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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
DS is 13.5 months old and starting to put the concepts of body parts and functions together - especially nursing and going potty - which we think is wonderful! But it is leading to some rather embarassing moments lately.

DS has been pulling down or pulling up my shirt for a while now - or sticking his hand down and trying to pull my breast out of the bra and up out of the shirt - I gently tell him it isn't nice to pull on mama's shirt, distract him for a moment, and then nurse him. The behavior got better but hasn't gone away - but lately he is doing it (and worse!) to other people.

At first it was just DH - he would pull down DH's shirt and reach down inside - especially if he needed to nurse. But then it suddenly started to become a game for him, and he has started to "tweak" DH's nipples and giggle hysterically.

Lately, anytime any female holds him - he pulls down her shirt and either looks down it, tries to stick his head down in it, or slides his hand down into her shirt to touch her bra or breast. I am just waiting for him to try tweaking someone! It has already led to many awkward moments over the last few weeks!

It is kinda cute - but at the same time, I don't want him to think that it is okay to disrobe or molest people. Yesterday at the chiropractor's office he molested the receptionist and basically flashed her to a office full of people!! She was mortified and I was SO embarassed.

I wasn't expecting this kind of behavior until he was a bit older - at 13 mo he understands quite a bit, but doesn't have much expressive language except gestures, actions, etc.

How can I gently teach him to respect other people's bodies?? Right now, we are just removing him, telling him it isn't nice, etc. But he is persistent and at times he thinks it is a game.....

Any advice????
 

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Try teaching your son a sign for nursing. Now my son will sign before he goes for the goods, so to speak and gives me some warning that he is ready. We implimented it around 11 mo as a first step in 'manners'. It took him around a week to learn to use the sign.
 

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i dont mean to laugh, but your post was too funny. I agree with above, the signing does seem to work, all my nieces and nephew have responded to it, and I am working on it with DD now. It just takes time.

DD is just 9 months, and she has started the same kind of thing. All DH says is "what kind of table manners are those" But it sounds like your doing a wonderful job
Keep up the good work!!!
 

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We used the sign to great success too. Around 18 months or so, DS took to shouting "BOOB" in his loudest voice when he wanted to nurse. At LLL one day the leader said, it's sort of cute now, but as he gets closer to 2 it will start to get embarassing. She was right, but we couldn't get him to go back to the sign. So I made him say "nurse" when he wanted to nurse and wouldn't give him what he wanted until he said it. It only took him less than a week to figure out he needed to ask politely to get what he wanted. Of course, it took longer than that to retrain the rest of the family to say " I think he wants to nurse" instead of "he wants a boob".
 

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I agree that a sign would definitely help, along with lots of redirection. I know that one reason DS and I have nursed so long and in reasonable peace is my dogged insistance on nursing manners.

It does my little heart good to hear him say "Mama, I need nurse now pwease!" and the "thank you mama for nursin'!" It's a lovely thign to hear, and extends my patience by miles and miles.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thanks!
We have always tried to use "nurse" when we talk to DS about it. I figured it would be easier later on since we plan to extended nurse.
It is encouraging to know that I am atleast on the right track with the redirection - it just doesn't seem to be working, and I am getting a bit frustrated with teh lack of results. I know it is probably just toddlerhood rearing its ugly head. LOL

What is the sign for Nursing??

And should I start insisting that he use the sign or other polite indication before I allow him to nurse (after he masters it of course!)??
I doon't want to deny him a chance to nurse, but I want him to learn to be polite about it at the same time.....and leave poor innocent strangers fully clothed! LOL I swear I am just waiting for the dreaded day he not only pulls down a woman's shirt but reaches down and tweaks her nipple. I will crawl under a chari and day at that point. Man I wish my local LLL had evening meetings. - thanks for all the support and encouragement ladies!
 

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To make the sign for nurse, open and close your hand like you're milking a cow (it's actually the ASL for milk). Start making the sign whenever he's actually nursing. That's how my DS managed to figure out what it meant. Now he will often lie back and sign 'milk' with both hands while nursing.... he also uses it to ask for it too... (he's about the same age as your son).
 

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We encourage DD (15mo) to sign "milk", and she will also ask for "boom boom". But she does still pull at my shirt and try to pull it off now and then. I know that by this age she doesn't need the "instant access" of a younger child, and it's important to get those nursing manners firmly in place!

The Kellymom site has some great information on teaching nursing manners (http://www.kellymom.com/bf/older-bab...g-manners.html) and the LLL toddler tips page (http://www.lalecheleague.org/NB/NBtoddlertips.html) has some good stuff too!

Although DD hasn't tried to tweak or strip anyone else, she does point at DH's chest and say "boom-boom broke" before laughing hysterically. Which gets me laughing every single time!
 
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