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So, we live at a camp... camp is gearing up and that is great... but one thing I always fear is the possibility that one of our campers (from varying backgrounds... some from difficult places) might sexually abuse one of our children... or even one of the adult or college aged staff... though I think this less likely.<br><br>
That said, I try very very hard to never let our children out of my sight... as I know my presence is one of the biggest deterants to people like that... you know a mama bears cubs really have nothing to fear... but it does happen from time to time that she is playing with out my supervision or goes with another adult I trust to help with a chore or something like that.<br><br>
So, I've been thinking about talking to my dd... who just turned 5... she is a clever girl and much to her benefit strong minded... We've talked to her about what to do if some one trys to take her... and I have a lot of faith she would pitch a fit to equal anyone who might try... but she admires our staff and campers and I am not sure she'd know what to do if someone would approach her in that manner.<br><br>
So, what should I tell her?<br>
We've only talked about birth and how babies exit their mother... not how they get there or what s*x is...<br><br>
How to I explain the horrid truth with out ruining her purity or scaring her???
 

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We have already begun talking about "good touch" and "bad touch" with our ds1, who is almost 3.5. We told him nobody should touch his "privacy" (family word for genitals) expcept for mama, daddy, and doctor. He is potty trained so there really is no reason. We also said he shouldn't touch anyone else's and if someone tried either of the above, he needs to tell an adult. We talk about this fairly often because he has a habit of taking off his underpants and putting his penis on things (lol, I know) and we just use it in the context of appropriate behavior.
 

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Have you read <span style="text-decoration:underline;">Protecting the Gift</span> by Gavin deBecker? He has a lot of good information about this kind of stuff.
 

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I'll second what phathui said! I just bought it used off of amazon and it is full of great tips. Keeping your child in the dark about these things is not a way to help them. I have a 3 yo and I don't want to overwhelm her, but I've tried talking with her more and more about personal safety. If children see you be quiet and secretive about "the horrid truth and s*x" then chances are they will mirror this behaviour when someone unsavory approaches them about it and explains it to them! The book encourages parents to be proactive- you teach them what they need to know to stay safe so a stranger can't take advantage of their ignorance!
 

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I third "Protecting the Gift" -- what you need to do is to teach your daughter to trust her own gut. She's old enough to understand what 'uncomfortable' means, and I would teach her:<br><br>
-If someone makes you feel uncomfortable inside, it's OK to tell them 'no' and to not be with them. It's OK to not be polite.<br>
-No one should ever touch you or ask you to touch them where a bathing suit covers. If they do, tell them 'no', and tell your mom or dad.<br>
-It's not your fault if someone makes you uncomfortable.<br><br>
Given your living situation, I would see if you could make a blanket rule that your children are never to be alone with one adult or teen unless that adult is one of their parents. So, if your daughter is with other campers, there needs to be more than one. If your daughter is with other staff, there needs to be more than one person there. That's not a complete and total safeguard, but it will help. Many, many volunteer organizations have similar rules.
 
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