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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
Hi everyone. Tomorrow is my 40 weeks, so today I decided to go to a local NY hospital that an obgyn referred to us for an ultrasound/sonogram to check the baby's weight and position upon our request. The obygyn has consisted monitoring our baby's heart rate and was always around 135+. At the hospital, the front desk first refused us b/c we were not on time, then we told them we're due tomorrow, they changed their tune and so gave us a spot. Then a nurse checked the heart rate and wouldn't tell us the rate while I was laying on my back. It sounded like the normal 130 range. She then tells me to lie on my left side which no obgyn has ever done to measure my baby's heart rate. She puts probe like up near by rib, which didn't seem right to me and out of nowhere picks up her pager phone and talks to an on call dr that baby heart rate dropped to 55. So my husband was like check again b/c most recently we recalled it was 130, and to have me lay on my back again. That's when she poked around and confirmed it was around 130. The nurse still pressured me to go L & D to strap on a fetal monitor and told me I couldn't walk and be on a wheelchair. Coincidentally there happened to be an Asian nurse who popped out with a wheelchair, probably thinking I might need translation help if I didn't know English as an Asian woman. As she wheeled me in, my husband started interrogating her and asking why we need to go there and she kept avoiding the answer. Then she slipped and said i'll be monitored and we might deliver today. That's when my husband said no, and I also looked into his eyes and begged him to not let me go in. It was so calculated with these hospital tactics. As we headed to the elevator, a swarm of on call dr, nurses tried to prevent us from taking off. I started to tear and sob as a fight and flight response b/c of how terrifying it was. They kept saying stuff like what will happen to my baby if I don't get monitored. We have been to several obgyns who told us baby was healthy, low risk pregnancy. All along we wanted a water birth at home, so we simply wanted to see how much the baby weighed. I am shocked at how I couldn't trust the hospital staff, how awful they talked to us to get us to stay. And once I didn't comply, told us what will happen to our baby. We told them we wanted to go to another hospital and they continued to pressure us. The elevator seemed to take forever to come, and once it arrived, my husband shoved the on call doctor for what he said about our baby. This incident confirmed that there is no way I am going to birth at a hospital except necessary and that no matter how difficult having a natural birth at home is, I would not succumb myself to the hospital's hands. They saw me like a spring chicken, ready to pop, first pregnancy, healthy. I wasn't even dilating or going into labor. They probably would have used pitocin, epidural, what not, and wanted to get all that to claim our insurance $. I researched and read that the hospital uses the fetal heart drop as a tactic all the time and is so common. It's heartbreaking that I couldn't trust a hospital in the U S of A. Thanks for the support and place for me to share this. Happy that we escaped. We have a fetal doppler at home and we kept measuring the heart beat and it was bet 134-141 entire time. They tried to trick us and didn't work. This incident has helped me grow, to trust my body, and to love myself, and to educate yourself.
 

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so sorry that happened to you! Hugs to you. that is really mean of them! There are so many people in power positions these days who abuse their power and act mean to people in vulnerable situations. Glad you were able to get home. Hope you are feeling okay.
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thanks what got to me was the doctor tried to terrorize with the "baby might die" phrase. Something not want to hear at this stage. How can I get over that phrase that keeps playing over and over again?
 

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Stay strong Summerbaby2015! It is terrible how they treated you, thank goodness you were educated and level headed enough to see through their "standard" of care. Try to get out and walk around, relieve any tensions, write/vent about it, so that you are more emotionally recovered for when your baby does decide to come.

I'm so sorry you were treated that way. Remember no one can force to do anything. And often times the normal procedures have more to do with administrative practices rather than the best possible outcome. It is unfortunate that they treat people so horribly especially when you disagree or when u have questions. Just think of it as their normal work day, they are not aware of how or why this is so upsetting or why someone would question it. Which is terribly insulated thinking.

Pregnancy was the first time for me to come face to face with the paternalistic medical attitude I was previously unaware of.

Follow your gut and don't feel bad about disagreeing.

Good Luck!
 

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Do you have a better Dr. or Midwife or Doula? I often called my doula after appointments to discuss disturbing actions or words the hospital did during prenatal care. It was extremely helpful because she was very educated and had the research to back up her positions (which disagreed with the hospital's choices).

Trust yourself - your baby is safe and healthy. Continue taking the heartbeat, but don't torture yourself over it. Try to find a way to find the inner strength to move beyond the hospital's comments. Educate yourself - research heart beat from different angles, find out if that means anything or what false positives in low rates could occur, at your next appointment bring these up to your Dr./midwife.

Also - make sure you file a complaint. They need to be aware of how this is affecting their patients. Be sure to explain both the ultra sound and the comments doctors made.
 

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This is why I don't trust hospitals. They put the pressure on and for me its sort of a scary place. I don't feel that my, (or baby's) welfare is primary.
 

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They are totally opportunistic. I am glad I read this, I too recently ran out of a hospital at 32 weeks, I got my leg injured and had a spasm but they wouldn't treat anything but the pregnancy... told me to get undressed and put on a gown and they were gonna do fetal monitoring. I was like, I hurt my leg, and why do I need to be in a gown? They decided I could keep my clothes on, but the routines rubbed me the wrong way and I bolted out of there, like Im.... leaving!!!
Thanks for sharing, and remember, showing up to the hospital at 40 weeks... they are gonna think your "due" which is stupid cuz it's an average. As many women deliver at 38 as 42... and now we act like it's either scary, or must be permitted to "go over" 40 weeks.
Good luck to you. Good job today.
 
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