[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by RachelMolly I know I saw a post, Tikvah I think?, saying that we do not do Thanksgiving. We were talking about this over shabbes, how one friend thinks it's the most Jewish of the American holidays. We were talking about what the truly American holidays are: July 4th, Veteran's Day, Memorial Day, Flag Day etc . And that there are Jews who dafka (on purpose) do not celebrate it. Anyone who fits into this category care to please share? Aside from the practicality (why have a yuntiv-shabbes when you don't really *have* to...ie. Thanksgiving thursday then Shabbes the next night), why don't some yidden celebrate this very American of holidays that symbolizes our freedom to live our lives however we'd like in this free country of ours?

Well, if it weren't for the nice Chabanicks we met at the thrift store when I was pg with DS, I don't know who would have been there for his Bris! He was born on a Wednesday night, and the following Thursday was Thanksgiving day!

Nobody could make it to the Bris, as they were busy at their on Thanskgiving gatherings. The Mohel obviously made it, the Chabbad rebbetzin was the only woman not related to anybody who held the baby prior to the Bris itself (apparently there's some custom regarding this? This was the 3rd Bris I'd been to in my entire life, the first 2 being when I was 2.5 and 9, respectively.) We managed to "borrow" 6 men from our next-door neighboor's Thanksgiving feast so we could have a minyon!

(and then I posted about it on the message board I frequented at the time and was introduced to the circ debate in a very offensive way.)

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by RachelEve14 : Well here I am. I totally missed the last thread : We were busy moving (we are now in NJ, going to NYC next month). We both miss Israel, but it was important to come for my parents to show we are "trying" to live in the good old US of A. We are here until June 25, unless by some miricle dh finds a great job and we fall totally in love with the US and decide to stay. So that is our update. We are all recovered from jetlag and adjusting to life here. This time of the year it is so difficult to be in the US. I hate being in the US in Nov / Dec. : WAAAAAAA I just wanna go home. Anyway I will try to keep up on the thread even though we are still moving about between NJ and NY, and we are not settled into our own place (read: I share the computer with my dad ) yet.

Good luck on your upcoming move and welcome back to the thread!

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Originally Posted by mom2seven Um - ladies. Kislev doesn't start until tomorrow night.

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Originally Posted by Nickarolaberry Oops! My calendar says Rosh Chodesh. D'oh! Oh well.

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Originally Posted by mom2seven It *is* rosh chodesh, but it's not Kislev until tomorrow night. On a two day rosh chodesh, the first day is the last day of the previous month.

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Originally Posted by Nickarolaberry Oh. Noone ever told me that before. See, you just illuminated my ignorance. :

You two are too cute!

I learned all about the Rosh Chodesh thingie when I learned that my Hebrew Birthday is Rosh Chodesh Elul (the 2nd day, the first actual day of Elul.)

We're one Jewish month away from my DD's Bat Mitzvah!!! (where's that tearing your hair out smilie?) Invitations went out today, the food is mostly planned, we know where we're having it (shul) but we're so disorganized. At least we all have new clothes to wear for it!

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Originally Posted by mamimapster as for me, I am now the owner of a new HARD cast-plaster even. Went to the dr today and got to see my poor arm for 1/2 hour (and WASH it.......ahhhhh ) i couldnt move it at all even when the cast was off, which was scary, my right arm still had to move my left. B"H the doc said all is healing well and no infection- in 2-3 weeks this cast comes off and i go into a (bendable brace??). IL's arrive tomorrow. Im davening hard for a peacefull visit with *NO*kashrus skirmishes!

I can relate to that washing thing right now with my foot. I was never "not allowed to wash it" but it's awfully hard to get in and out of a bathtub when you can only put weight on one foot!! Baruch Hashem I'm more mobile now.

Good luck with the inlaws.

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Originally Posted by mamaverdi Answer a Q for me. So my ds1 (6.5 yrs) says that he was told in Judaics today (Orthodox school) that Rivka married Yitzak when she was 3.5 yrs old. And he was already a man. And then lived with his family until she was old enough to be his wife. Did my ds remember the story wrong? Or...so I've never heard this before

Yeah, I've heard that before as well. My DDs just learned this again recently, and I had to clarify that Yitzak wasn't a child molester! Unlike your 6yo, they know what goes on after a wedding and why it's not appropriate for a 3yo!!!

 

[Ruthla]

I generally try to forget/ignore the Puritanical roots to American Thanksgiving and simply think of it as a day of thanksgiving.

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by gilamama and talya finally weaned : i am really proud of her.

Just so you know, I almost typed in [/WEAN] just now!!!

