[readytobedone]

sometimes DD just wants to suck...and suck and suck. this is her usual way of getting to sleep for naps but especially for bedtime...she will do it for over an hour, then sometimes she'll get a poopy diaper or something and she has to get changed and we come back and start over for another half hour or hour...there is some nursing mixed in sometimes, but most of it is just sucking.

in theory i am fine with it. i know comfort is a real need. in practice it is eroding my sanity

not to mention her latch gets all funky as she gets sleepier and it's actually uncomfortable for me. my nipples get sore.

i need solutions for this! and believe me, we've tried the paci. i have no problems giving it. she took one at birth (not by my choice) but has since eschewed them in favor of the boob. i think i'm going to start trying more in earnest to get her to take them--she doesn't cry or fuss when i give one, just looks confused, so i think she "forgot" what they're for?!?!

right now i've handed her off to DH to see if he can rock her to sleep. we need another way to get her to go down besides mama's boobs...i am slowly losing it. any other suggestions for what to do here?

also, is this something babies will continue to do for a long time or more a newborn thing? i think if i knew there was an end in sight it might help.

 

[kdtmom2be]

Can't help, just wanted to commisserate. We have the same issue around here and DH is currently bouncing and jiggling DD to calm her. My nipples were SO sore yesterday.

We also have the same trouble with the "eroding" latch, which is undoubtedly the cause of the sore nipples. I've been watching her more closely today and she starts to suck in her top lip when she gets sleepier, so I've been sticking a finger in to pull it back out and that seems to be helping.

I hope they outgrow the need for sucking constantly.... I mean sooner than kindergarten!

 

[cjanelles]

I'm no expert by far...my baby is 18 days old and this is the first time I'm BFing, so it's all new to me, but...

One of my nurses made a comment while we were still in the hospital that I already *knew* logically, but hadn't really considered...Basically, she reminded me that Baby will equate the smell and feel of Mom with feeding, so that even if all she needs is some comforting, if Mom is holding her, she's also getting feeding signals sent to her little brain.

So, the nurse suggested that I let Dad hold her when she seemed to be fussy but not hungry. And really, it's worked for us since we've been home.

I don't know how old your baby is, but I know that mine is changing her habits every day, so it's hard to know what's going to work each time, so I keep trying stuff that's failed previously...and wouldn't you know it, sometimes an old, failed trick actually works.

Good luck with your babe.

 

[mothragirl]

try giving her yuor pinky with the nail side on her tongue

 

[alegna]

I was going to say- get used to it- it's normal and lasts forever, then I glanced at the calendar

I expect you're at the 6 week growth spurt. That one was hard for us. But in a few more weeks you all of a sudden wake up from the haze and realize you can handle this whole parenting thing

I would resist pushing the pacifier at this particular time, if she's working to increase your supply, you don't want to prolong that process.

In a month it will be a whole new game.

-Angela

 

[soulyluna]

the only thing i can suggest trying is to continue a variety of comfort techniques other than the boob and see how they work. Walking in the sling, trying to show her own thumb to her for sucking, or even a swing. Yes, I never thought i'd be a baby swing user, but i got one as a hand-me-down and sometimes it is the only thing that works to sooth the babe to sleep.

 

[LilMomma83]

nak

what works for us..

paci (but with his cheek resting on my bare breast) i think he feels more comforted that wat than just stuffing the thing in his mouth.

a finger - at least that's human flesh - he always prefers that to a paci.

 

[SPOpa]

..

 

[TirzhaZ]

I just wanted to give a little encouragement! It does get easier. When our daughter was born (she's 5 months now) she had an incredible need to suck all the time and my nipples took a beating! I swore off the pacifier at first and then decided I would hold off for just a month until I knew she had the BF'ing down pat. After a week I realized I really couldn't let her suck 24 hours a day (okay, not really 24. More like 19!) I gave in and let her have a pacifier which calmed her for a time. We figured out she preferred our pinky to the pacifier, presumably because it was much more personal since it was our flesh. But, at night she still wanted to suck on the ol' boob until she fell asleep. We worked on showing her where her hands were so she could self-soothe at times that I just couldn't let her nurse, like in the car and while she wasn't with me. After about 3 months she started being able to find her hands and work them toward her mouth. Now at 5 months she is a little expert hand sucker and soothes herself most of the time. This helps sooo much at bedtime since I always put her in her crib when she was drowsy but awake. She just pops her hands in her mouth and drifts off to sleep. Best of luck!

EDIT: Just read the reply above mine and wanted to say that I totally recommend nursing while laying down. We full time co-slept for the first two months and part-time co-sleep now and nursing while laying down saved so much of my sanity. Sometimes that was the only way I got any sleep at all! Good luck again!

