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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
to what quantity and kind do you limit them?<br><br>
In my house, I do control what is available, though 5.5 yo dd can have anything that we have. I just try not to have anything really heinous in the house. Generally, permissible sweets are usually fruit or the health food knockoffs of popular items. I try not to give anything that comes in a wrapper from a major factory (like candy bars, etc). So homemade (or locally shop-made) muffins, cakes or cookies would be preferable to pretzels from a bag, even though the muffins would most likely have more sugar.<br><br>
But we live in a city and are out a lot where dd sees all sorts of unhealthy snacks and wants them. So while I'd ideally like to always give the "health food junk food", I can't just say no no no all the time to the evil processed stuff everyone else is eating around here. Dd is no longer satisfied with the health food junk food since her peers get the real crap. Anyway, I have been giving one sweet thing a day (sometimes wholesome, sometimes not) for the past year or so. I only do this because dd nags all day for something sweet.<br><br>
Honestly, I feel that one sweet thing a day is TOO MUCH, but I just give in because I know her friends are really eating worse stuff and in much greater quantity and I don't want it to constantly be an issue. My friend only lets her son have sweets on Saturday, whn he can fill himself up with whatever junk he wants and burn himself out. It seems to work well for their family, but I don't think it would work for us.<br><br>
So - what do you think? How much do you limit it to?
 

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I get a yen for something sweet at least once a day myself.<br><br>
I really have strong feelings about nutrition, for adults and kids. I'm very careful about what is provided at home for them, and have educated my kids about food and the different ways it effects our bodies. Because of that, when they are out, they are able to make their own decisions. They can recognize the effects of certain foods on thier body, and overall make wise choices. I think that is an important skill to teach children. As an adult I have to make those decisions every day myself. We all have days when our choices may not have been the best, but overall we have really good eating habits.<br>
I also think that children who are "too" limited (like only sweets on Saturdays seems to me) will over time become over eaters of sweets because of being over controlled. JMO
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>cmb123</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I get a yen for something sweet at least once a day myself.</div>
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This is my problem...I've got more of a sweet tooth than my son does, and he has to have a "cut" of whatever I'm having. So, if I'm going to limit his sweets, I've got to limit mine. I actually think I need to go to some sort of rehab for sugar (and I'm not entirely joking).<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>cmb123</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I really have strong feelings about nutrition, for adults and kids. I'm very careful about what is provided at home for them, and have educated my kids about food and the different ways it effects our bodies. Because of that, when they are out, they are able to make their own decisions. They can recognize the effects of certain foods on thier body, and overall make wise choices. I think that is an important skill to teach children. As an adult I have to make those decisions every day myself. We all have days when our choices may not have been the best, but overall we have really good eating habits.<br>
I also think that children who are "too" limited (like only sweets on Saturdays seems to me) will over time become over eaters of sweets because of being over controlled. JMO</div>
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I think that's probably true. My parents were very controlling with food in general, and sweets in particular. There was an elaborate punishment/reward system tied in with sweets. I can trace a lot of my compulsivity with food to that.<br><br>
My son's only 20 months old, so his making choices is not so much of a factor yet, and I have no <i>idea</i> how I'll handle peer pressure. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I agree with your approach--I'm just now trying to lay the foundation for healthy habits by providing varied and healthy meals...and from what I understand, that's really what's important. Kids who are raised with fast foods on a regular basis are going to gravitate toward that. This is a bit of a struggle for me, because I have to watch--and try to change--<i>my own</i> bad habits.
 

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I try and limit..but I suck at it.<br><br>
At this opint I use suckers when I go out alone to keep Tracy happy. I'll give him a sucker when we go shopping and he'll be fine. Other than that I try and say no.<br><br>
I'm with a pp who said limiting their child means limiting themself. That is my issue. I have the food issues in the house. I'll admit it. ut when I eat ehy want to eat. I'm starting to see the same eating habits in Tracy sometimes. He constantly asks for food. He'll eat fruit but always has to ask for fruitloops first.<br><br>
I think not taking them shopping for groceries might be a good step for me. I'll be less likely to buy thigns I think they'll like and buy more of the things they need.<br><br>
I guess I'm not helping here am I <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 

