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Discussion Starter #1
I have b/g twins that are 3 1/2. They have yet to attend preschool. We plan on going to preschool part time when they are 4+ years old. I am looking into elementary schools and am so confused by what to do.<br><br>
I know that I want them to be in kindergarten together. But what happens if they go to a school that is small and only has 1 class per grade? They/ we will not have the option to seperate them if needed. Or am I freaking out about nothing? We are looking at a wide range of schools (huge public school, Spanish immersion school with multiple classes, to small Catholic schools). Obviously, we want the best possible education that we can afford and feel comfortable with.<br><br>
Anyone have kids in elementary school and have kept them together?? Thoughts?
 

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My children are the same age as yours but I taught in a one room school for a few years and we had a set of b/g twins in our class, as well as several sets of different age siblings. Everyone was fine.<br><br>
One thing I hear people go on and on about is, "What if one twin is doing better than the other academically? They shouldn't be together in the same class or the twin performing at a lower level will have problems/issues/be upset/whatever." My thought, though, is they're TWINS and likely share most (all?) other aspects of their lives. They'll figure out that one is "ahead" of the other, keeping them separate is not going to prevent that. In the case of the children we had in our class, the girl could read anything you put in front of her and her brother struggled. Oh did he struggle! They had a very AP family (looking back on it, this was before children for me) and had homeschooled earlier in their education so they just sort of took what each did as what they did (excuse me not making much sense, I've just risen) and went about their business.<br><br>
As far as social areas were concerned, we had siblings (the set of twins included) who would sometimes choose to play together and sometimes who would go do their own thing. I definitely saw more separation by personal choice in the twins as they got older (2nd-3rd grade).<br><br>
I'm not sure if this helps at all or not, but I think most situations will work out for you one way or the other and I wouldn't stress about it too much other than the quality of the school. If a school is small but high quality, they will take care of the twin situation without problems.<br><br>
For whatever it's worth, the preschool we're looking at for next year has twenty children in attendance at a time and have had many sets of twins. They said that they keep everyone together for the first hour of the day and then break into two groups. For the first month or so, they keep all the twin pairs together. After that they try rearranging things and breaking them up. If things go well, they leave it, if things don't go so well, they put them back together. They also consult the parents on the togetherness issue. Thinking about this reminds me that at the one room school I was mentioning earlier, we divided the children into all sorts of groups so all of our sibling sets had a chance to be together and work apart.<br><br>
I think the one thing I would be really leery of is a school that has a set in stone policy on how they handle the placement of twins.<br><br>
Good luck and happy school shopping!
 

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Dh and I have had this conversation several times. Since he is a twin I wanted to know what he thought the "right" thing to do was.<br><br>
In his opinion there is no right answer. Know your individual kids. Be ready to fight schools *either* way if their "policy" isn't what's right for your kids at the moment.<br><br>
good luck!<br><br>
-Angela
 

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We are starting to get on waiting lists for preschools, and this has come up in conversation.<br><br>
My preference is to keep them together unless it becomes a problem and it affecting their learning or social development.
 

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I kept mine together in preschool. At ages 2 & 3, I thought I would never want them separated. At 4, they <span style="text-decoration:underline;">asked</span> to be separated, but I didn't do it since one of them would have to be moved from their class of friends. They started K this year in different classes and were very excited to be on their own. They see each other throughout the day, during "centers," playground and lunch. It's perfect. They're good buddies, but I think it's important to give them their own lives, too. In fact, today one of them is going to a birthday party alone. He's VERY excited to be able to do this without his brother. (Brother gets a reward with Dad, since he isn't going to the party.)<br><br>
I'm sure there are twins who need each other quite a bit and shouldn't be separated, but our experience is that it's the right thing.<br><br>
Best of luck with your decision.
 

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My twin girls are different that at preschool they usually run off in two different directions. or they play side by side without a problem. most people dont really know they are twins, they dont need eachother but they do like eachother. Preschool will be the only time i have to deal with this since we homeschool but i think i would try and keep them together more out of convienience then anything. Trying to figure out two different teachers, having two sets of homework, programs, and so on does not sound fun for the parent.
 

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i would leave it up to your kids. my sister and i were seperated and we hated it. it hurt our relationship for a long time too.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
I am so confused on what to do about this situation b/c it really impacts the schools that we are considering. We may choose a smaller Catholic school that only has one class per grade. I know my son is okay without his sister as long as he knows she is "okay." My daughter is very clingy and I think she would feel lost in a big school. In general when we have playgroups my son usually goes off with the other kids or plays independently and my daughter clings to my side until she feel secure (about 30 minutes before our play session is about to end) and then decides to interact with everyone. We will start preschool at about 4 yo (in the fall) and I guess I will see what happens then.<br>
Keep the advice coming. Thanks.
 

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Mine were together until 1st grade. I was not keen on them being separated at that point but it turned out to be the best thing for them. They're in 7th grade this year & for the first time since Kg they actually have a class together.
 
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