[L.J.]

Well, my ex has totally disgusted me again.

On the phone tonight, he tells me that he won't take our youngest (because of the eczema) tomorrow unless his face is completely clear. I said there was a little bit of redness. He said, "then I'll only take the oldest." I flat out said no to that. The last time we did that our youngest cried the entire day for his brother & his dad. It was so unfair & cruel. So his final comment was for me to keep the kids until I hear from his lawyer.

I can't believe this man. He admitted to me that it has more to do with "us" than the kids. He's mad right now because I won't do what he wants me to do, so he's decided to "teach me a lesson" and that's why he won't take our youngest. Nice guy, huh? So much for looking out for his kids best interests!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!! !!!!

 

[mocha09]

I cannot believe he is still perpetuating that eczema thing......

Is it written into your agreement that he must take both kids and cannot refuse one or the other? I can't believe he is so okay with using his kids as a weapon like this....

On the bright side, you don't have to miss your boys this weekend.

I'm sorry he's being such a @&#!.

 

[PumpkinSeeds]

I don't know your story, but I do have a ds with eczema.

It breaks my heart to know that your ds is being treated that way for something which he has no control over. Sad.

 

[Holland73]

Oh LJ, that is horrific...what is wrong with this man?!?!?

Your poor youngest son...how old is he? Does he understand what is going on?

 

[wemoon]

Here is a big huge AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH for you. What a freakin dink.

 

[L.J.]

Thanks guys.
This morning is tough.
The kids have been asking if they are going to dad's. They want to know why they're not going. They spent most of the day yesterday making things for him for Father's Day to give him today and they've been asking about how they will get their things to dad.
He just doesn't get it!
We'll see what happens when the kids phone & ask to come.
~ L.J.

 

[cottonwood]

Ah, he's going to have his lawyer contact you, eh? If he wants to play that game, I'd be documenting *everything* and start talking about suing for full custody and different visiting arrangements. What a jerk.

 

[Sacred Feather]

I am SO sorry your ex is being such a jerk. I also have a son with eczema and I cannot fathom why anyone would use that as an excuse.

:

He's in SERIOUS need of parenting classes if he honestly thinks that using the kids againts you is going to accomplish anything but turning them against HIM. Talk to your children (if they are over the age of 5) and explain to them that this is NOT the way grown ups are supposed to act.

When my first ex decided to play this game, I told my son that he was acting like a bully and was just trying to hurt me by being mean to him. That made him so mad that he called his father and said "if you're going to act like a bully and hurt my mom you are gonna have to find a different way. I don't want to see you again!!" It took my ex about 5 minutes to call his lawyer and the lawyer called me to talk to my son. When he told him what his father was doing, the lawyer got mad, called HIM and quit!!

 

[Soul-O]

Oh dear.... you are such a wonderful mama with fantastic little boys. They really do deserve better from their dad, as we all know. My heart aches for all of you. I can't believe a father would decline visitation to "teach you a lesson" - what a waste of space he is! Does he actually think his lawyer is going to do anything in this case when he is clearly in the wrong?

You are so much better off without that jerk - keep your chin up and keep doing what you are doing.

Enjoy this time with your boys.

 

[PikkuMyy]

My heart also aches for you, and especially your sons.

I'm sorry, I know you must have had something going originally with your stbx but what gives with that crazy man?!?!?! Eczema???

Help!

 

[L.J.]

So, the kids called & their dad came to pick them up.

Then he gets them belted in the car, closes the door & tells me I am to pick up the youngest at 1:00 because he has to go somewhere & he will not take him out with eczema on his face?!?!?!? He then wanted me to come back and get our oldest at 5. I refused....so he threatened to not be around so I wouldn't be able to get either one and he said he didn't care if he got in trouble about it or not. In the end, we agreed that I would pick both kids up at 2:30.

I don't know what makes me more sick. The fact that he uses the kids to "teach me a lesson" or the fact that he was so embarassed of his son that he refused to take him out because of a medical condition.

And to be honest ladies, his skin has been really bad at times in the past, but yesterday, he had a little redness about the size of a half dollar on his cheek, which, is nothing! Any kid could have a red cheek for any reason!

He refuses to meet in a public place, so I took a witness with me to his house to get the kids to make sure I got both of them and to make sure nothing else happened. I then asked, in front of the person, if he would like to explain why I was picking them up 2.5 hours early to which he played dumb, said, "I don't know" and said he refused to say anything about our "private conversations" in front of someone else.

WHATEVER!

Another call to the lawyer's office tomorrow.

 

[the sunshine]

You kick butt. he's an ass.

Good for you for bringing someone with you!! We need that "fist pumping in the air" smiley.

 

[laralou]

Can you start recording all your conversations with him either on the phone or in person? I'd do that and even tell him that you are recording him.

He sounds like a crappy human being.

 

[L.J.]

I've actually told him I won't have anymore conversations with him that are not witnessed or recorded. I've suggested we communicate by email only.

 

[Quirky]

Oh my heavens, what an ass. Does he have any idea the emotional scarring he could inflict on your son? Way worse than eczema.

I am so sorry, mama. You have acted so honorably toward him and he continues to be the world's biggest jerk.

I hope he is reincarnated as the cockroach he is.

 

[wemoon]

Another huge AAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH for you. Land sakes alive, what the hell is wrong with him.

 

[SingleDad]

Your post reminded me of a coworker I once had that had a daughter who was a burn victim. She never even thought twice about taking her out in public, or cared what anyone said. She was proud that was her daughter, and there were no "if's" or "but's" to it. Your ex sounds like such an ass, I think he's doing this more to torture you than your child, but using your baby as a pawn is unforgivable. I say if he wants to take you to court LET HIM, believe me, he'll be sorry he did. I'd tell him that the next time you talk too. When he says he'll take you to court, get all happy and excited and say "OKAY!!!! LET"S GO!!!".....he'll think twice before he threatens that again!!

Best of luck to you in this, and I'll pray for you to have strength, and for him to get eczema on his face!