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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I hate even typing this out because I believe very strongly in CLW...DD is 19 mths old and the last two weeks or so I have been starting to get that icky feeling when she nurses, made worse when she insists on playing with the other nipple. Over the course of the past few days the feeling has gotten worse, so bad that I want to cry when she wants to nurse...which is pretty much all.the.time. And she always has to play with the other nipple, which is really making me just fly off the handle.

She only eats about 1 tbs of solids a day so 99% of her nutrition is breastmilk. I am not ready to wean yet and she is far far far from being ready to wean but I am losing my mind. Not to mention she always wants to nurse, all day, all night. I feel horrible that I want to rip her off the boob but at the same time I can't deal with the feelings nursing is bringing out.
 

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I have noticed it is related to my cycles, when it's getting close to AF, I get that icky feeling, too.


I think it's just a change in hormones. For me, I drink more of the Mother's Milk tea and try to read/write on MDC while nursing her.
 

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's Mamma. I so totally know how you feel. My ds2 is 18mo and I have been experiencing the same feelings. It makes me feel really guilty, and above all, the last thing I want is for my son to have memories of nursing and Mommy being frustrated! I've had to put a time limit during the day when I seem to have the "shortest fuse". We try counting to 10 or 20, then stopping the nursing session and trying to get involved in another activity ( this approach actually works better with my 3.5yo as he knows how to count, not always so well with my 18mo ). As for the nipple twidling, you might want to try and keep your other breast totally covered, or give your dd something else really cool to hold with her free hand.

It gets better Mamma, there are always gonna be rainy days....try to keep focused on ALL the good things about extended nursing.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thanks


i don't have any cycles since I had my IUD put in 7 months ago so luckily no hormonal fluctuations. I do keep the other breast covered, especially since I work at my kids school and do my best not to expose all of myself
but that doesn't stop her hands from creeping. I've tried giving her other things to hold and play with but it just doesn't work. *sigh* I didn't get this feeling with my other two...well I did with DS but he was almost 3 and I was tandem nursing so there ya go. Just seems way to early for the feeling to be hitting.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by MamaInTheBoonies View Post
I have noticed it is related to my cycles, when it's getting close to AF, I get that icky feeling, too.


I think it's just a change in hormones.
nak as i type,lol. ita with this.I have been feeling the exact same way with my 2 yr old ds. in fact im feeling that "touched out" feeling right now as he nurses. i have been getting like this for a while and recently i noticed its usually before my period,like a week or so before.
s. i know how you feel.
 

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I understand what you are going through as my son was a major twiddler. I had to cut that out of our nursing relationship or else I would not be happily nursing him still. What I did was hold my shirt down the one breast while he nursed on the other to not give access to it with his hand. I talked to him and explained to him why it is not ok for him to play with mommy's other nipple. I also told him that nummies are for nursing only not for playing. Eventually, he got it and when he is ready to switch to the other breast, he deliberately pulls the shirt down on the side he has finished with to signal his readiness.

That really helped me A LOT....for me the twiddling drove me over the edge. Maybe if you could adjust that part of your nursing time, that may help too?
 

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You are a great mom to be nursing your sweet toddler. My DS went through a phase where he had to play with my other nipple. It gave me the willies to the point that I couldn't nurse when he did it. I got him (this is weird) to put his finger in my belly button instead. It worked.
I will not let him play wtih the other nipple though. I'll push his hand away, wear a sports bra over that nipple... whatever. But I don't let him do it. It leads to a more peaceful nursing experience.
 

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I was just wishing today for a child-proof latch on my nursing bras. Ds loves to play with the clasp until it drives. me. nuts. Not as bad as nipple twiddling, though!

Does it work for you to put your forearm across your breast (the one you're not nursing with) to protect the nipple? I do that, and then offer ds my hand to play with instead. It sounds awkward but it's a really natural position in which to hold your hand.
 