: on the weaning!

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ruthla what are you doing for your dds batmitzvah? i take it your are not gettingher betrothed huh?

You know, that might be easier- do a combination Bat Mitzvah/Betrothal and throw one less party!!

Then again, these days the Betrothal and Chassana(wedding) are lumped into one anyway, right?

Oh, speaking of weddings- last Friday DS' kindergarten class held a mock wedding of Rivka and Yitzak. DS was the rabbi. When practicing, he said "Rivka and Yitzak will get married, with a ring and a tuba!!"

At the actual performance, he said "ketuba" correctly.

Back to the Bat Mitzvah- we're having it in the basement of the shul. My friend is doing the catering- my parents will reimburse her for the cost of the food, the labor is her gift. She already spoke with both rebbetzins and they approve of her kashrus. Normally they only allow catering from specific places, and only fleishigs(meat), but they'll let us do dairy as long as it's chalav yisrael and we don't heat anything up in their oven. So we'll heat things up at home and bring them over hot, and put them in brand new chafing dishes (since the ones the shul already owns are fleishig.) We're also making as much cold stuff as possible- lots of salads! The only hot food we're definitely making is (frozen kineret) latkes.

My Mom, of course, is going crazy with this and wants to hire some kind of entertainment- which DD doesn't even want. All she wants is to have some Jewish music playing in the background. The only issue really is figuring out who we can borrow the stereo equipment from.

And whether or not to invite a certain teacher. DD1 wants to invite all her teachers (along with all her friends in her new school, her old school, and from camp.) I really don't want to invite this particular teacher because of how she's be-en treating my younger DD- I'm about to pull her out of the class, and I know of at least one other mother who's doing the same. The mailed invitations went out yesterday (except for a few that got forgotten and went out today) and she's handing the rest out in school. For now we compromised and she won't invite this teacher before next week.

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by eilonwy Bella can say "I wuv you!" : There is nothing in the world more adorable than a baby saying "Mamma" and "I wuv you." : She's such a sugar bunny!

Awwww!!!!!

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by jkpmomtoboys Hi everyone, Has been forever since I checked in and said "hi" but I need some help... My brother and sister-in-law had a baby girl last Friday...they are doing the baby naming and luncheon at home this Friday at home...they are doing it themselves, without an officiant but want me to do a reading... Have any of you had baby namings for girls? I know there are some "traditional" readings to do but can't find them anywhere (and I've only had or been to brisses...) A particular psalm? They're doing blessings, etc... already... Any help would be so appreciated... Thanks thanks thanks!

No advice but I want to wish you a hearty Mazel Tov!!!!

Rivka

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by yonit Lactaid makes OU EggNog?????? That is the best news I have heard all day!! I LOVE Egg Nog. I wait for it all year round. LOL But we only do Cholev Yisroel - and no one makes that. I have tried to find various pareve soy egg nogs, but they never seem to have any - at least around here. I will look for the lactaid kind.... I have tried making it myself, but it is never as good.

Lactaid isn't pareve or Chalav Yisrael- i'ts just low in lactose so lactose-intolerant people can drink it without getting tummyaches. Real eggnog is made with heavy cream and is naturally low in lactose.

Silk egg nog is

I haven't had the dairy kind in years(I've never seen it made with goat milk!) so I can't really compare it to the "real stuff."

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Originally Posted by Nickarolaberry I'm not a huge eggnog fan in general but the idea of pareve soy eggnog strikes me as kind of .... icky. Sorry.

But have you actually tasted it? Or used it as a coffee creamer? OR for french toast?

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by jul511riv Did you know that there was a kabalistic rabbi who, when asked for a bracha on the marriage of one of his students, offered him these two pearls. Indulge in two things in a marriage, said the rabbi. Intercourse and food.

I disagree. What about foreplay?

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Originally Posted by jkpmomtoboys Thank you everyone so much! I am quite an Internet traveler but had never been to ritualwell.net. It's great! Lots of good ideas... I did just read something that maybe someone here can clarify because I've never heard of it: there's a comment in one of the ceremonies that says that according to halakhah, coming through the birth canal confers upon a baby the status of a Jew. The only other way a baby could become a Jew, according to halakhah is if s/he had been immersed in the mikveh, an event which also recalls coming out of the womb. Is this considered true in Orthodox Judaism? I've never heard of this and of course never considered that my kids wouldn't be considered Jewish b/c I had to have a c/s...

Nope. Not true at all. I know several Orthodox women who have had c/s and there was absolutely positively no need to take a newborn to the mikeveh before his Bris, and my friend's 12yo DD has never been to the mikeveh either (and no problems with her having a Bat Mitzvah either!)

