behaviors. So hang in there, and know you are not alone!

 

[havilah]

Count me in! DS is 8 months old, and was waking around 9 times a night when I kept our first nighttime journal (5.5 mos). Bad, bad, bad. I started doing the GR (when I was awake to remember to do it

), but really didn't commit to the plan other than that.

Last week DH and I decided to commit to working with him for at least a month, and see what happens. Now my primary motivation isn't nightweaning, as he is only 8 months, but a consistent bedtime that doesn't involve hours of meltdown and hoop-jumping. It would be **heaven** to know that bedtime comes at 8:00 (or so...), and then DH and I will have a couple hours to reconnect.

Plus, James hasn't really seemed to be well rested recently. He'll be content and happy for an hour or so, then he'll start to rub his eyes, take a catnap, be up for 30 minutes and seem sleepy again. It's like we are in this cycle of brief naps that take the edge off his fatigue, but don't really refresh him.

So far we are 4 days into a consistent bedtime routine that starts at 7pm sharp. The first two nights he was asleep by 8pm, the 3rd at 8:30, and last night was 8:15. He is staying asleep (mostly) until we join him between 10 and 11

At night I'm trying to be consistent with key words and GR. That goes okay until about 4:30, then he just dozes and roots until 7:00. Not sure how to fix this

:

I haven't done much in the way of nap routine, as I got really frustrated and confused last time I tried. I'm just trying to help him sleep as much as possible... whatever it takes.

I'd love to have a few travelling partners on this journey!

 

[be11ydancer]

I just started reading NCSS for the second time and started a bedtime routine just tonight. We did a bath at 7:30, read three books, sang a lullaby, and then nursed for a longggg time. She was down at around 8:30. Then she got up at 9:00 really cranky and I had to nurse her for like 45 min to get her back to sleep. She kept fighting it but finally gave in. I could tell that she was really drowsy even though she kept trying to climb out of my arms. I should also mention that she has a usual bedtime of around 10pm, and has NEVER gone to bed that early before tonight. We will stick with this routine for a while and see how it goes. If I don't see results in two weeks or so, I will probably just give in to the three or so night feedings she gets. (She is 11 months old, BTW.) So wish us luck tonight!

And good luck to everyone else trying NCSS!

Melissa