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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi all,
I am venting and maybe requesting commiseration, sympathy, advice, what have you. DD is nine months old and for about two-three months but worse lately, she's been waking up after 30 minutes after falling asleep.

We co-sleep and I usually nurse her to sleep in our bed. Unless I am next to her, she won't continue to sleep more than 30 minutes before she wakes up and needs to be nursed back to sleep. It's difficult enough to get out of bed after she falls asleep without waking her back up and starting the whole process again for her to fall asleep again. The process takes 20-60 minutes sometimes. She just won't relax enough to fall asleep.

Night time is esp difficult. The past few nights she's waking up every hour crying. She still has no teeth and her gums aren't swollen but I'm guessing we're coming up on crawling or teething or both.

Regardless, she can't self-soothe or sleep on her own for more than 30 minutes...occasionally we're lucky and we get 60-90 minutes.

I'm beyond frustrated!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by danna View Post
Hi all,
I am venting and maybe requesting commiseration, sympathy, advice, what have you. DD is nine months old and for about two-three months but worse lately, she's been waking up after 30 minutes after falling asleep.

We co-sleep and I usually nurse her to sleep in our bed. Unless I am next to her, she won't continue to sleep more than 30 minutes before she wakes up and needs to be nursed back to sleep. It's difficult enough to get out of bed after she falls asleep without waking her back up and starting the whole process again for her to fall asleep again. The process takes 20-60 minutes sometimes. She just won't relax enough to fall asleep.

Night time is esp difficult. The past few nights she's waking up every hour crying. She still has no teeth and her gums aren't swollen but I'm guessing we're coming up on crawling or teething or both.

Regardless, she can't self-soothe or sleep on her own for more than 30 minutes...occasionally we're lucky and we get 60-90 minutes.

I'm beyond frustrated!
Right there with you sister and it SUCKS!
I'm sorry that I don't have any advice. I'd love some too!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Ha! I just read your post and was nodding the whole time. It's 1:30 p.m here and my baby has still not napped. I've tried for two hours to get her to nap, even putting her to bed with me before she got overly tired. No dice. She's playing in her crib right now for the time being so I could eat lunch!
 

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I could have written that!

Things seem to have gotten somewhat better in the past week, after several months of tough sleep times. She actually sleeps for several hours without waking, if she is in the bed next to me. I am encouraged that it may have been just a stage she was working through.

I still can't get her to sleep for more than 30 minutes if I'm out of the room, though, and she won't nap alone, at all.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
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Originally Posted by alegna View Post
That sounds rough. I would investigate food sensitivities.

good luck!

-Angela
She is exclusively breastfed and I've been off of dairy since she was a few weeks old. I recently gave up soy too when my LC recommended she might be reacting to it.

I'll tell you, at this point I'm wondering if it's unusual, common, my fault, her temperament, her unwillingness to succumb to a routine, my taking the path of least resistance, the position of the planets in our solar system, etc., that's the source of such little sleep.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by danna View Post
She is exclusively breastfed and I've been off of dairy since she was a few weeks old. I recently gave up soy too when my LC recommended she might be reacting to it.

I'll tell you, at this point I'm wondering if it's unusual, common, my fault, her temperament, her unwillingness to succumb to a routine, my taking the path of least resistance, the position of the planets in our solar system, etc., that's the source of such little sleep.

I have several friends that are in the same boat. I am starting to think that it is more common than people want to let on!
 

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Originally Posted by Evansmama View Post
I have several friends that are in the same boat. I am starting to think that it is more common than people want to let on!
I've never understood why your child sleeping through the night is like a badge of good parenting. Geez, why lie about how well your child sleeps?!?!

We've been there. It peaked at 12 months and then started to get better.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by danna View Post
She is exclusively breastfed and I've been off of dairy since she was a few weeks old. I recently gave up soy too when my LC recommended she might be reacting to it.

I'll tell you, at this point I'm wondering if it's unusual, common, my fault, her temperament, her unwillingness to succumb to a routine, my taking the path of least resistance, the position of the planets in our solar system, etc., that's the source of such little sleep.
I hate to suggest it but would you consider an elimination diet? I've heard several moms of kids with food intolerances that had sleep problems like this.

Good luck! I hope you get some well deserved sleep soon!

