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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Ds came home from school (first grade) today, eager to provide for me a complete and thorough retell of the day's events. His renditions of his school experiences are always a little spooky because most are verbatim-- his words and his teacher's especially. Today, he told about the read-aloud the teacher introduced to the class, <i>The Little Red Hen</i>. Apparently, in an attempt to make a nonfiction tie-in, she showed the cover of the book to the class and said, "Tell me what you know about chickens." Som classmates said, "They are birds," and "They lay eggs," and "They live on farms." My son observed the silly cartoonish illustration of a chicken with a purple hat, smoking a pipe, and when the teacher prompted the class again with, "Tell me what else you know about chickens." he volunteered, "They don't wear hats." I guess the others found his remark rather amusing because he says everyone laughed and the teacher replied in a "serious way" that "That's not what I'm looking for." Ds seems to be enjoying this kind of attention that comes from his peers when he makes funny remarks in class and receives a little bit of disapproval from his teacher. He has shared other similar stories ver the past couple of weeks. I come from a long line of classroom rebels- particularly my very intelligent dad and brother. Should I discourage his behavior and encourage him to answer only the types of responses that <span style="text-decoration:underline;">are</span> what his teacher's looking for? Or should I be okay with his emerging boundary-pushing attitude?<br><br>
I am coming at this from two perspectives, as his mom but also a public school elementary teacher myself. And, fwiw, I <i>never</i> would have commented the way his teacher did to him!
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> I am so laughing right now, because it's kids like this that I love the most! What a riot! Where's that teacher's sense of humor??! On the other hand, I know how difficult it is trying to teach a "healthy" respect for authority. I will be interested in the responses because I just know I'm going to be faced with this with my ds and my dd -- they really like to be funny.....My dd now asks me when she gets in trouble for being inappropriately silly, "That's not funny?" And then she tries to convince me that, indeed, what she did or said was truly VERY funny and thinks I should be laughing.<br><br>
BTW -- being a smart a*# is very much part of my personality. My mouth got me in trouble so much growing up.....I was incorrigible. It's no wonder that my kids are picking up on this. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 

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I think it's great. He is right they DON'T wear hats. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">: I too was laughing my butt off when I read this. As a teacher myself I would have laughed and answered him completely differently
 

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Would it be a good opportunity to just reinforce some social perceptions and skills?<br><br>
I don't know that your ds did anything wrong, really. But he's probably feeling conflicted about the encounter given that he wanted to go over it with you later on.<br><br>
I think I'd be tempted to laugh with him about his answer, and maybe comment about how it feels good to be the focus of other's attention and share in their laughter. But then also go on to talk about teacher and what she might have been feeling. How it might have made her feel frustrated or sad that the kids were laughing when she was trying to teach them. How maybe he (ds) could think about when to make funny comments, and how sometimes it's best to hold off until later or to just think the comment to yourself without saying it outloud.<br><br>
He seems bright and perceptive enough to grasp such subtleties, and he can spin the encounter into a much more complex and interesting learning issue than the attributes of chickens <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> .
 

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Funny kid. If he went on to say "and they don't smoke pipes", "and they aren't cartoonish", etc. then I'd think there was something to talk about. It sounds like he backed off once the teacher indicated she wasn't amused. I think this is a good example that some teachers are really going to enjoy kids like this and some aren't. That's unfortunate but true.
 

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Oh momma....<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> my ds is soooo like that...same grade...it seems it's just one of those things...I am hoping ds grows out of his snarky mouth soon!!!
 

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See, I don't see this as just being a smart-ass. Your son gave a perfectly respectable answer and the teacher did not give him the recognition he deserves. I'm assuming this is probably a common thing with him. If he thinks outside the box a lot and give answers different than most people would, and is constantly dismissed, maybe he's found that it's better to TRY to be a smart-ass, rather than giving honest answers and being put down. Does that make any sense at all? It's like the difference between being laughed WITH and laughed AT.<br><br>
I feel sorry for the teacher who cannot appreciate how children percieve things. If she dismisses him a lot, I wouldn't doubt he's trying to get back at her by disrupting the classroom. That's how I see it anyways. Not that he's being a smart-ass just to be a smart-ass, but doing it so that at the very least, his PEERS will respect what he says even if the teacher doesn't.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>bandgeek</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/6506544"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">See, I don't see this as just being a smart-ass. Your son gave a perfectly respectable answer and the teacher did not give him the recognition he deserves. I'm assuming this is probably a common thing with him. If he thinks outside the box a lot and give answers different than most people would, and is constantly dismissed, maybe he's found that it's better to TRY to be a smart-ass, rather than giving honest answers and being put down. Does that make any sense at all? It's like the difference between being laughed WITH and laughed AT.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">: I laughed. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mischievous.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="mischief"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
It sounds to me as though your little guy's social skills are really coming along nicely. He's coping well, you know? He's also teaching his teacher a valuable lesson-- ask a silly question, get a silly answer. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue">
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>eilonwy</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/6507011"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that">: I laughed. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/mischievous.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="mischief"><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
It sounds to me as though your little guy's social skills are really coming along nicely. He's coping well, you know? He's also teaching his teacher a valuable lesson-- ask a silly question, get a silly answer. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue"></div>
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That's exactly what my husband said-- ds probably thought the question was ridiculous and was looking for a more interesting way to participate. I do believe, for the first time ever, that his social skills are coming along. Not that he's Mr. Social or even looks to play with the other boys at recess time (he's strictly into girls) but he definitely strives to do and say things that interest and appeal to his classmates, and I think he's learning he's better in that departmet than most. But, I am reluctant to sit back and allow him to define his position as "class clown," or whatever, at this early point in his academic career without at least questioning whether it's okay and if I need to intervene. Whew- how's that for a long-winded sentence you probably couldn't follow!<br><br>
bandgeek, your response gave me a new perspective, which I really appreciate. I'm thinking you're right.
 
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