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Discussion Starter #1
I always expected that I would do CLW, but when my son was about 2 1/2 and I was pregnant with #2, I started to hate nursing. It didn't really hurt or involve any physical challenges that I was aware of, but just felt inexplicably almost unbearable. We were already down to nursing only at bedtime, so I finally decided to go ahead and wean, particularly so it could be done several months before the baby was born.<br><br>
Well, now she is two months old, and nursing her is going well. I was somewhat afraid that I would hate nursing her, too, but I don't. The problem is, we never really got into a good new bedtime routine with DS. The weaning process ended up being shorter than was probably ideal, and was also happening during a very busy, stressful time in our lives, so we kind of let it slide. Since we've never done CIO, the only ways he will go to sleep are riding in a car (which he often resists at night, because he doesn't want to sleep, I think), or watching videos, which sometimes goes on for hours.<br><br>
I don't really mind the videos in theory, but it's kind of sad watching him lying there in a stupor every night when I wish he would go to sleep reading books with us, snuggling, etc. (we still cosleep, and he likes to be read to, I think it's just hard for him to get to the point of going to sleep. We used to just read a few books and then he would be happy to lie down and nurse). Anyway, today the idea of trying unweaning occurred to me. He's almost three, but still asks occasionally, and it's been about six months.<br><br>
I'm a little worried, though, because there are a few worst (or worstish, I guess) case scenarios that come to mind: I still hate nursing him but feel I have to do it anyway for a couple of years, I still hate nursing and have to rewean soon, nursing goes ok but now we have to nurse at night and <i>still</i> end up watching hours of videos because we're out of the nursing to sleep routine... I guess I'm really tempted to try it, but I'd like any opinions or suggestions about how to do this as smoothly as possible. I guess I'm particularly curious about whether others have gone through this type of very visceral aversion to nursing older kids and whether it ever passed or not.<br><br>
Thanks!
 

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Do you still feel a real aversion to the idea of nursing a him at this age, or older ? If you imagine yourself doing it, how do you feel about it ? If it really feels negative, I don't think that feeling would go away...if that's the case, it would probably be better to look for another solution to help him get to sleep, instead of putting yourself in a situation in which you either feel obligated to keep doing something you really don't want to, or for him to have to adjust to weaning all over again.
 

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You're not crazy. I unweaned my 3.5 yr old twice.<br>
But... In the situation you described, I'd try lots of other sleep strategies before unweaning in the hopes it will work like magic and help him go to sleep. Reading your words, it doesn't seem, to me, like it'll be any better for you. And honestly could open up a whole host of other issues.<br><br>
My first born was (is) sleep-challenged. I'd be happy to help you brainstorm some other strategies. Also, have you read Elisabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Preschoolers?
 

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Laundrycrisis, thinking about it isn't unpleasant. That's why I'm considering it, but I have no idea if I'd feel differently in real life.<br><br>
SallyN, sure, I'd appreciate any suggestions. No, I haven't read that book, and maybe should, though I don't know when I'll be able to get a hold of it. Things we have tried, with little noticeable effect: a routine involving a bath, tiring him out during the day...
 

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I'm technically at the end of my morning computer time, so what follows is a brainstorm dump. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
we've done the tv to sleep thing. it's more successful if we're watching one of our shows as opposed to one of her shows. (something that won't give her nightmares or anything violent or inappropriate)<br><br>
try earlier bedtime? if we miss her sleep window, it takes her a much longer time to settle (happens to me to actually)<br><br>
change up the nap time? maybe earlier (if possible) so there's a longer window b/w waking from nap and bedtime?<br><br>
provide a sippy cup of water for him to have in bed?<br><br>
it can take up to two weeks for a new routine to work, so consistency is key.<br><br>
here's our current routine with the 3.5 yr old:<br>
dinner<br>
immediately after dinner is bath (though sometimes that gets her riled up... DH's fault)<br>
brush teeth, hair, potty<br>
pjs<br>
read two books<br>
snuggle for two songs (we use Raffi's "Quiet Time" cd)<br>
then DH or I will "keep her company" in her room (but not laying with her) until she falls asleep.<br><br>
finding her sleep window was key. for example, last night everything was out of whack because she took a nap. so instead of falling asleep at 7:30, she was still awake (despite honestly trying) at 9:30pm.
 
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