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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi,
We're officially on our first week of "trying" for a baby, and I am so scared. I was kind of hoping someone could just reassure me that I'm doing the right thing. Our dd wasn't really planned. We accidentally got pregnant twice before we got pregnant with her and mc at 5 and 6 weeks so I didn't think I would ever be able to have a baby. When I got pregnant with her I was so worried I would lose her I never really enjoyed being pregnant. And on top of it I had kind of a difficult pregnancy and after she was born I almost bled to death so that was really scary too. So now my daughter is almost 3 and I really want another baby, a really want her to be a big sister. But since I've never planned a pregnancy I'm so nervous. I'm scared of mc again, that my dd will hate the baby. That I'll be terribly sick while pregnant again. That the baby will be unhealthy. That I will die during birth and leave dh with 2 babies... Then I worry I won't be able to get pregnant at all... The worrying just never stops. I've also had anxiety whenever I leave the house that started when I weaned dd last January, I'm guessing it's a hormonal thing, and now I'm worried I'll have that on top of being pregnant with a toddler to take care of. Am I the only one that is this freaked out about being pregnant? It's so weird because I really want a baby though. I just don't want to be pregnant. Sorry for the novel, I just can't talk to anyone else, because no one else knows we're trying:grimacing:
 

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While it is certainly normal to worry about all those thing it does sound like your anxiety about them is becoming intrusive. I would suggest you pursue some counselling to help you manage the anxiety and possibly even delay TTC for awhile until it is more under control :)


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I was as anxious as you about trying for #2 , and after a long road that included some counseling I realized I didn't want any more children. I was fixated on giving my DD a sibling and wasn't willing to admit to myself that I was truly happy with just one. My DD is 9 now and I look back on that period in my life and I am SO grateful we never got pregnant again. I love the family that we are and my DD is thriving as a only child.

I recommend some therapy (maybe even just a couple sessions) to get to the root of your feelings. This is a complicated heavy issue and a huge decision.

GL
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thank you guys:blush: I think part of it is not being in control. It's scary not knowing what will happen. But I just have to hope for the best. I talked to dh last night. He is my best therapy. Lol I'm one of those people that plans everything and this is something you really can't plan all the way. You just have to trust that it will work out. And while I would still be so happy if my dd turned out to be my only. I know I would regret not giving a second baby a chance to happen. So I guess I just have to go against my nature and just let what happens happen. I am looking into some type of therapy if the anxiety doesn't go away. It is slowly getting better though. So I have hope.
 
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