[NordicMamma]

I post on a mainstream (American) pg website, and sometimes I really wonder why I bother. So much of it has my blood boiling and my toes curling.

Aside from the fact that 99% are having a hospital birth (the only 2 homebirths recently have been Europeans - one in Holland, and one who plans to give birth in Britain), and 95% are DEFINITELY getting an epidural, no matter what, the vast majority of them want to be induced before their due date!

I don't understand it. Sure, I understand being impatient, but unless there is a good medical reason why the baby is better out than in, why would you WANT a preemie? Or even one born at 37 weeks? Yes, it is considered 'full-term', but that can still be too early for some babies. My sister was born at 37 weeks, and her lungs were not quite up for the job, even at that age. She spent a week in the NICU.

And then there are those who say 'My doctor wants to induce if I go 2 days past my due date.' Do they really not understand the concept that 40 weeks is an AVERAGE?!

Arggghhhh. I am tearing my hair out sometimes!

 

[kama'aina mama]

Actually average is closer to 41 weeks. I don't get it either. I can't imagine being induced without serious medical cause. And by serious medical cause I mean something heavy enough that we would be passing induction and not collecting $200 and going straight to crash section.

 

[onlyboys]

Not to mention the fact that induction is so much harder on your body than spontaneous labor! But, I guess if you get an epidural you don't necessarily feel it...

 

[MilkOnDemand]

Generally, I think a lot of women are so used to everything being scheduled and done at a specific time that they just want birth to be that way too - nevermind that it is downright ludicrous to assume that birth can be scheduled unless you are having a section.

I don't even post on any other sites anymore because they make me so angry. See, I am fairly certain I'll need a c-section unless baby turns soon (and yes I'm working hard on that with no luck), however, I won't plan it. Unless we have some sort of distress, I'll go into labor naturally and if I show up at the hospital with a breech lie, then they can proceed (no hospital here will deliver a breech anymore), but I surely won't schedule one for a big baby or convience.

 

[bri276]

they're not educated on the subject and they trust their doctors far too much, plus they see so many friends/family members do the same thing with great results- they don't care about doing it the natural way. at all.

 

[leosmama20]

Um, don't get me wrong, I agree with everyone, but I think a lot of it is that they are hugely preggo and miserable and just want to be done. So, when their doc slips the idea of inducing, they rationalize it as being for the best.

Can I just admit, I swore I would never do another induction or epidural and here I am, almost 36 weeks, sick as a dog again, and wishing it to be done with. NOT that I will be getting an induction from my mw, but still. A tiny part of me at this point wishes I had an OB who would induce cause I am about to lose it mentally being so sick physically. UGH. And, my first baby was big, and was VERY difficult for ME to deliver and I had a lot of really horrid tearing. I wish I could be on board with my "body won't make a baby bigger than I can deliver" and don't get me wrong, generally speaking I am, but my body is basically a big fat failure when it comes to pregnancy.... ugg. Okay, ignore my little whatever.

 

[soccerchic21]

Quote:

Originally Posted by leosmama20 Um, don't get me wrong, I agree with everyone, but I think a lot of it is that they are hugely preggo and miserable and just want to be done. So, when their doc slips the idea of inducing, they rationalize it as being for the best.

That is probably true. When I first saw the title of this thread I was ready to come in and try to talk you out of inducing.

I was induced at 41 weeks with my first...not because anything was wrong just because I was "late" looking back I wish I would have been more informed and more patient. I was dialated to about 2 and had lost my plug so I was probably going to go by myself any day. I wish more women would just read up on induction before they get one.

 

[nonconformnmom]

I, too, feel very annoyed and surprised at the number of women who get induced simply for being at, near, or a day or two past their "due dates". All of my babies were late: the first one 5 days past, the second 12 days, and the third 11 days. Was I miserable and anxious for it to be over? Of course! Did my OBs and midwives seduce me with talk of inductions? They certainly tried.

What really got me is so many people would say to me, "You were due a while ago, right? When are they going to induce you?" When are THEY going to induce me?!! I would always reply, "THEY are not going to do anything to me unless I say they can!" Then I would go on to say that, while my doctors had offered to induce and in some cases even advised it, I felt it was important to let my baby come when she was ready and that I trusted my body to perform optimally.

This was particularly important since I planned natural, unmedicated births and inductions would start the process off on the wrong foot from the get go.

 

[philomom]

Yep. This happened to a family member of mine. Induced almost three weeks early for a "lame" reason. I look at her birth pics with the tubes and wires and just have to go off quietly by myself. No sense in making her feel like do-do, but golly, it would not have happened to me.

This same person is preggies again and the only thing I have said to her was " It's so much easier on you when you go into labor on your own."

 

[jeanieloz]

Quote:

Originally Posted by leosmama20 I wish I could be on board with my "body won't make a baby bigger than I can deliver" and don't get me wrong, generally speaking I am, but my body is basically a big fat failure when it comes to pregnancy.

