Mothering Forum banner

1 - 20 of 34 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,284 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I had this thought on the bundt pan thread, but I think it was buried in the recipes and what nots and it was really about more than bundt pans, I thought I'd post it here:<br><br>
The Bundt Pan is the perfect example of something you never use but feel like you need to keep it.<br><br>
For me, the "bundt pan" (which I probably own somewhere in my many packed goods) is something that represents the person I want to be, but am not. I want to be someone who makes wonderful cakes in pretty bundt pans. But I never have. So I keep the bundt pan hoping I will be that person.<br><br>
Maybe I should say to myself: WHEN I am that person and when I want to bake something in a bundt pan, I give myself liberty to just go right out and buy one, that minute, without worrying about how much money I've wasted by getting rid of the one I had and buying one at the last minute. Its probably a very small price to pay for the freedom of not keeping all the "Bundt Pans" in my life. There are so many things I keep because I hope I will be the type of person that will use them. I might someday be that person for one or two of the items, and yes I'll go buy another one, but considering how much I'll gain by not being weighed down by the others. I need to give myself the freedom to let go of the rest.<br><br>
I also think all the "Bundt Pan"s weigh us down mentally. Every time I see it I am reminded that I am not the type of person who cooks bundt cakes, though I want to be. It's almost like a criticism in physical form. I need to let go of that, I do not want to be reminded that I am not the person I think I want to be on a regular basis and be free to be who I am.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,908 Posts
One person's Bundt pan is another person's watercolor set (or whatever), right?<br>
There may be things in our homes that we haven't taken the time to find out if they really might be a nice part of our lives- or if they are destined to enhance someone else's life. Set up a time to give whatever it is a few tries- or let it go now.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,220 Posts
Umm, lets see,<br>
my bread machine<br>
my sewing machine<br>
my guitar<br>
I am not sure when I will ever get to making my bread everyday, and really if I am not doing it with a bread machine, am I ever going to do it by hand?<br>
I am really good at pretending I can sew, but I can't.<br>
And that guitar. I so wish I could teach myself to play, or have time for lessons. But I have to be honest with myself and know that with kids and how young they are it isn't going to happen anytime soon. The biggest thing, is that I can let go of these things. But my dh can't see to let go of them when I will want them back one day. My life is kinda on hold right now, I am fine with that. But he doesn't see why it needs to be that way. I have my few things, like yarn crafts, reading, things that are very non stressful that I do in my free time. I have quite a few bundt pans I guess.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,076 Posts
i know what you mean by this. here are two thoughts that i had recently about items i struggle to let go off:<br><br>
"would i buy it today?" meaning, do i really like this enough that if i spotted it today, would i buy it?<br><br>
"can i get this, again if i need it?" the bundt pan would be a great example. i could get one of those for free on freecycle or for 25 cents at a thrift store or just borrow one from the neighbor for that special cake. KWIM?<br><br>
part of letting go of "future use" items or sentimental items for me is part of not living in the present. i need to live in the present and be here now. not worrying about where i will hopefully be in a year (master seamstress) or where i was 8 years ago (fitting into clothes that i have no business wearing now b/c i would have to stop eating, again). just my thoughts. thanks!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10,284 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
To me the items I'm thinking of were never used. I think of the bundt pan differently from say my scrapbooking stuff. I haven't scrapbooked in years, but I want to get back to it - but it is a part of who I am. The bundt pan is more like a dream of who I could be - not a real focus or even hobby - I am not a big cook.<br><br>
Hmm, trying to think of what else I have like that. Since we moved and have been slowly unpacking, most of that sort of stuff is probably still packed away. I did get rid of a lot of it in the move - backpacking gear, climbing equipment. I think my bike probably qualifies - I've owned it only 10 years now and ridden it all of once.... but I really want to be that person... heh!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,755 Posts
Hehe. The bundt pans of life. I love it.<br><br>
Mine are the business-style clothes (for the sahm who has only ever worked retail, or waitressed in a uniform)<br>
Many shades of make-up (You can tell I'm feeling 'up' if I wear a tiny bit once a week)<br>
Sewing projects/fabric-I've been 'planning to learn' for something like a decade now <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br>
Art supplies. Pretty colored pencils, different kinds of paper, ribbon, stickers, etc..<br><br><br>
No matter how often I declutter, how ruthless I am and get rid of it all, these are the things that inevitably creep back into my life. Some of us want to be the next Martha with fancy cakes, some of us aspire to wonderful hand made creations (while looking very put together in snappy clothes) <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink">