Maybe it was a mistranslation of something a rabbi wrote 100s of years ago when "coming through the birth canal" and "being born" were synonomous?

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by eilonwy The birth canal thing is important, though. If you have a c-section, even with your first baby boy, you don't need to have a Pidyon HaBen; why is that? It has something to do with "opening the path" or something like that. I can't remember, I read this stuff when I was... well, just a few weeks pp with BeanBean.

Interesting.

Does this mean that if you have a girl via c/s, then have a VBAC for a boy, you WOULD have a pidyon haben?

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by merpk I have had two miscarriages in my life past the three-month mark. One was this past May. The other was before my DS#1. It wasn't a shaila.

 

[Ruthla]

Let's see what I still need to cook for tomorrow- challah, and an apple pie (we have to use up all those apples in the fridge that are a little too soft for eating raw!)

We may make another pumpkin pie while we're at it. We made two today- one for us that's nearly gone, and one to send to my brother and SIL. I have no clue why they never call/email/visit/invite us to visit, but my parents are going there on Saturday to visit, and I wanted to send them with a homemade pie as a kind of "peace offering." I have no clue how they'll react, but I'm not comfortable picking up the phone and calling them when they're practically like strangers- it's like we have nothing to say to one another anymore. I thought DB and I would be closer since he became a parent (my nephew is a little over 2, and my SIL is due in a few weeks.) I can understand her not wanting to travel, play hostess, or have her DH and DS gone all day when she's big and pg and uncomfortable, but I still miss my brother and I wish I could get to know my nephew.

Well, anyway, I'm sending them a home-baked pie with the hopes that it opens up some kind of communication- if nothing else it will show that I'm not mad at them for anything.

Ugh, why am I up so late? Oh, right, because I was nearly asleep several times and DS kept on making too much noise and being too bouncy. And DD2 wanted to talk about book 13 in A Series of Unfortunate Events, which we finally got out of the library- she read it yesterday and I read it today. Oh, right, we were up late because I was reading when I should have been getting DS into bed so we were all overtired. And then DS was so overtired he threw up a little. All over DD!!! When it happened, I couldn't help clean up either of them until I stopped laughing! By the time both kids were clean and the sheet was changed, I just needed a break- so DD and DS snuggled together in DS' bed and I came out to the puter.

Am I an evil mom for laughing when DS vomited on DD?

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by merpk Am fascinated that my Keeper is finally easy for me (TMI alert) but am still trying to figure out how to take it out without dripping blood all over the floor. Any advice, will take it. Am fascinated, though, that at this advanced premenopausal age, and while still nursing a toddler, am still getting all this use out of the thing, which I only bought last year, along with all my relatively recently-purchased mamacloth. Barukh HaShem.

I empty it in such a way that it spills into the toilet when I remove it, then I hold it there for a few moments until it's mostly done dripping, and I toss it directly into the sink (I'm not sure what I'd do if I couldnt' reach the sink from the toilet.) If I miss any drops, I wipe them up before leaving the bathroom.

Last month I used pads because I wasn't able to walk from the toilet to the sink without my crutches. I think I had more drips on the floor and toilet seat with the pads than I normally have with the DivaCup, but that might have just been because I was clumsier than usual. Baruch Hashem I'm able to walk normally now- I still use the cane when I go out, for the extra balance, but at home I don't need to use it most of the time. I also need it sometimes for getting to the bathroom when I'm half asleep and my foot isn't awake enough to support me.

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by yonit Hi again, I am working the Great Cloth Diaper Hunt - sort of an internet scavenger hunt. And while searching on one of the sites I found this product that I thought some of you might be interested in. I know someone (Ruth??) was having a major lice problem a few months ago. I know nothing about this stuff though beyond what it says here: Nit Wit Spritz

Thanks for thinking of me, but B'H' we're past the problem. We have our own homemade spray (rosemary oil and water in a spray bottle) for lice prevention. What finally got rid of the nits was spraying vinegar on her hair, letting it soak in, washing it out, vigorous towel drying, then a quick once over with the nit comb. When I looked for nits after that, I couldn't find any.

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by rainastar i just wanted to chime in that i too am a Jewish mama!

Welcome Raina!!

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Originally Posted by Nickarolaberry I have been really researching homeschooling, this time with much more serious intent. For whatever reason i don't seem able to make that final jump, but it's finally occurred to me that I can do it, and probably better, than the school. It's that "fitting in" thing I'm having trouble with. That, and the prospect of no break from my kids at all. Not that I need 8 hours, but a couple hours each morning works for me. Otherwise getting the groceries bought and the house picked up seems like a rather insurmountable task.