Ok I can totally relate, in some way an induction would be nice, but I would only really concent if medical reasons. But really I would love to have this baby 2 weeks early, as it will probably be 8 pounds anyway. Carrying and birthing large babies is very hard on the body, my last two were over 10 pounds, Cameron was just 4 days late and was 10.1, but Liam was 10 days late, and 10.14. Seriously I wanted to just die, I was in so much pain, and greif, and just couldn't take not being able to really do anything, and know even if they came a little early they would still be large babies. I can understand being uncomfortable even carrying a smaller baby, but sometimes I want to slap a woman who complains about the end of her pregnancy and her baby was 6 pounds! I always felt like telling them, well try carrying and birthing your baby when it's 3 months old, and then you will know how I felt!
Donna

 

[onlyboys]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jeanieloz I can understand being uncomfortable even carrying a smaller baby, but sometimes I want to slap a woman who complains about the end of her pregnancy and her baby was 6 pounds! I always felt like telling them, well try carrying and birthing your baby when it's 3 months old, and then you will know how I felt! Donna

It really matters very little how big the baby is. Position of the baby has way more of an impact on how the mama feels. Ask a mama who has had sciatica how comfy she is carrying a 6lber. Pain in pregnancy sucks. Period.

I have to confess, my easiest baby to carry was my biggest, but I worked like the devil to keep him positioned properly.

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[IAmAMamaToLogan]

Quote:

Originally Posted by leosmama20 Um, don't get me wrong, I agree with everyone, but I think a lot of it is that they are hugely preggo and miserable and just want to be done. So, when their doc slips the idea of inducing, they rationalize it as being for the best.

It's pretty disturbing though that some (I've read this more times then you can imagine) Drs are talking induction at 20 weeks!!!

I guess I'm mostly bothered by women who 100% trust their doctors and then blame them when things go wrong. There is such a wealth of information out there, I just wish more women would research for themselves before trusting someone they see once or twice a month for 15 minutes at a time.

 

[shayinme]

Quote:

Originally Posted by leosmama20 Um, don't get me wrong, I agree with everyone, but I think a lot of it is that they are hugely preggo and miserable and just want to be done. So, when their doc slips the idea of inducing, they rationalize it as being for the best. .

Ditto. I think the fact that so many women just don't think about it is why they are so willing to get induced despite the potential issues. I won't lie there is a part of me that wouldn't complain if my babe decides to enter the world the first week of July (my 38th week) yet I would not induce to have it happen.

I think another problem is so much stock is put into the due date, I am at the point that I don't even tell people the actual due date, as our BFW intrsuctor said we have a window of time to give birth. I prefer that outlook better rather than focusing on specific dates.

Someone brought up the issue of doing their own research, there are truly people who feel that the doc knows best. An associate of mine is serving on a non-profit board with an AP mama and we had a interesting dialogue on how the AP mama is always trying to tell my very mainstream buddy to consider alternative therapies and my mainstream buddy thinks the AP mama is a quack. I actually even said there is a lot of good alternative therapies rather than using meds for whatever the problem was that mainstream Mama was having and I suggested to mainstream mama to do some research. She told me she is too busy to sit on a computer doing research/go to library and she completely trusts her docs.

What do you say to people like that? Of course this same woman thinks I am strange for using a MW and a birthing center- she has 2 small kids and I have a 13 yo so I had to remind her that I have given birth w/o drugs before. I say all this to say her line of thinking is so common.

I fully beleive we should trust our bodies, I knew before my Mom was diagnosed with lung cancer that she was sick despite the doc blowing smoke up our butts. I think my Mom knew too. I am not saying you can't trust a doctor but having recently dealt with illness & death recently, I have learned that we know our bodies better than a doc.

 

[dynamohumm6]

I'm nosing over from June 2005, but wanted to say that this is precisely why I had to leave a mainstream birth club board. Aside from the "breastfeeding is gross" and "co-sleeping is dangerous" threads that popped up every day, I just couldn't take it when women started talking about how happy they were that their dr's would induce them 2 or 3 weeks early so that they wouldn't miss a graduation/wedding/vacation that their due date might have interrupted. uke

 

[leosmama20]

Well, I guess "big" is relative. LOL After nearly 10 lbs, I would be beyond thrilled with an 8 lber, and I know that a lot of people think that 8 lbs is a "big" baby.

 

[shayinme]

I have been dying to know since when did 8 lbs become a large baby.

When I had my son 13 years ago, he was 8lbs 5oz and 22 inches and I was smallish at the time yet there was no talk of inducing or any of the other madness I read about at mainstream sites. I have seen similiar sized women say they could not vaginally deliver a baby similiar to my son, what gets me is when the doc is the one telling them that.

Its amazing and not in a good way.

 

[jeanieloz]

Quote:

Originally Posted by onlyboys It really matters very little how big the baby is. Position of the baby has way more of an impact on how the mama feels. Ask a mama who has had sciatica how comfy she is carrying a 6lber. Pain in pregnancy sucks.

They were both positioned correctly, and were for 4-5 weeks before birth, actually my first was not and I had complete back labor with him and it was the most painful labor and he was just under 8 pounds.
I just think that I and leosmama may have the same problem with our bodies. I am 5'6", and am very short waisted I only have 1 1/2 inches from the top of my hip to my bottom rib, those hip hugger pants actually go to my waist!
The labors weren't bad at all, and pushing I had no problem, but carrying I do, and I've suffered from sciatica for a long time, even when not pregnant.

I realize pain is pain, whether pregnant or not, and some pregnant women suffer more than others, regardless of the size of their baby.
Donna

 

[BinahYeteirah]

Quote:

Originally Posted by IAmAMamaToLogan It's pretty disturbing though that some (I've read this more times then you can imagine) Drs are talking induction at 20 weeks!!!

Seriously? Where did you hear this?

 

[bri276]

I think she meant discussing the possibility of scheduling an induction at the end of pregnancy when the woman is 20 wks, not actually delivering the baby at 20 weeks, because that would only happen in rare cases (preeclampsia, PROM with infection, etc)

 

[BinahYeteirah]

Oh, duh!

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