 

[arlecchina]

Quote:

Originally Posted by alegna I was going to say- get used to it- it's normal and lasts forever

mine does this also...plus twisting the opposite nipple and sticking a toe in my belly button and pushingggggggg...(we side-lay for sleeping)

no advice but lots of sympathy

 

[MommytoTwo]

Quote:

paci (but with his cheek resting on my bare breast

ditto

 

[carnalcindd]

I have a boobie monster too, but I always just thought he was hungry all the time. I think we are just finishing the 6 week growth spurt now. I was wondering how you know the difference between the baby eating and just sucking. Family members say my ds is using me as a pasi, but I answer that he is eating. I truly don't know how to tell tho...

 

[readytobedone]

Quote:

Originally Posted by carnalcindd I have a boobie monster too, but I always just thought he was hungry all the time. I think we are just finishing the 6 week growth spurt now. I was wondering how you know the difference between the baby eating and just sucking. Family members say my ds is using me as a pasi, but I answer that he is eating. I truly don't know how to tell tho...

listen for swallowing

also, comfort sucks are light and feel tickle-y to me. nutritive sucking feels like long, pulling draws from the breast. sometimes DD will start w/ nutritive, switch to comfort, then switch back...

 

[alegna]

But never assume it's safe to give a pacifier to replace comfort sucking at the breast. That comfort sucking is telling your body exactly what your child needs.

-Angela

 

[koalove]

ooooh mama i feel for you. my son is 2 and a half now but believe me, you are not alone here. my son wanted to suck night and day untill i stopped letting him. my brazillian friend came to visit us when my boy was 10 months old and she was amazed to see that i nursed him to sleep and it took FOREVER to get him down. she said in brazil the women never let their babies fall asleep on the breast. just feed him untill hes very full and then unlatch him right before he drifts off and then find another way to help him sleep. now that he is used to nursing to sleep it might take a week for him to get used to a new routine, but it will work! i did it with my son and was so happy to not be resentful and in pain as his human pacifier (and VERY tired and frusterated for that week). one thing i have learned as a parent is that these little buggers will adapt to just about anything. they just need us to set healthy and loving guidelines! good luck

 

[MotherDuck]

Alegna, please can you explain your last post? What is the message that my body needs to hear? I know that there are reasons to avoid a pacifier (such as interferring with milk supply), but if, as in our case, we have plenty of milk and she is happy, what harm is the pacifier? Just to be clear, I am not criticising what you say - just want to understand.

So far, what has been working for us (3.5 mth old) for getting her to sleep is that she gets tired about every 2.5 - 4 hours (except the nights can be longer intervals) and gets grizzly when she is tired. I cradle her in my arms (face turned in to me) with a pacifier in her mouth and she usually just about falls asleep in my arms. Even if she is still a bit grizzly, I put her in her crib awake with the pacifier (on her side - the only way she likes to fall asleep - she turns onto her back as she sleeps) and she drifts off. Sometimes she might take a while to sleep (requiring the pacifier to be "reinstalled" a few times), but mostly this is her preferred sleep routine.

She will sleep sucking the pacifier - when the sleep is deep, it falls out. She might wake after say 30 - 50 minutes, but (as long as her butt is clean and dry) she is only just "surfacing" and will drop right off again when we put the pacifier back in and turn her back on her side. Occasionally, I have to cradle her in my arms again to settle her before putting her back in the crib.

If she wakes cos she has pooped or peed, she will normally go to sleep again fairly easily following the same routine after being changed.

Hope that helps, readytobedone.

 

[alegna]

Quote:

Originally Posted by MotherDuck Alegna, please can you explain your last post? What is the message that my body needs to hear? I know that there are reasons to avoid a pacifier (such as interferring with milk supply), but if, as in our case, we have plenty of milk and she is happy, what harm is the pacifier? Just to be clear, I am not criticising what you say - just want to understand.

I'm just saying that supply problems and nipple preference can happen at any time. It is never "safe" to use artificial nipples. I understand that in some cases it is a reasonable risk, but many people think that past X age it's no longer a risk and that's simply not true.

-Angela

 

[User101]

Moving out to the general breastfeeding forum

 

[babymakesthree]

I'm sorry I'm not going to be much help but my dd still naps and sleeps attached to the boob and she is 8 months old today. I actually like it because I just sit and play online and snuggle with her.

 

[addis_mommy]

I feel for you. We definately had a boob a holic till a few weeks ago. Addi will be 5 months in a few days and has recently entered a very curious aware stage. I'm lucky to get her to stay at the boob more than 5 combined mintues. Half the time she just screams bloody murder when I try to nurse her. It's very frustrating. And no she gets no bottles. I can remember though thinking I was gonna go crazy with the constant need to suck. Plus I had friends saying...oh my ds bf in 15 min. Ha, every time I nursed it was a 45min - 1.5 hr deal and then started all over again sometimes only an hour later. I did have supply issues though so at some point her constant sucking was a struggle to get milk. I now take something to help with my supply. All I can say is hang in there mama, one day you'll long for the closeness you now share. Oh and pacis work well for us now.