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It's not sweets, but rather the type. I try to keep a stash of healthier sweet alternatives in my bag. Sundrops is a great one. Still sugar, but a better alternative. Rapunzel's chocolate bars are a favorite. They are a big treat, like when the neighbour gives them ring pops <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"> ...I just trade them for a good chocolate bar like Rapunzel's. Organic tortilla's instead of chips. There are lots of great options. Dried fruit in a trail mix is a great one, with a variety of dried fruits. I add some organic chocolate chips and it instantly satisfies their need for sweets. If you keep these options on hand, then you won't feel like you need to settle for whatever is around.<br><br>
I hate it when the girls eat refined sugar. I hate it when they are given this stuff. I also hate saying no all the time. I think giving them an alternative is teaching them much more then saying no does.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>cjr</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I think giving them an alternative is teaching them much more then saying no does.</div>
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I limit sweets by not keeping them in the house. My theory is (and the one which my mom used) that they will have access to all that junk everywhere else and I do not need to supply it. We always have lots of fresh fruit, vegetables and yogurt on hand for snacking. I have taught them about what too much sugar will/can do to their bodies and why we do not eat a lot of it.<br><br>
If they are at a friends house and their friend is eating food I normally would not serve then they can have it. If we are having a party or they are at a party then they can have, for the most part, whatever they want. This way I feel like I am not always saying no it is just not food we normally buy.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
thanks for the feedback.<br><br>
cjr, i also buy alternative sweets but as i said dd is not as interested in them much anymore - depends on the day and which peers she's around - but we don't really have all the cool yummy organic stuff there is in the States. The health food alternatives here are a budding enterprise, and aren't that tasty, for the most part, so I can understand why they don't always thrill dd. We don't have sundrops or anything like that. It's carob-covered peanuts or molasses cookies. Corn syrup is used widely here as an alternative (for instance, corn syrup lollipops) and nobody seems to know it's a huge allergen.<br><br>
I also educate dd about nutrition, about how eating well benefits our bodies, and I talk to her about noticing her body and her emotions after various foods; she may repeat the concepts but still usually makes the most unhealthy choice! We do have the habit of eating something healthy before or with something unhealthy.<br><br>
cmb - I guess I also want something sweet about once a day, and I admit I eat my chocolate after dark. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/bag.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Bag">:
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">If they are at a friends house and their friend is eating food I normally would not serve then they can have it. If we are having a party or they are at a party then they can have, for the most part, whatever they want. This way I feel like I am not always saying no it is just not food we normally buy.</td>
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I do this to. It's usually a once a month kind of thing and I don't want them to feel resentful of healthy eating. When they go to dh's mom's then I pack some healthy snack alternatives so they won't be filling up on all junk the whole time they're there.<br><br>
sphinx - I get where you're coming from. However, it's ok to say no even when another child's mother does not. Popsicles is a big thing with my kids. The neighbour usually comes around with those sugary popsicles and what do I do? I usually say ok, but mostly because the mother has put me on the spot. Then, that's it for junk and the kids know it. The selection of healthy treats is slim. Can you do some ordering online? Rapunzel ships. <a href="http://www.tropicaltraditions.com" target="_blank">www.tropicaltraditions.com</a> ships all over the world. I'm in Canada and sometimes it sucks. I can get maple suckers which are just maple syrup. Those are great as a substitute for the other kind of suckers. Perhaps if you can get a stash of those and offer it to your dd and her peers, instead of the alternative, she won't feel left out.<br><br>
It's so hard being the oddball. I only know a handful of people who feed their kids healthy alternatives. At least I know for 2 hours every week I won't have to compete (ds's ap parent group).
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
I have no problems saying no! And I always have an alternative snack with me. But I don't want dd to have to hear "no" all the time, and I know she feels restrained and controlled sometimes, which I think could potentially be worse for her self-control in eating behaviors than just letting her have the junk. We live in a society where people offer junk food to kids as a way of greeting, so I find myself saying no far too often for my comfort level.
 

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She can have what she wants to as in quality wise <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"><br><br>
When we do our weekly groceries she can choose 1 whatever she wants.<br><br>
I limit the quantity like this: good food>bad food>>good food.<br>
Like this I am trying to make sure she doesn;t eat junk food when she is hungry.<br><br>
Sometimes she will want to eat school lunch.To me that menue to 95% is empty calories, on those days that is enough to fullfill the quota of unhealthy food in a day.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>sphinx</strong></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">thanks for the feedback.<br><br><br>
I also educate dd about nutrition, about how eating well benefits our bodies, and I talk to her about noticing her body and her emotions after various foods; she may repeat the concepts but still usually makes the most unhealthy choice! We do have the habit of eating something healthy before or with something unhealthy.</div>
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I do thatmtoo.DD had a phase of absolutely refusing eating ANY vegetables.My mom then sent her pictures of malnourished children.<br><br>
it worked <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/bag.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Bag">:
 
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