[MissSavannahsMommy]

I understand what you're saying, but i'm going to write this at least in my defense. This is my ONLY outlet where i can vent about my ex. IRL, i never say anything bad about my ex, nor do i let people know how much it affects me. This honestly feels like the only "safe" ground i have because everyone here is so supportive and understanding and I feel like I can relate to everything people say on this board b/c the problem with being "ap" and dealing with an ex is that generally ex's (or courts for that matter) do not understand why we do the things we do which leads to huge problems (as i'm sure you've seen throughout this board)

To be quite honest, my ex is the only "negative" thing about me being a single parent. I don't mind being utterly exhausted, i don't have a problem with ANY asepct of being "single", i don't mind not dating. I really have nothing to complain about. Call me selfish, but i'm so glad *I"M* the only one who gets to experince my life with my dd. Granted her dad sees her and right now we have an amicable relationship but for the most part, she's with me full time and I'd have it no other way. I don't like sharing

Please feel free by all means to say you're having a bad day and something is bothering you. We're all here to listen, support, and encourage you. I'm sorry you feel that this board is almost always about dealing with ex's but unfortunately dealing (or not dealing with exs) is a HUGE part of being a single parent.

 

[MissSavannahsMommy]

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The few single moms I've met have no clue about AP, and/or are very young. My old friends from before I had my son don't have kids, or their kids are grown.

I totally know what you're saying but i'm on the opposite spectrum, i'm totally isolated b/c no one takes me seriously b/c i am young and i look like i'm a 12 year old oompa loompa! You're talking to the one time playgroup dropout. I'm young, not married, single, and i don't let my kid sleep in a crib or *gasp* cry for all hours of the night. I don't fit in ANYWHERE. The APers are all married and have husbands who love them and work a bazillion hours a day to provide for them. The playgroup people are older, married, and i can't stand hearing about Ferber (sp?) or how they're giving their 6 week old God only knows. I can so relate, but i'm just at a point right now where i don't really care. Sure, it's isolating and i do have my blue days, but i really feel like this is what i was meant to do so i just accept the lonely days and realize that tomorrow will come and maybe it'll be better.

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I mean, the consuming issue in my life seem to be trying to hold it together and be a good parent while feeling like a hamster on a wheel...a wheel that never stops. Surely I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Absolutely not!!! I sure 99.9% of us here would say the same thing. I'm so sorry you're feeling like this. Have you talked to a councelor? How about taking a few hours just for you a week? Do something simple- take a relaxing bath, go get a cup of coffee and not worry about inahling it because you've got a kiddo doing nuts in Starbucks, just have maybe a half an hour of you time once in a while. You're so worth it!