[ProtoLawyer]

(With apologies to Wallace Stevens. My parents are generously providing us with a crib and crib shopping is frustrating.)<br><br><br>
I<br>
Twenty billion variations<br>
Of dark-colored rectangles<br>
At all price points.<br><br><br>
II<br>
I was of three minds,<br>
Like a room<br>
In which there were three cribs.<br>
It’s not triplets, don’t even go there.<br><br>
III<br>
The rectangles march in with matching changing tables and dressers and chests and<br>
Gliders that used to be called rocking chairs.<br>
All part of the baby-industrial complex.<br><br>
IV<br>
A man and a woman<br>
become three in 40 weeks.<br>
A man and a woman and a bunch of boxes with strange Swedish-sounding names and a hex wrench become a man and a woman who are not speaking and a pile of shredded Leksvik.<br><br>
V<br>
This rectangle has a swooped back.<br>
This other rectangle has a straight back.<br>
I do not know which to prefer.<br>
Or why it even matters.<br><br>
VI<br>
Crib bedding and crib bumpers<br>
And crib pillows and crib toys filled the dark-colored rectangles<br>
In well-staged Amazon photos.<br>
The whole lot will strangle and suffocate and a newborn won’t even notice them and yet<br>
They sell these things as indispensible, indecipherably.<br><br><br><br>
VII<br>
O great marketers of the Interwebs,<br>
Why do you imagine anyone needs or wants a $20,000 crib<br>
Complete with mosquito netting that somehow is needed indoors in North America, gold-leaf edging, Cinderella’s pumpkin carriage<br>
That, granted, will be outgrown in two years, not at midnight,<br>
But still.<br><br><br>
VIII<br>
It is a damn shame<br>
That crib buying by necessity<br>
Coincides<br>
With abstinence from big, stiff drinks.<br><br><br>
IX<br>
Ooh, I like this one. Enter bid.<br>
No Buy it Now ™ link.<br>
And now it’s gone. Slow on the trigger.<br><br>
X<br>
Estimated date of delivery (crib), July 29-August 8.<br>
Estimated date of delivery (child), July 21.<br>
There better not be any assembly required.<br><br><br><br>
Make of that what you will.<br><br>
XI<br>
I can recite the rule against perpetuities, rote<br>
And in lucid, understanding terms<br>
So I know that I can bequeath the crib to the children of my child but not the children of their children’s children<br>
It will be recalled anyway.<br><br>
XII<br>
To hell with this.<br>
Maybe he can just co-sleep.<br><br><br>
XIII<br>
It was 11 a.m. all night.<br>
No sleep in that crib frustratingly chosen and assembled complete with cursing and, oh, there’s an extra part, what should we do with that? for him.<br>
He slept when I tried to show him off,<br>
In my arms, on my chest, on the bed but don’t tell the grandparents,<br>
Anywhere but in<br>
The hardwood rectangle.

 

[COgirl19]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biglaugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="laugh"> That was awesome. Doing an arm's reach co-sleeper this time and not even bothering with the whole crib stuff, co-sleeping is awesome.<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">

 

[2sweetboysmom]

that is fantastic!!!<br>
We own a crib, but it NEVER gets use before a year, and then only for naps! Co sleeping all the way<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">

 

[craft_media_hero]

hahaha! Very good!<br><br>
We are not even thinking about a crib right now. We will have a rocking bassinet next to our bed and will otherwise just sleep with the little one. Provided we all fit . . . in the California King size bed that we don't yet possess . . . which will be delivered to and assembled in the house the we do not yet own . . . so I can relate a little <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"><br><br>
Good luck, it will all work out. I was watching this birthing video from the early nineties, and they advocated that a laundry basket next to the bed would do in a pinch, as well. So just in case delivery of the crib is late or assembly IS required . . . now you know.

 

[jennica]

We have a cradle for naps and co-sleep at night. I'll hold off on a crib until we see what baby will need. I prefer co-sleeping and I'm hoping baby feels the same because we really don't have room for a crib!

 

[neonalee]

Awesome! I especially like:<br>
It is a damn shame<br>
That crib buying by necessity<br>
Coincides<br>
With abstinence from big, stiff drinks.<br><br>
We got a cosleeper on craigslist so weren't even worried about the crib yet, but Mom and her 2 sisters were soooo insistent that that's what they wanted to buy. I finally quit looking at styles and picked an 'environmentally friendly' one that got a decent rating in baby bargains (davinci kalani if anyone is interested). Then she wanted to know what mattress! How should I know?!<br><br>
Sigh. At least that's over with (and in a box upstairs). Good luck!

 

[rebeccalizzie]

I have to admit, I liked my method. Dillon's crib was recalled, and it was also Liz's crib so it was too old for the stores to give me any money for it. This is definitely going to be our last kid so we don't need high quality, we don't need the crib to match anything because we have a handed down dresser and we're planning to buy a nice matching set when he gets a normal bed, and I don't care if it becomes a bed later because we'll never have enough room for him to have a full sized bed anyway, he's going to have a twin size or possibly bunk beds.<br><br>
Therefore, I looked for the cheapest crib with halfway decent reviews on Amazon, found one that was acceptable, and clicked "buy". It was $127, came in less than a week, was easy to put together by myself (because I was excited and wouldn't wait for DH) and is perfectly decent looking.<br><br>
Apathy for the win!!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/joy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="joy"> My poor third child, I can't even be bothered to stress about his crib, LOL. I did make him a bed set to match his brother's though <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/shy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="innocent">

 

[queenofchaos]

that's freakin' hilarious! love it! i am just going with a pack and play like a i did with last baby. he hardly slept in it, just pulled it out when i needed it. didn't have to disassemble when i wanted it in another room. totally the way to go.

 

[FloridaBorn]

I found a deal on craigslist for a crib that we're going to sidecar with our bed. DH and I have a double bed so bedsharing is kind of out due to there just not being enough room.<br><br>
BTW, I did look at IKEA cribs and was not impressed (Ikea doesn't have to work hard to leave me unimpressed, though) ... it was like you might as well just put your baby in a cardboard box as flimsy as their products appeared to be in the store.

 

[expat-mama]

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>queenofchaos</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15441901"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">i am just going with a pack and play like a i did with last baby. he hardly slept in it, just pulled it out when i needed it. didn't have to disassemble when i wanted it in another room. totally the way to go.</div>
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Me too. We got a pack n play to stick in our room and it has a changing table shelf-thing attached to it. I don't see us using it much- maybe for naps? DH has big plans to stick the baby in there when we need the bed to ourselves for some nookie! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue"> It is an added bonus that it's easy to collapse and store and it has two wheels and fits through all our doors so we can wheel it around the house. AND best of all, it was 50% off at Toys R Us a couple of months ago. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">