[maisiedotes]

I have greatly appreciated gifts we have gotten for the baby. We have gotten some adorable organic cotton gift sets, some really cute little onesies, etc. My SIL, who loves pink and dresses her girls in frilly pink dresses, etc (which is NOT ME at all) gave us a bunch of onesies from Old Navy. When she gave us the bag she said "I know you don't like pink but these were so cute..." everything in there was pink except one really cute brown onesie with a zebra on it, but it says "stripes are slimming" on it.

I don't know why it bothers me, but I do NOT want to dress my child in clothes that say "daddy's little princess" or anything with Cinderella on it. It irks me.

: I feel like a complete beeyotch. I know pink clothes are going to keep coming our way from all directions. So, do I keep this stuff, or what? She spent quite a bit on it all- probably about $50, which is alot for things the baby is not going to wear. Should I just chill out and dress her in them when we are going to see my SIL, and have her wear them around the house?

Does anyone else have a problem with clothes like this? And the "stripes are slimming"... well, that just goes against everything I believe in. Any thoughts?

 

[AimeeandBrian]

Pink is my favourite color, so I don't have that big a problem with it. I do not like the frilly outfits people will probably get though. I like natural materials, and so the polyester pink stuff will be going back to the store.
I am trying not to buy too much pink myself, so she will have a well rounded wardrobe.
I'm okay with the zebra thing, but I wouldn't buy it myself.

 

[myjulybabes]

I looooove pink, but I hate the goofy sayings too. "Stripes are slimming"?? That's just...ew. I think that's worse than the one my dad's gf got for my little one that says "I have expensive taste."

Are they new? Can you return some? I'd keep some, and return some and if she asks just tell her you had too much in that size or something.

 

[maisiedotes]

Quote:

Originally Posted by myjulybabes I looooove pink, but I hate the goofy sayings too. "Stripes are slimming"?? That's just...ew. I think that's worse than the one my dad's gf got for my little one that says "I have expensive taste." Are they new? Can you return some? I'd keep some, and return some and if she asks just tell her you had too much in that size or something.

Hmm. I think I may be able to return them- she left the prices on and some of them are clearance though. Do you know if Old Navy takes returns on clearance items? If so, some of them will be going back to the store so fast....

:

 

[wwisdomskr]

You are not alone, Mama. We have firmly stood our ground with our daughters. It has made a lot of people angry...but, oh well.

I personally think that it DOES matter...

We just donate the stuff or take it back.

(I always invite people to try a little experiment: dress your baby stereotypically both ways and then listen very carefully to how people speak to your baby. It will BLOW YOUR MIND.)

I don't dress my dds like boys, btw. I dress them like children.

Don't be afraid to stand your ground. But, also, don't let people have the power to upset you. Just say thank you and go about your business. People buy baby clothes for THEIR own pleasure, not yours.

 

[maisiedotes]

The good thing is, my SIL lives 3 hours away and when she sees the baby, chances are she (the baby) will only be wearing 2 outfits that day, TOPS. I can easily pick out 2 that don't gag me and my SIL will be none the wiser. I think I may be making a trip to Old Navy tomorrow to swap the pink stuff in for some green stuff...

 

[Ackray]

I wouldn't give them away or sell them yet. People are going to give you all kinds of stuff that you don't want. There is nothing you can do about it and it's going to continue for as long as it takes your child to grow up. I'd save it for now so you don't hurt anyone's feelings or cause family wars, not use it and give it away when it wouldn't fit your baby anymore. Or you never know when you're going to run out of clean clothes that you like and need to put something ugly on your baby.

I'd keep everything you get for now. It's not a big deal.

 

[melissakc]

I totally, wholeheartedly agree with Jessica. It is your child and you have every right to dress her however you see fit. There are lots of excuses you can make if your SIL asks about the clothes she bought--they're in the laundry, they didn't fit and they had to be exchanged, she's already outgrown them, she threw up on it and you were too grossed out to wash it, she had a diaper blowout and you threw it away, etc., etc., etc. There is no way in heck I would ever put "Stripes are slimming" on my daughter. Body image issues for newborns.... Sorry, but I tend to lose my sense of humor over that kind of garbage. If she asked me about that one, I think I would come out and tell her that one of my big goals as a mother of a girl is to raise her with a healthy body image, so I didn't think the onesie was appropriate.