Would it be possible to homeschool and still hire the babysitter for a couple of hours each day?

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by SaraFR Am I the only one that doesn't think a 2 year old ALWAYS NEEDS school?!?!?

I think that most 2yos need to be home with a primary caregiver (preferably mama.) Many 2yos can do OK in school if it's limited hours at a time and limited days a week. Very few will actually benefit from it, over and above what they could be getting at home.

IMO, most of the "benefit" 2yos get from school is that mama gets a short break a few times a week and is mentally healthier during the other 162 hours a week she's with the tot!

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by SaraFR mombh-I agree that such a little one could really still use Mommy. He would be one of the youngest in the class, turning 3 years old two months into the school year.

That's how DS was when he went into Nursury Aleph, but he was ready for it. Because of my FMS, I wasn't able to give him the kind of stimulation he needed- playing outside, going to the park and the library and the children's museum and storytime at the bookstore etc etc. It's not that he needed something from school that wasn't normally available at home, but that I was too sick to provide it for him. And I was getting sicker trying to chase after a healthy, active toddler. He was spending WAY too much time in front of the TV because I simply couldn't handle being outdoors for long and I needed more "down time" than he did.

Emotionally, he's very mature for his age and he's doing fine as the youngest in his class. IMO, he'd be bored out of his mind if he was the oldest in his class. Other kids benefit from being "held back" a year if their birthdays are right by the cutoff date. Besides his emotional maturity, I would have put him in a much shorter preschool program if I hadn't needed it as childcare.

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Originally Posted by flminivanmama davening for Yafa!

Me too!

 

[Ruthla]

Welcome Kimmie!

My understanding re: dumping milk pumped on Shabbos is as follows:

If you're pumping to releive engorgement (as I was) then set the pump on a Shabbos timer and it's recomended not to use the milk. Maybe I was told not to use the milk until after Shabbos? This was nearly 12 years ago so I don't remember all the details. Since that baby NEEDS the milk, she shouldn't have to dump it.

For Shabbos use, I either used a manual pump (which I would NOT recomend in her case because it's not as efficient at emptying the breasts and increasing milk supply) or I set the pump on a timer, to be on for half an hour every 2 hours. If you leave the pump on for 25 hours straight, you'll probably burn out the motor.

BTW, her pumping 1.5oz total is pretty good- that's likely a full feeding for her little guy. Is she giving him 3oz at a time? That seems like too much for a newborn. How often is he eating?

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by oldmama44 Hi, everyone! BS"D I'm back with good news, B"H. Yosef Chananiah was born on the 28th!

Mazel Tov!!!!

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Originally Posted by eilonwy Who was it who had the scarves? I've got PP now, but I inadvertantly deleted your PM.

That would be me.

:

Oh, I have some good news too. My SIL had a little girl Friday morning!

And my foot recovered enough to walk to shul (and back) today for the first time since I sprained my ankle. Of couse, I'm now sore and completely wiped out, but it felt good to get out today!

 

[Ruthla]

That's scary about being snowed in without power.

We got a few sprinkles this morning, but no accumulation. I'm feeling in general overwhelmed and stressed out- this big party to plan, financial woes, but I think I'll be OK. X is paying CS in installments this month because he can't pay me until he gets paid, but he still has credit left on his credit cards B'H' so he paid the chiropractor for me this month. I got my aaah-justment this morning and I feel so much better already!

Of course, I still need to deal with bouncing tuition checks- first I was pissed that they put the check through on the 28th, thinking it was Dec's check early, turns out it was Nov's check late- I had counted on "bills are paid, what's in the account is available for other bills" without double-checking the specific check had cleared, so now Nov's check bounced and Dec's check is due and I can't pay either one right now and it cost me $30 I didn't have to spare in bank fees.

So now instead of being mad at Mr. R. at the school I'm mad at myself. If I could just get an extra month's child support to keep as a cushion in my bank account I'd be allright- but I'm not sure when that's going to happen if X is barely covering his own bills and I keep getting bank fees. At least the $20 he gave me yesterday was enough to get a few groceries today so we're pretty much set if we get snowed in, and I get more food stamps on the 7th so I'll be able to shop for Shabbos.

 

[Ruthla]

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Originally Posted by mamaverdi We just had to cancel, I mean, postpone the skin biopsies.

Oh no- why?

I have to cancell some of my dr appts too- since apparently my Medicaid HMO isn't hooked up even though I supposively have Medicaid "fixed."