-Angela
 

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DD was like that too. Every.30.minutes.on.the.minute. Until she was about 18 months old. Nothing, NOTHING I did helped. Elimination diet, more solids, less solids, no solids, routine, no routine, white noise, total darkness, lots of activity, not so much activity, music, sling, driving, everything short of CIO. It was just her. I worried and worried and stressed about it. One day, she just slept better. I don't know what happened. She didn't sleep more than a couple hours until she was over 2 years old. I tell you this not to freak you out and make you crazy, but to save you the frustration of wondering if you are doing something wrong, the planets aren't aligned,
ect. It's just the way it is for some kids. At about a year I just stopped stressing about it. I just had to MAKE myself not care. Oh, it's still frustrating at times, but I just focus more on accepting that THIS IS REALITY. I'm not willing to change it enough to let her cry, and even then, I dont think it would work. When I let it go, I found it much easier to deal. I used that time lying in bed to relax, catch up on sleep, or read a book with a book light. Once she is asleep, I can turn the tv on, or dh and I can have pillow talk in bed and she stays asleep. Now that I am pregnant, I'm thankful for the fact that I *have* to stay in bed, it forces me to stop cleaning or doing chores and give my body the rest it needs. Hang in there mama, this too shall pass...or at least get better in time! HTH.
 

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Right there with you, momma.

Same age, same issue. I have tried everything I can think of, but for us pushing her bed time back a little and a very consistent routine has helped get her to sleep, but NOTHING has improved her ability to stay asleep.

I think some people are just hardwired in a way that makes relaxing and shutting down really difficult.

Hang in there.

(If it makes you feel better last night dd was up saying "hi" over and over again at various intervals. She finally got up at 4 and was totally done sleeping)
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by danna View Post
Hi all,
I am venting and maybe requesting commiseration, sympathy, advice, what have you. DD is nine months old and for about two-three months but worse lately, she's been waking up after 30 minutes after falling asleep.

We co-sleep and I usually nurse her to sleep in our bed. Unless I am next to her, she won't continue to sleep more than 30 minutes before she wakes up and needs to be nursed back to sleep. It's difficult enough to get out of bed after she falls asleep without waking her back up and starting the whole process again for her to fall asleep again. The process takes 20-60 minutes sometimes. She just won't relax enough to fall asleep.

Night time is esp difficult. The past few nights she's waking up every hour crying. She still has no teeth and her gums aren't swollen but I'm guessing we're coming up on crawling or teething or both.

Regardless, she can't self-soothe or sleep on her own for more than 30 minutes...occasionally we're lucky and we get 60-90 minutes.

I'm beyond frustrated!

I have been there mama, it's so hard I know. Is she your only child? My first child was like that and I figured out that he could take his nap on my lap in the living room and I could surf the net and nurse him all afternoon. These were true marathon nursing sessions for 3-4 hours at a time. I'd gather my phone, snack and water and settle in for the long haul. In the evening we'd do the same thing and when I was ready for bed I'd stand up with him still in my arms, still nursing and take him to bed with me. I was lucky in that he was my only child and I didn't have to worry about anyone else during those first 14 months that we did this for all sleep, day and night. I did so much nursing back then that it was seriously like nursing triplets. I was nervous when I got pg with #2 since I was unsure how all that nursing would be possible with ds1 jumping around all day.
 

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My ds (3) did this for quite some time, I can't remember how it started, or how it ended, it is all a blur, more like a nightmare! I was soooo tired. They get through it and so do we with the addition of some grey hair and a few new wrinkles.

But now my dd (5 mo) is trying the same moves! This time I was/am determined not to let it happen. But it is very hard...it requires me to comfort her in other ways...a lot more difficult at 2, 3, and 4 am! I know when she is having a growth spurt (2 to date!) and will feed her more often then but other times I rock her, use the bounce ball, or give her to dh ( I think it pisses her off more when she can smell me)

Getting nursed to sleep would be ideal, who wouldn't want that! But I need a little bit of sleep too! I by no means make her sleep through the night with out a bite, but instead of feeding her every hour, I feed her one hour, comfort her the next. This has helped and she is now sleeping 3 hour chunks!!! Yeah!! I have been feeding her every 3 hours but will try again to eliminate a feeding. Its difficult at the moment but in the long run it helps, at least for us!

Good luck!!
 