As far as the pink goes, that happened to me too. I got ALL PINK as gifts from everyone except my best friend, who understands such things. I just made sure that everything I bought was NOT pink so it balanced out. I made a point to mention it to my family and people close to me, in an off-hand way, so at least they would stop doing it. Like while I'm shopping, I'll complain that all there is for girls is pink and flowers, how annoying, I get so sick of pink, pink, pink.... Once she is out of the newborn clothes you probably won't be getting nearly as many gifts, so, for me at least, this was primarily a newborn problem.

 

[mittendrin]

Considering she knows how you feel about that type of clothing I don't think it's any more offensive of you to return the stuff than of her to give it to you in the first place. It irks me how people give things and act all generous knowing exactly it's not the taste of the parents. My sis is like that. We've had plenty of fights over that. i am not too picky about clothes for the kids but I am with toys. Yet she keeps buying the cheapo Walmart crap and expects me to be thankful. It probably isn't an issue when you don't depend on the gifts, kwim? When you have 3 showers and it's all for fun and "Aaaawws" and "Ooooos" anyways. But a lot of moms don't have plenty of money to spend on fun babystuff and if you give them anything it should be something they requested/need. Giving is not about satisfying your ego it's about fulfilling someone's needs and wants. Otherwise it's just selfish and then I wouldn't think twice about returning the gift.

 

[maisiedotes]

Thank you for the replies! Do any of you know what I can say to people that means "I HATE PINK"? I would love to put something on our registry in the "notes" section that gently says that... then again, people seem to buy what they want and not what we want! Maybe I can have my mom spread the word... and the girls at work are throwing me a shower so I will have DH mention it to them.

My aunt is not a fan of pink either and everyone was commenting on what a monster she is that she won't let her child wear pink.

:

 

[sorteep]

I like the "keep a few for "show" and xchg the rest".. Old NAvy is good about returns BUT w/o a gift recipt (even with tags on) you will only get the lowest price (not necc what she actually paid for them) soooo if you have no reciopt RUN and return ASAP B4 it all goes on sale..

you could put on your reg "gender neutral" for colors, or in the notation sec you could specifically note "we LOVE earth tones" or "babies look adorable in primary colors!" or something more positive and HOPE everyone gets the hint... if you are really blunt you could even go so far as to say "pls no Pink!!!" depends on your family style..

unfortunately it is too late to vault the sex in order to insure GN colors B4 birth but after you would drown in pink anyway... sigh

I have to (guiltily) admit I did it to my sis and got a good bit of light pink when her DD was born and I sorta knew she was not a pink fan.. I did apologize upon giving and did offer to xchg .. the purchases were DEFINITELY more for me!! (she was NOT in a "need" the gifts position.. like... so far from "need" like think warren Buffett/ Bill Gates ,but not quite, league..)anyway, it happens

Take a page from Emily Post, thank gracefully and do what you want with the gifts..

 

[Momma Aimee]

kinda hopeing for some pink here

shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i did NOT say that

but

Quote:

Does anyone else have a problem with clothes like this? And the "stripes are slimming"... well, that just goes against everything I believe in. Any thoughts?

i find that wrong, and would not use it, cuz you are getting into the body image stuff, the thin is best and

THAT I will not do.

I will not do any of the slogans stuff that promote bad behavior as cute "I make the rules" on a oneis is one thing, on a shirt for a 4 year old is IMO another. "you didn't see me do it" and all the other things that you see out for the perschool and school age set are NO gos for our family as a whole (all the DN and DN included -- we sisters stand together on this one)

oops sorry ....

... that wasn't the discussion way it?

Pink gets old .... and i do enjoy the really cute, really girl, non-pink things more than MOST, not all, pink stuff. it is liek pink is lazy -- ok it is a girl, dress her in pink, no effert .. but the baby clothing tha tis really girlly without being all pink -- that is really cute and thatis what i love.

but i am not opposed to most pink.

However, i am opposed to babies and children being small adults. "strips are slimming" is not appropritate for a baby or tot or pre-schooler or a gradeschooler .... now i guess if a MS or HS wanted to wear it and it was a ccute enough tee i would allow it, maybe, at least consider it.

 

[Isaac'sMa]

No, you're not overreacting!

Personally I'd keep one or two outfits you can stomach and wear them "for show" when you see SIL. Take the rest back ASAP so that you can actually return it and get something you like.

It's really about what you like anyway and the values you want to instill in your daughter (yes, starting before she can read what a shirt says on it!). If you don't want her to wear any of it, take it *all* back! No guilt allowed!

