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<p>How do you respond to that??<br>
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<p>Assuming the asker (is that a word?) is someone you are moderately friendly with, so already knows the basics (family/occupation/location/etc.) I mean, it's not too hard to say something like, "Oh I work for XYZ, I have X kids, I like to paint & work out," but the other day, someone who already knew all that stuff asked me to tell her about myself and I just stood there clueless. I didn't say a word at first, then muttered something unintelligible about how I'm not good at talking about myself. Obviously socializing is an area in which I need lots of improvement. I felt really embarassed & I need to know what I'm expected to say if this ever comes up again (and I guess this isn't the first time, it was just asked in a very direct way that I couldn't easily skirt around!)</p>
 

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<p>I usually answer that question with a mixture of what my current passions are and highlights of my family history.  How much and what aspects depends on my mood, my audience, etc.</p>
 

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<p>like the above poster, i tend to talk about what i'm really excited about at the moment. :) right now i'm really into the Primal Blueprint / Paleo diet, and working on getting my AcroYoga certification. so they're likely to hear a lot about that.</p>
 

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<p>I hate that question. It really puts me on the spot. I feel like if you want to know about me, at least have the decency to start a conversation with something YOU are interested in. To me, its pretty much like saying "Hey, I wanna have a conversation, but I dont want to take any risks, so you go first".</p>
 

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<p>That's a strange question to ask. I've only ever been asked that in a job interview. I would not have known how to respond either.</p>
 

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<p>I ask for specifics they may want. I have a hard time coming up with answers to questions like that.</p>
 

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<p>I usually make a really lame joke like define the word 'yourself' for the asker. I agree that while it may be intended to be a just open ended curiosity, it comes across as a really lazy conversation starter!</p>
 

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<p>I would most likely say "you go first"... this way their response will give you have more of a sense of what it is they are truly getting at/looking for.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I dont like being asked a question like that and definitely makes me feel uncomfortable.   If someone didnt know me I would talk about my job and family and a few things I like to do... but if someone already knows that info -- I really wouldnt know how to respond either.</p>
 

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<p>I don't perform on command. If they already knew the basics and then asked such an open-ended question I'd just say, "You already know me. What are you interested in learning more about?" </p>
 
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<p>I ask this all the time when I interview people because it gives me a sense of their personality and priorities.  I have never had anyone ask me that under any other circumstances.  I would probably come up with an off the cuff snarky remark just to annoy them.</p>
 

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Did you want to answer the question? If so, I'd probably ask, "What is it that you want to know? I'm very complicated." <img alt="winky.gif" class="bbcode_smiley" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/winky.gif">
 

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<img alt="bow.gif" class="bbcode_smiley" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/bow.gif"> to you limabean!<br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>limabean</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280782/tell-me-about-yourself#post_16063279"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif"></a><br><br><p>I don't perform on command.</p>
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<p>How bout "I'm wearing purple stripey underwear, wanna see?" ;)</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Heh, I really have no idea. I like limabean's idea: "What exactly do you want to know?"</p>
 

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<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>InMediasRes</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280782/tell-me-about-yourself#post_16064539"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border-bottom:0px solid;border-left:0px solid;border-top:0px solid;border-right:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p>How bout "I'm wearing purple stripey underwear, wanna see?" ;) </p>
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<p><br><br><span><img alt="lol.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="width:15px;height:31px;"></span></p>
 

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<p>You could just reframe it in your mind as "how are things with you?" which is what I try to do if I have my wits about me.  So you'd get something like:</p>
<p> </p>
<p>acquaintance: "Tell me about yourself"</p>
<p>you: "Oh, things are going pretty well. I've been really busy with the kids. How about you?"</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It doesn't have to be a soul-baring question unless you want it to be. I think it can just be a weird way of saying "how are you doing?"</p>
 

