I've been looking into and seriously considering homeschooling for our 10 month old son, but Dh is resistant. The more I read about it, the more I lean toward hs. However, Dh thinks hs kids are "weird" and "sheltered" though he's never really met any. Our new neighbors girls are homeschooled, and very well-adjusted, yet Dh seems to ignore that. I've told him that if he wants to discuss then he needs to do some research on hs first, but he isn't interested. I don't really know how to convince him of the benefits when he won't read anything I give him. Any ideas? His "argument" right now is that the public schools here are good, and they are, but that isn't my issue. I feel like *I* should be teaching my son and letting him learn at his own pace.
Unsupportive Dh?
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I have found the drip, drip, drip, of years of homeschool-positive talk from me has made a huge difference to dh this year. We decided to take ds out of a nice-sounding but not very nice-in-actual-fact kindergarten class. Keeping ds home was not the only solution to our problem, but it is one solution, and dh was happy to accept it, even though other people rave about the local ps as the end all and be all of educational wonder.
Was having someone he looked up to say what a great idea it was. Seriously, that's about all it took. That was when our dd was about 4. I had been suggesting it for a couple years, little comments here and there. He wasn't *against* it, he just wasn't for it, kwim?
But we were at his parents 50th anniversary, and I mentioned to one of his older brothers that I was interested in. He gushed about me doing it. How well it was for the child, on and on. It really boosted my decision. And when I informed dh, he was much more open to it.
Your baby is so little, you still have lots of time. Just make sure you already include "homeschool" activities in your everyday life. Because, really, you are already your childs first teacher. Your baby is learning everyday at home. Get in touch with a hs group, maybe set up a couple play dates with a hs family with older kids. Go to a hs meeting. Don't overwhelm your dh, just little things here and there.
Good luck!
But we were at his parents 50th anniversary, and I mentioned to one of his older brothers that I was interested in. He gushed about me doing it. How well it was for the child, on and on. It really boosted my decision. And when I informed dh, he was much more open to it.
Your baby is so little, you still have lots of time. Just make sure you already include "homeschool" activities in your everyday life. Because, really, you are already your childs first teacher. Your baby is learning everyday at home. Get in touch with a hs group, maybe set up a couple play dates with a hs family with older kids. Go to a hs meeting. Don't overwhelm your dh, just little things here and there.
Good luck!
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What I've found helps some men is them SEEING the results! My dh wasn't too convinced about HS'ing for a while. But after he's seen our dd read, do math, and the KONOS stuff we do..I've heard him bragging to people about what dd can do. LOL He told someone, "When I was in 1st grade I was learning ______, not about Russia!"
I agree a lot with Ali..don't overwhelm him. Do your research and get to know some more HS families. Then slowly work towards HS'ing and let him see the results.
I agree a lot with Ali..don't overwhelm him. Do your research and get to know some more HS families. Then slowly work towards HS'ing and let him see the results.
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I would kinda let it drop. Especially since your child is so young now. Then slowely start leaving things around that maybe he would pick up and read (I left books in the bathroom,lol) I was lucky though as my DH actually was secretly wanting me to choose this too. Good luck! Remember to not push though all at once because just like kids sometimes DH can push hard right back JUST for the sake of winning....
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Well, what do you do when Dh refuses to research homeschooling, doesn't know anyone personally that homeschools (or doesn't like/respect the hs'ers that he does know), and doesn't believe that I am capable of teaching our children? (ok, dh sounds like a jerk now but he really isn't!
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There are several problems that we have to overcome here:
1) DH is French. Homeschooling is really not common in France.
2) His father is a retired school teacher. DH grew up in a small town, had his father as a teacher for at least one year, his parents knew all of the teachers, and even though Dh didn't particularly like school - and from what I gather was somewhat of a mischiefmaker/ class clown - he had an ok time as a student.