I don't mind a little pink, but the stuff that says "little princess", "I'm the boss", "stripes are slimming" etc. is offensive to me...although if she's the princess, well, wouldn't that make you the queen?!

 

[Momma Aimee]

Quote:

I don't mind a little pink, but the stuff that says "little princess", "I'm the boss", "stripes are slimming" etc. is offensive to me...although if she's the princess, well, wouldn't that make you the queen?!

I did see matching shirts one time, a oneis say Price or Princess and the mom shirt said QUEEN.

I guess i don't have as much of an issue with the princess and prince stuff -- as i do with some of the other stuff.

I mean, i played princess when i was little -- and i followed Princess Di like a stalker ........... and i am not Brinttney or Lindsey NOW ... so i think it is a pretty safe thing.....all things in moderation

 

[BabyBugsMom]

This is your baby. Your sil can dress her child however she choses; it's your perogative to do the same.

Old Navy is great about returns, but things go on sale all the time, so if you don't have a gift reciept get over there TODAY.

 

[renaissanceed]

We have tried to avoid too much pink for DD, but it does seem to be a favourite of the great-aunts. Since she actually doesn't get too much in the way of pressies and I don't buy too much in the way of clothes, she does wear the pink stuff (fortunately usually not too frilly), especially if going to see the great-aunts.

I do draw the line at some sayings, like the one you got about stripes are slimming - that is awful IMO! We have gotten a few little sweatsuits outfits with stuff written on the bum - we keep the sweater and give away the pants - especially the one that said something about a bunny!

DD took all her sweaters out of her drawer last night before bed and I was actually looking them over and noting with pleasure how many were GN and would do for the next baby regardless of whether it be a girl or a boy.

However, she has now developed preferences and wants to dress in purple almost all the time, in orange some of the time (although we have very little in the way of orange clothes) and in pink if all else fails. So I only give her the choice of clothes on some days so she does sometimes wear the non-girly clothes.

 

[LittleBrownDog]

I'm in the "keep some, return the rest" camp. Keep the most basic basic plain onesies- You're going to get So much pink, at some point a plain pink onesie will come in handy. But the "Stripes are Slimming" thing? *gag* We also don't do the princess/sparkly/teenybopper stuff. DD, at nearly 3, is starting to get into the pink princess stuff at this point, but we indulge it with more "imagination" stuff- fairy skirts, magic wands, etc. And we're careful to balance it with more non-girly play.

As far as the registry- Could you say something about how this might not be your last baby and you'd like to re-use as much as possible, so please don't go too girly? That's what we did the first time and it seemed to work for the most part. There will, of course, be those people who are bound and determined to get the frilliest pinkiest things they can find. All you can do in those cases is hope for a gift receipt!

 

[Kontessa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by wwisdomskr People buy baby clothes for THEIR own pleasure, not yours.

And this is why I would not return it all. LOL I would keep a few things so the people who care enough to even gift (In my world you have no idea how rare this even is) get a little joy from seeing something they picked for little baby. We all have different tastes.

The other night at choir one of the babies had on these very cool pokadoted fall colors pants and I just loved. So very much not frilly like the other baby in the room was dressed. I think it really did make a difference how adults reacted to the babies. The little pants girl got passed around more and the frilly babys mother kept her in her stoller with noisy toys.... she is only 9 months old!

Anyway..... We should not live out of guilt I think so do what ever is in you to do. I would personally keep a few but that is because I like to help make others smile that I care about and I can dress baby how I wish many other times!

Blessings,
Kimmy

P.S. I am still hunting BLACK baby cloths!

 

[maclolo]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Momma Aimee I will not do any of the slogans stuff that promote bad behavior as cute "I make the rules" on a oneis is one thing, on a shirt for a 4 year old is IMO another. "you didn't see me do it" and all the other things that you see out for the perschool and school age set are NO gos for our family as a whole.

Yes, oh my goodness, I hate those shirts that promote disrespect!!

As for the exchange..... Personally, I would exchange anything that I couldn't imagine having my DC wear... that way, your SIL's gift would be put to use and you will have fewer things to purchase/more to dress your DD in! We got quite a few clothes for DS that he never ended up wearing because I wasn't crazy about them and there was always something clean/cuter that I preferred to put him in.

 

[melissakc]

I think you could put a note on your registry saying, "We prefer gender neutral colors," and if anyone asks why you can say you'd like to be able to reuse the clothes for a second child (if that is something you even want to bring up!). That's what I told people.

Or just put "Pink makes me puke!" JK.