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Originally Posted by DiMi mama View Post
But it is very hard...it requires me to comfort her in other ways...a lot more difficult at 2, 3, and 4 am! I know when she is having a growth spurt (2 to date!) and will feed her more often then but other times I rock her, use the bounce ball, or give her to dh ( I think it pisses her off more when she can smell me)

I feed her one hour, comfort her the next.
I tried this route too, but the only way for me to do it is to have dh take her every other hour or half hour and he just gets too tired/frustrated with that.

I think he needs less sleep than I do but he does a lot worse off of broken sleep than me.

Any suggestions for me in comforting dd at night besides marathon nursing sessions? My back/neck are all out of whack and then I've got to put in my 8 at work the next day.
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
I guess it's nice to know I'm not alone. And yes, she is our only child and I'm thinking she might stay that way. I couldn't imagine how hard it would be to juggle two children with sleep issues!
 

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Oh, I'm so sorry. It's really, really hard. I empathize completely. I have a four year old who was a terrible sleeper. Not sure if it was the teething or the temperament or both but she woke up every half hour like that too. Sleep did not improve for us until she was just over two. We also tried absolutely everything (elimination diets, homeopathy, cranio sacral, etc.), and nothing worked. Not to say you shouldn't try things, because maybe you will hit on the thing that works. But honestly I think it's a temperament thing, an extreme sensitivity to sensations (like teething/developmental leaps) that other babes take more in stride. I really understand how awful it is. We are still shaking in our booties about the thought of having another baby and going through that again. She may remain an only child! I do remember that those really atrocious nights of mega frequent wakings would come and go, so hopefully you will have some breaks and times when it's not so hard. And it will get better eventually, it will. Hang in there!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by nylecoj View Post
I tried this route too, but the only way for me to do it is to have dh take her every other hour or half hour and he just gets too tired/frustrated with that.

I think he needs less sleep than I do but he does a lot worse off of broken sleep than me.

Any suggestions for me in comforting dd at night besides marathon nursing sessions? My back/neck are all out of whack and then I've got to put in my 8 at work the next day.
If I had to work, I wouldn't try anything new until the weekend. All you have to do is break the cycle, so that they don't get in the habit of eating every 30 min or every hour. I comfort my dd (5mo) by rubbing her belly, shushing softly, I shake the co-sleeper softly if she continues, when that doesn't work I pull myself out of bed and bounce on the birthing ball with her until she is asleep, (at times up to 30 or 45 min!) If she continues to howl particularly loud, I give in and nurse but only after I have seriously tried to comfort her. Some kids are more persistant like my ds(3) I don't think this tactic would have worked with him . So it depends on the persistance of your little one.

And definitely learn to side nurse, that is side lying, you only have to roll them up close to you and latch them on. I have heard of moms being able to sleep right through nursing sessions!
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by DiMi mama View Post
If I had to work, I wouldn't try anything new until the weekend. All you have to do is break the cycle, so that they don't get in the habit of eating every 30 min or every hour. I comfort my dd (5mo) by rubbing her belly, shushing softly, I shake the co-sleeper softly if she continues, when that doesn't work I pull myself out of bed and bounce on the birthing ball with her until she is asleep, (at times up to 30 or 45 min!) If she continues to howl particularly loud, I give in and nurse but only after I have seriously tried to comfort her. Some kids are more persistant like my ds(3) I don't think this tactic would have worked with him . So it depends on the persistance of your little one.

And definitely learn to side nurse, that is side lying, you only have to roll them up close to you and latch them on. I have heard of moms being able to sleep right through nursing sessions!
Thanks for the tip. I'll definitely try this on a weekend and see if it works.

And we do side nurse, but I dunno, I wake up feeling all funkified the next day. I do sleep a lot more than I would sitting up, but my lower back still feels wonky unless I use 18 pillows.
 

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Can't add much else but to say hang in there.

Perhaps your little one is about to cut some teeth and then hopefully she'll be a much happier camper and able to soothe herself back to sleep. My DS didn't get teeth until 11 months old but I swear he was teething for 6+ months. Perhaps the rough teething = his poor sleep. I guess I never thought about this, but he did start sleeping A LOT better just after his first birthday (he cut 5 new teeth in that 11th month).

My DD also wakes up after 30 minutes of sleep. Usually, I can soothe her back to sleep by giving her the binkie and gently patting her bottom. Sometimes she's up and not going back down though.

Good luck. I hope your back starts to feel better soon. Co-sleeping has done a number on my back and I'm actually sort of looking forward to getting DD out of our bed so I can rest comfortably and stop aching so much.
 
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