[octobermom]

I'm trying to teach my DD to say may I.. instead of I want but shes having trouble getting it. I try to just give her the words.
ME: "say may I"
DD : May I
ME: have an apple
DD: want an apple

any clues on how I can help her, Oh BTW I don't think its a "discipline" thing her saying I want but I'll admit it grates on my nerves hearimg I want 3,000 times a day. (but I get thats my issue) however I do believe may I is better so I'm trying to model it.. Any ideas on what may of helped with yours..

Deanna

 

[captain crunchy]

Hiya. We aren't into the *may I* thing (but gee, would you expect that we would be

) but instead we model "I would like, would you like" -- to me it sounds more respectful than *I want* and not as (just my opinion) stuffy or whatever as *may I* --- so for anything we are giving/asking our daughter we say "would you like a _____?" instead of *do you want*.... with the idea that maybe she will say "I would like an apple" (or whatever) instead of I WANT....

I am guessing maybe it is not so much the words that may bother you but the tone of voice (demanding, not respectful etc)? ... I could be wrong, maybe it is the word

Maybe that would be a compromise that will be easier for her to do and easier on you too?

 

[frontierpsych]

I say "can I"... my poor kids are gonna grow up being hounded by grammar freaks.

 

[octobermom]

Quote:

Originally Posted by frontierpsych I say "can I"... my poor kids are gonna grow up being hounded by grammar freaks.

Yea my mother was an English teacher ( I obviously recieved none of her spelling genes)

SO hearing Can I makes me cringe but I wont like refuse service for it

I don't mind I would like we actually model both but we still get the I want. Its like shes stuck on those words. Like she'll say I would like want umm COOKIE

Oh one hand its cute on the others annoying.. I'm trying to thing ofa role playing game or something we could play to help pactice the diffrence but not sure what..
Deanna

 

[royaloakmi]

I just try to model as best I can b/c I can't stand asking my kids to use specific words. (The whole "say please" thing really grates my nerves.) I mostly try to use it in my response:

dd: "I want juice."
me: "You may have some juice."

That kind of thing. I think it takes a long time . . . and this one is particularly difficult, since it's not reinforced by anyone else anymore it seems.

Don't get me started on "further" and "farther."

 

[faithnj]

"Gimme, Gimme, My name is Jimmy."

OP-- Relax, and then practice, practice, practice. It will come in time.

As for us, "Thank you" was practically DD's first two words, LOL! She used to say it every single time anything exchanged hands. But I thought it would take forever to get her to say "please." I don't use it a lot, so I had to step up to the plate and make a concious effort to model it for her. Well, I'm pleased to say that after working on it for months, she has finally picked up "please." And she also says "I'm sorry." (That, she picked up on her own. I say "I'm sorry" every time I bump into her-- which is several times a day since she's always underfoot, LOL!)

As for the "I wants...." She just perfected the use of "I want.." in a sentence yesterday, while we were browsing in the mall. Yikes! She said "I want that thing," yesterday, and she hasn't stopped saying "I want..." yet. Arrrrgh! I think I may have to start modeling "May I..." sentences, because hearing "I want, I want, I want...." over the last 24 hours was about to drive me batty. For the first time, I'm not looking forward to hearing everything my DD has to say tomorrow, when she wakes up.

Faith

 

[Luthien Arcamenel]

Quote:

Originally Posted by royaloakmi That kind of thing. I think it takes a long time . . . and this one is particularly difficult, since it's not reinforced by anyone else anymore it seems.

I started the boys on "may I" right from the start, because I was still very young myself, and that is the way I was raised. I used a vastly different path in getting to it, but the end result was to be the same.

Well, now when my guys use this expression in public, all the Elders beam from ear to ear, and all the "younger" adults just look at them like

: .

:

 

[DevaMajka]

Perhaps word it as:
dd- "I want and apple"
you- "did you mean to ask 'may I have an apple'?" or something like that.
Then go on and give her the apple. Don't expect her to mimick you at the moment. Just trust that it will catch on eventually.

I personally don't care how ds asks at the moment. I'm sure in time I will want him to ask politely, and I will probably do the same type of thing in response to demanding and item "oh, are you asking me to get that for you." Just to remind him (and me) that what he's *trying* to do is to ask nicely. It just came out sorta wrong.