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I understand...i went through this...oddly enough, it has actually gotten better, but from like 18-22 months, ot got worse and worse....i posted here a coule ties..and then the last couple months it has gotten better, but still not great......For me, it was so bad there were times i forcibly pulled her off the boob and literally flung her away from me. It was terrible. We were both sobbing and hysterical......I almost completely weaned.

We did partially wean....we nurse a lot less frequently now, and for less time, than we used to...and that helps a LOT.
 

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It sounds like you just need to create some nursing boundaries. You sound like you don't want to wean for many reasons which is great! But you are entitled to have feelings about how things go. At 19 months your child is old enough to respect the basic no twiddling boundary. Maybe if you explain it before a nursing session and gently remind her if she starts you can get rid of the behavior. You may also want to think about removing her from the breast when she doesn't respect the boundary. I would guess that doing that only once or twice would help her understand you are serious and you are more than happy to nurse, but that behavior has to stop.

I am going through the same thing with my son and pinching while nursing. He's quite a bit younger, but I think we are making some headway, but it's been difficult.

Good luck!
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Thank you everyone. It really helps knowing I am not alone in the touched out, nipple twiddling feelings!

I have been trying to set boundaries but she really freaks out when I move her hand away from my other nipple. I keep it covered, keep my hand over it, distract her. She is just VERY stubborn (dunno where she gets that from
) and determined. I am going to keep working on the boundaries and hope that works.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by MamaInTheBoonies View Post
I have noticed it is related to my cycles, when it's getting close to AF, I get that icky feeling, too.


me too and it didnt occur to me until after it had happened a few months in a row that it was only for a few days that I had that icky feeling. After I read a few others experiences on here, I realized that's exactly what it is. Still, it's not fun. You just gotta get thru it.
 

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For DS it took a LONG time for him to really accept that he could not twiddle the other nipple. I found it easiest to try to cover the other nipple with my free arm--- basically way too heavy for DS to move, though he tried!

I also wanted to mention that for many people, 17-21/22 months is the VERY hardest part of their nursing career. Kids that age seem to be very needy/high frequency nursers, but they are also big and unmanageable. It *does* get better though.

It might make you feel a bit more proactive to chart and see if the icky feelings are associated in any way with your cycle. Also, don't ignore your needs! Can you get a little more (or any) alone time, do something your body finds relaxing, etc...?

Good luck.
 

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I have been having this feeling too but ds2 is only 13 months. Last time I had this feeling it was when I was pg with ds2 and ds1 was nursing. So I got all freaked out that I was pg! But AF is due in a week, so that must be it. I'm going to stuff him full of solids for a few days to give myself a break.
 

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My 2 year old also tries to play with the other nipple and I cannot stand it. I was more tolerant when she was much younger, but I feel she is old enough to learn some nursing manners.

Whenever she reaches for the other nipple I hold her hand and gently say "I don't like that." Often, I have to do this 3 or 4 times each nursing session but I intend to keep at it. She doesn't seem unhappy when I do it, she just keeps sucking away and then her hand begins to creep over again and I remind her again that I don't like her to do that.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Mama8 View Post
Okay, please forgive me but what exactly is "that icky feeling"?

Well,I can't describe it,only to say,you will *know* if you get it. Does that make sense?
It's kind of like a "crawling out of my own skin" feeling for me,if that makes sense,just an urgency for the nursing to be done with.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by Mama8 View Post
Okay, please forgive me but what exactly is "that icky feeling"?

Its the heebie jeebies.

The feeling of just wanting them to be done already.
 

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Yes, boundaries are a good thing! I usually put a stuffed animal, sock, or anything else handy in DD's hand when she gets too active (the hand under her . . .I don't even like my stomach touched). I have NEVER allowed access to the other nipple while nursing either so she doesn't even know that's an option . . .if she still gets too touchy for me, I put her down, and then start over again. If she keeps doing it, then we do something besides nurse. This has worked with both of my girls.

My rule is, for the 1st year, baby gets it all . . .no rules. The 1st year on (whenever it becomes necessary), the "relationship" comes into play, and I get a say in things, too.

 
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