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<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>crunchy_mommy</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280782/tell-me-about-yourself#post_16062069"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p>How do you respond to that??<br>
 </p>
<p>Assuming the asker (is that a word?) is someone you are moderately friendly with, so already knows the basics (family/occupation/location/etc.) I mean, it's not too hard to say something like, "Oh I work for XYZ, I have X kids, I like to paint & work out," but the other day, someone who already knew all that stuff asked me to tell her about myself and I just stood there clueless. I didn't say a word at first, then muttered something unintelligible about how I'm not good at talking about myself. Obviously socializing is an area in which I need lots of improvement. I felt really embarassed & I need to know what I'm expected to say if this ever comes up again (and I guess this isn't the first time, it was just asked in a very direct way that I couldn't easily skirt around!)</p>
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<p>Awkward silence and then "What would you like to know?"<br>
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Discussion Starter #17
<p><br>
Well the person who asked this most recently definitely was just trying to get to know me better, and she DID tell me a lot about herself (and I thought I had piped in with things about myself all along? lol) but I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who feels awkward with that question! I know I am not great with open-ended questions but this one really threw me for a loop!</p>
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>beanma</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280782/tell-me-about-yourself#post_16065572"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p>It doesn't have to be a soul-baring question unless you want it to be.</p>
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OK so this is really what I struggle with most I guess. I do want to let people get to know me. I do want to share myself & my life with them. But I have had such a dark, difficult past (and the past is often still right in the front of my mind, if that makes sense) so I'm always afraid I'm going to scare people away or let the wrong thing slip, so I tend to just not talk about myself at all. I've had lots of awkward conversations like today for ex., that somehow it came out that I left my parents' home at 16, and my friend asked where I lived while still in highschool, and I was like... uh at friends' houses? Which was true I guess for a few months here & there but I also spent a year in a psychiatric hospital and slept in my car or stayed in the parking lot at work 'til 5am... so where do I draw the line between sharing myself, and giving too much information, or scaring friends away? (There are many weird situations woven into my life like that, most tougher & scarier than that, so it's hard to talk about myself, how I met DH, where I went to college, etc. because if I say the wrong thing then I have to figure out how to answer an awkward question...) And there's not much to my present life, all I do is work, take care of DS, and sleep (or so it seems!) so I just don't know what else to talk about!!</p>
 

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<p>I guess it's not easy to say how much to share with other people. I'd rely mostly on the vibe I'm getting from them, their body language, and probably reveal a little at a time within my own comfort zone. Although, as introverted as I am, I find that when I like someone, I tend to tell them quite a lot about myself, usually just my weird quirks, not too much detail about my inner self, but more than usual. I wouldn't find anything such as what you typed in your last post as being awkward to hear if I had just asked you to tell me about yourself. If I asked you that, it would mean I want to know about you, get to know you, be a closer friend to you. But that's me, not your friend who I don't even know, so I can't possibly guess what <em>their</em> intention is. I wouldn't think that something you shared was 'the wrong thing' if I had asked such an open-ended question. I would probably feel special that you were comfortable enough, and trusting enough of me, to share such personal things with me.</p>
 

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<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>crunchy_mommy</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280782/tell-me-about-yourself#post_16066037"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p><br>
Well the person who asked this most recently definitely was just trying to get to know me better, and she DID tell me a lot about herself (and I thought I had piped in with things about myself all along? lol) but I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who feels awkward with that question! I know I am not great with open-ended questions but this one really threw me for a loop!</p>
<div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>beanma</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1280782/tell-me-about-yourself#post_16065572"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br><br><p>It doesn't have to be a soul-baring question unless you want it to be.</p>
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<p><br>
OK so this is really what I struggle with most I guess. I do want to let people get to know me. I do want to share myself & my life with them. But I have had such a dark, difficult past (and the past is often still right in the front of my mind, if that makes sense) so I'm always afraid I'm going to scare people away or let the wrong thing slip, so I tend to just not talk about myself at all. I've had lots of awkward conversations like today for ex., that somehow it came out that I left my parents' home at 16, and my friend asked where I lived while still in highschool, and I was like... uh at friends' houses? Which was true I guess for a few months here & there but I also spent a year in a psychiatric hospital and slept in my car or stayed in the parking lot at work 'til 5am... so where do I draw the line between sharing myself, and giving too much information, or scaring friends away? (There are many weird situations woven into my life like that, most tougher & scarier than that, so it's hard to talk about myself, how I met DH, where I went to college, etc. because if I say the wrong thing then I have to figure out how to answer an awkward question...) And there's not much to my present life, all I do is work, take care of DS, and sleep (or so it seems!) so I just don't know what else to talk about!!</p>
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<p><br>
I can identify with this, due to some difficult things in my past also.  It does make your nerves stand on end when someone wants to get close, out of fear they won't like us or will be scared away by something we say.  I often find myself intentionally pushing people away for this reason, out of fear that if I leave it up to them, they will run off anyway. I have to stop and mentally slap myself sometimes, to stop being afraid of getting close.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I think the previous poster's idea of turning the question back at the asker, as in "what do you want to know?" is the perfect way to go.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Otherwise you could just be truthful and say pretty much what you said "There is not a lot to say about my present life, I work, take care of my son, and sleep!"  Then just smile...and wait for the person to respond. Or you could add.."when I have more time in the future, I am hoping to take up more interests, such as x,y,z...."</p>
 

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<p>This just happened to me this week in a relaxed social setting.  I smiled and replied what do you want to know? </p>
 
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