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,417 Posts
I just threw a MamaBlessing for my best friend and tore the house apart trying to find my "bundt pans" like beading supplies and stamping stuff/art supplies. I actually used the stuff! It was great being able to make it work with what I had without having to run to another store. I love it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
589 Posts
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>mightymoo</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7268517"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I also think all the "Bundt Pan"s weigh us down mentally. Every time I see it I am reminded that I am not the type of person who cooks bundt cakes, though I want to be. It's almost like a criticism in physical form. I need to let go of that, I do not want to be reminded that I am not the person I think I want to be on a regular basis and be free to be who I am.</div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
This is poetic, MM. It really hit home for me. There are many things in my home (despite the great decluttering rampage of '07) that totally fit this bill ... there's the Waterford water pitcher, the fancy black sweater with the furry neck ... the size 14 jeans I haven't been able to wear since my wedding ... you get the idea. You *really* get the idea!!<br><br>
Thanks for the fabulous insight, Momma!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
6,099 Posts
Wow great post. I have such a hard time letting go.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
807 Posts
That's a really great way to express it. I read a similar idea several years in a book. The author talked about letting go of all of the ghosts of the past.<br><br>
A few weeks ago, I got rid of the two bikes that had been haunting me since I purchased them 4 years ago. It's so nice to pull into my carport and not have them glaring at me.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
424 Posts
What an interesting thread, and a very poetic and freeing thought MM. Not to toss a cog in the wheel but, why not bake a cake and donate it along with a recipe, then send that pan on its way. Then you will be the woman who made a bundt cake in a wonderful pan and moved on to better things.<br><br><br>
I should add that I have done this recently, I found a beautiful sweater that I adore but never wear, I put it on... for the day. Pranced around feeling fab. in my Diva Attire. Then I gingerly folded my loved and neglected garmet. I passed it on to another. SIlly, I now but it made parting a little easier.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,984 Posts
This was very helpful to me (in my e-mail box from another thread):<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">browneyedsol has just replied to a thread you have subscribed to entitled - Feng Shui (includes links to old threads!) - in the Spirituality forum of MotheringDotCommune Forums.<br><br>
This thread is located at:<br><a href="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/showthread.php?t=88178&goto=newpost" target="_blank">http://www.mothering.com/discussions...8&goto=newpost</a><br><br>
Here is the message that has just been posted:<br>
***************<br>
I cross posted this to Treasure Mapping, as I brought up the issue of letting go of clutter and grief. I picked up a Natural Home magazine today at the co-op. There's a great little article in here. Ask and you shall receive! This is what I needed today. The article title is: 3 Steps to Clutter Free Living by Misty McNally. I'm usually pretty skeptical about simple step by step things, but this little article works for me. I'm absolutely clear that what people are looking for, definitely including me, is meaning--and not stuff. So, here's what really resonated with me about why it is so hard to get rid of stuff:<br><br><b>"An awful lot of the stuff we have-and I'm not talking about one or two things, I'm talking about 50 percent--we literally never use and are never planning to use again, but can't let go of. *They are basically objects in which we've invested dreams that didn't happen.* It's very difficult to let go of the dreams, even though we know that they didn't actually bring us the satisfaction we were hoping for."</b><br><br>
This helps me better understand my grief process as I sit at the shredder and bag the excess in my house for letting go. Hope it helps someone here</td>
</tr></table></div>
That quote encouraged me to LET GO (give away to a Doula friend who is using it as part of her lending library) of a huge pile of Pregnancy Books. I have a dream of opening up a Pregnancy Support place, but I'm not close to being ready to actually work on it. So it was kind of a painful reminder of being a "failure" without even trying (I am afraid to try).<br><br>
I told myself when I want to have it (a lending library) I can and will get it all back, without problems.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,355 Posts
Thank you so much for starting this thread! Very wise and wonderful insight.<br><br>
I'd like to add a thought... Sometimes the bundt cake pans can take up so much space that you leave no room to allow other parts of you to grow. Releasing the 'should be' can provide the clarity needed to see what really <i>could</i> be. Perhaps you are meant to be a woman that makes muffins! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin"><br><br>
Off to let go of some of my own bundt pans...
