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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm looking for a support thread for Mammas who were trying for a home birth and had to have a cesarian. My DD is 5mo now and I am finding peace with our birth. I'm greatfull we are alive anyways! Sometimes it is still difficult though. I understand Buddha was a cesarian...
 

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i also wanted to home birth but ended up needing a section. it makes me wonder what it would have been like if everything had been ok. instead my labor and birth experience was the opposite of what i expected and wanted. then again it was my first so it makes me wonder if maybe my expectations were off to begin with.
nonetheless i'm glad i could have a section. if i had been in another time or place where i couldn't have had a section my ds would have surely died and i probably would have too.
now that i'm expecting again it brings up lots of uncertainties and worries but maybe that should be a different thread?
 

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my last son was supposed to be a natural birth in the hospital like all his brothers, until the dr checked my dilation and i heard "uh oh". little froggie was full breech, and he'd been head down just 2 days earlier. my dr kept saying he had a bad feeling about it all, and talked me into a c-section. i was less than thrilled, but the baby's heartrate was dropping and off to the operating room we went. turned out the dr's feeling was right on, the cord was twisted around his neck and body in such a way that it might well have hurt him or worse if the dr had let me continue naturally.

even knowing that agreeing to the c-section saved my boy from going to nicu, if not actually saving his life, it still took me a long time to get over the disappointment and feelings of failure for not being able to go naturally.

to you, mamas.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Yeah, I am defonitly gratefull. A hundred or so years ago, both DD & I would be dead. It's still not a easy thing to come to terms with though, early on I was almost angry about it, almost like I felt that nature should take it's course, but also angry that something like that could be natures course. I think it's easy to forget how many women used to die in childbirth. I have a new found respect for modern technologies though. And I really am very grateful.
I really had not even let the thought of going into the hospital cross my mind during my whole pregnancy, it just seemed like a rediculous imposibility to me. I'm glad my MW's were so gentle & tactfull with me though. I think under normal "you need a c-section now" circumstances, I probly would have turned into quite an ugly beast. As it was I still cussed out the Dr. (who, God bless him, was really only beeing the hero that gave up his sunday night to save our lives,) and cryed, screamed & carried on at the nursing staff. I have to say that the moment of finding acceptance to say OK to a c-section, was probly the most dificult thing I have ever done. 3 days of labor? That was easy compared to this! A cakewalk! Anyways, I am glad that everything worked out the way it did in the end, and the hospital staff was very understanding and accomidating of us. I do wonder though what a normal birth is like. I have always been interested in midwiffery, but felt like it was a realm I had to be innitiated into by givimg birth myself. Now i still feel like it is out of my reach, how could I help another woman give birth when I never have myself? Oh well, maby if I can VBAC someday, I will have an even greater understanding.
 
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