3) We are currently living in Germany, where homeschooling is illegal. There are no homeschooling families around here. Children generally start kindergarten by age 3 and must start school by the end of their 6th year. DS just turned 5 and we will probably be here three more years. Dh thinks ds should start school next year. (although he doesn't really want him to go to a German school).
4) Dh thinks that I will not be able to handle staying home and "teaching" 3 children (ds is 5, dd is 3 and #3 is due in a couple of weeks) - as I often get stressed and depressed. (WHich has more to do with DH working really long hours, and with living in a country where I barely speak the language and not knowing many parents who share my parenting philosophies, than with being with the kids all day)
So. I keep telling Dh that I do not want to send the kids to school, that I am "qualified" to be responsible for their education, I try to explain all the positive aspects of HS but he doesn't want to listen.
The thing is - he knows how DS learns - or doesn't learn. When DS wants to learn something he does. If we try to push him into something he is not ready for or interested in he shuts us out, refuses to try, sulks or cries. He hates to be wrong but more importantly, he hates to be told that he is wrong (not that we flat out say "you're wrong" ! But often, if we try to correct him or show him another way to do something - look out!) So, imagine this kid in a normal school setting, being forced to do what all the other kids are doing, being corrected all the time...
Not to mention the fact that we are pretty unorganized, not good at forced schedules, going to bed early and having to get up early - and I know that if the kids were to go to school the responsibility of getting them up and dressed and fed and to and from school would basically fall on me. DS went to kindergarten for a month and mornings were hell! I'd much rather spend our time in a more productive manner like reading or playing games or going to the zoo or the museum or hey, sleeping!.
Well, I don't know if anyone can really help with this. I figure I've got another year to work on DH.
There are several problems that we have to overcome here:
1) DH is French. Homeschooling is really not common in France.
2) His father is a retired school teacher. DH grew up in a small town, had his father as a teacher for at least one year, his parents knew all of the teachers, and even though Dh didn't particularly like school - and from what I gather was somewhat of a mischiefmaker/ class clown - he had an ok time as a student.
3) We are currently living in Germany, where homeschooling is illegal. There are no homeschooling families around here. Children generally start kindergarten by age 3 and must start school by the end of their 6th year. DS just turned 5 and we will probably be here three more years. Dh thinks ds should start school next year. (although he doesn't really want him to go to a German school).
4) Dh thinks that I will not be able to handle staying home and "teaching" 3 children (ds is 5, dd is 3 and #3 is due in a couple of weeks) - as I often get stressed and depressed. (WHich has more to do with DH working really long hours, and with living in a country where I barely speak the language and not knowing many parents who share my parenting philosophies, than with being with the kids all day)
So. I keep telling Dh that I do not want to send the kids to school, that I am "qualified" to be responsible for their education, I try to explain all the positive aspects of HS but he doesn't want to listen.
The thing is - he knows how DS learns - or doesn't learn. When DS wants to learn something he does. If we try to push him into something he is not ready for or interested in he shuts us out, refuses to try, sulks or cries. He hates to be wrong but more importantly, he hates to be told that he is wrong (not that we flat out say "you're wrong" ! But often, if we try to correct him or show him another way to do something - look out!) So, imagine this kid in a normal school setting, being forced to do what all the other kids are doing, being corrected all the time...
Not to mention the fact that we are pretty unorganized, not good at forced schedules, going to bed early and having to get up early - and I know that if the kids were to go to school the responsibility of getting them up and dressed and fed and to and from school would basically fall on me. DS went to kindergarten for a month and mornings were hell! I'd much rather spend our time in a more productive manner like reading or playing games or going to the zoo or the museum or hey, sleeping!.
Well, I don't know if anyone can really help with this. I figure I've got another year to work on DH.
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I took dh to a local homeschool group picnic and he got to see all the normal people and kids there and I know that made an impression. The people were nice and social and the kids well behaved and it was not a religious group.
He's still on the fence about it, but is probably going to go with it if I do (my dd will be kindergarten age next fall)
He's still on the fence about it, but is probably going to go with it if I do (my dd will be kindergarten age next fall)
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