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
9,821 Posts
What a great thread! Lots to think about.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
349 Posts
<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Lilacmoon</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7270927"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">What an interesting thread, and a very poetic and freeing thought MM. Not to toss a cog in the wheel but, why not bake a cake and donate it along with a recipe, then send that pan on its way. Then you will be the woman who made a bundt cake in a wonderful pan and moved on to better things.<br><br><br>
I should add that I have done this recently, I found a beautiful sweater that I adore but never wear, I put it on... for the day. Pranced around feeling fab. in my Diva Attire. Then I gingerly folded my loved and neglected garmet. I passed it on to another. SIlly, I now but it made parting a little easier.</div>
</td>
</tr></table></div>
What a great idea <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> Sort of showing yourself yes I could be this person if I chose to. What a great concept.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,511 Posts
This is a wonderful thread, what great insight. I've been working hard on accepting the same thing and getting rid of that my "bundt pans." It's very difficult! This totally sums up my thinking on it:<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">Maybe I should say to myself: WHEN I am that person and when I want to bake something in a bundt pan, I give myself liberty to just go right out and buy one, that minute, without worrying about how much money I've wasted by getting rid of the one I had and buying one at the last minute.</td>
</tr></table></div>
I call it stuff karma. Either it will find its way back to me when I need it, or I'll be allowed to go buy it.<br><br>
On a side note, though, I bake all my cakes in my bundt pan because it's just easier, I think <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> I find them easier to frost that way. Maybe I need to release my layer cake pans instead <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/dizzy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Dizzy">:
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
15,225 Posts
<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"><br><br>
Bundt pan aside <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">, I recently gave away a box of plastic summer entertaining stuff that had been given to me for years from my sisters. Big plastic trays, bowls shaped like shells. Now, I love in Buffalo, not Hawaii. We entertain in the summer, but not big splashy parties... usually the kids b day parties. The plastic serverware made me me feel that I was expected to throw these kinds of parties that would warrant such items. They take up a lot of room, I don't like plastic very much and I had *never* used them. My family will just have to eat chips from baskets as we've always done. It was freeing to let them go.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
972 Posts
What a great post!<br><br>
How often the 'bundt pans' in our life do take up our physical space but also load us down emotionally!<br><br><i>Funny thing I got rid of my bundt pan and springform pans last year as I finally realized I just wouldn't get around to using them.</i> Now my juicer that's another thing, it sounded great and yet it was so hard to clean but I hate to pass it on after spending so much on it! I think I'll sell it through the local buy and sell magazine. That way I'll benefit financially for my efforts! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
It's been a slow process but I am trying to weed our house of unneeded things bit by bit. Some times I am not ready to part with a certain object so instead of dwelling on it I focus on what I am ready to pass on.<br><br>
I am getting there! It feels great to have our home more organized. It opens up the possibilities and makes our life <i>so much easier!</i>
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
104 Posts
I, too, have been working hard to release my "bundt pans". It is not easy to do, especially without support from my DH, but I am persevering anyway.<br><br>
I have been passing by certain items in my home to because I am not quite ready to release them, but it is getting easier. I freecycled a big (3 ft. long) , soft adorable stuffed cow yesterday that I was saving because: a) it was so cute b)one of my kids might want a farm theme in their bedroom someday. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment"> I feel so much better now that I passed it on to a lady who collects cows and will love it. Much better than being packed in box for 5 years waiting!<br><br>
I want to be free now!
 
1 - 20 of 34 Posts
Top