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Is anyone else having trouble with the emotional side of weight gain? Logically I know I need to gain weight and most of it is not fat. Emotionally though I feel like this fat, gross blob. Last pregnancy it took me 13 months to get back to normal and I'm dreading that happening again this time. My eating is ok, but I can take it to extremes with the exercise some weeks. Some weeks I'll go to the gym 5-6 times, even though my body is telling me I need a break. i just don't know how to make peace with my new body, especially since I've always had some a crappy body image.
 

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Yeah. I was 250 when I gave birth to dd2. I worked HARD and lost over 80 pounds. Now 1 baby and 3 pregnancies later I'm almost that heavy again <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> It's hard not to get upset about it. But I know I did it before and I WILL do it again. I plan on renewing my gym membership when this baby is around 4 months old (that's when I started working out after dd2) and getting back in shape.<br><br>
I wouldn't feel so bad about it if I were eating healthier, but I still don't have much of an appetite for anything other than carbs and meats, blah.
 

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Fluffy or thin I think that the weight gain is hard because our hormones are making us eat more and hold on to reserve fat but we always have it in the back of our mind that we have to loose the weight eventually. I am not overweight and was on the thin side when I got pregnant, about 120 and I have gained 16lbs so far and I know I have struggled with getting used to the change in my body. It especially does not help when the RN at my last OB visit commented to me "WOW, you gained 5 lbs, I guess that is OK but you can't do that every appointment." I was just thinking how hard it has been to "accept" the weight gain and be comfortable in our bodies when we have to hear comments like this.<br>
Just remember we have to put our babies first and this time is only temporary and soon enough we will be able to get back our former figures if we choose.
 

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just wanted to post an encouraging/loving quote for you beautiful ladies...I can't directly relate, as I haven't gained any weight yet, but I get what you're feeling, as my shape has definitely shifted in a huge way <hugs><br><br>
"The beauty of my body is not measured by the size of the clothes it can fit into, but by the stories that it tells. I have a belly and hips that say, 'We grew a child in here,' and breasts that say, 'We nourished life.'" ~Sarah, from the book <span style="text-decoration:underline;">I Am Beautiful: A Celebration of Women in their Own Words</span><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/hug2.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Hug2">
 

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Yes, I can certainly understand your feelings.<br><br>
I've struggled with weight my entire life - I've been fat, and I've been super thin and eveywhere inbetween. I gained a TON of weight when pregnant with ds - I was HUGE. I had an a-hole of a husband, my Dad was near death for several months in the ICU and I stuffed my face for comfort. After I had ds, I didn't loose weight - I was miserable in my marriage and gained a few more pounds. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> I've never been so heavy or miserable in my entire life.<br><br>
I had gastric bypass and lost about 80 pounds to where I was very, very thin. I've balanced out over the years (had my gbs 7 years ago now) and I started this pregnancy a little heavier than I would like, but not overweight.<br><br>
I have been eating very well, and have not gained any weight yet. I admit that I have issues and fret over it though .. I'm just so scared of repeating what happened with ds. Although I think by 17 weeks with him, I was probably already up 15+ pounds, maybe more. Ugh.<br><br>
It's difficult. I just want to give my support. I'm just trying to eat healthy, whole food options, do yoga and have my goal be HEALTH not a number. Easier said than done, and I'm sure I'll worry more once I start to gain weight which should be any time now.
 

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i seem to be having a tougher time this time around because i started off 7lbs heavier than where i usually am. (see, even writing that makes me feel petty and silly) but it is difficult getting to know a whole new body shape that you're not used to, especially when extra fat is involved. i've gained 10 lbs so far which is so normal and right on track (at almost 20 weeks), but it is often hard to remember i'm pregnant and not just fat. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue"> it seems lately my butt is competing w/ my belly, but what'er ya gonna do, aside from eating right and stopping to take a moment to gain perspective every so often.<br><br>
logically and objectively, we all know our bodies are goddess-like, powerful temples that house these amazing miracles, but emotionally, i agree that it's tough sometimes.
 

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Yeah ... I lost 35lbs (below my pre-pregnancy weight) in the last 6 months before getting pregnant again. It has been a very hard shift to go from restricting calories to eating to support a pregnancy. So far I've gained 10 lbs but I've been mostly successful in sticking with lots of fruits, veggies, quality protein, and whole grains while avoiding sweets. It's really hard to see the numbers on the scale going up but I'm proud of eating well for my baby.<br><br>
Btw, uneven weight gain and weight gain spikes are pretty common in the second trimester from what I've heard. It's when our bodies are making a lot of changes like increasing blood volume and our babies are doing a lot of growing.
 

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Discussion Starter #8
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>lotusma</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15400132"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
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logically and objectively, we all know our bodies are goddess-like, powerful temples that house these amazing miracles, but emotionally, i agree that it's tough sometimes.</div>
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I am so glad someone knows exactly what I mean! I know my body is awesome and blah blah blah, but it's a different shape now,I was just starting to look like I wanted to, DD had weaned so I had my entire body back, my sex drive was finally starting to come back and *bam*. Now that's all gone and I'm struggling to be ok with it. I really need to start writing these awesome quotes that people have done and try to read them every day.
 

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I am also having a hard time with weight gain. Last time around I gained 65lbs and I don't want to repeat that as I still hadn't lost all my weight from pregnancy #1 when I got pregnant this time.<br><br>
So far I am 16 weeks and up about 5lbs, but I am having a harder time day by day making good food choices.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>hotharmony</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15400663"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I am having a harder time day by day making good food choices.</div>
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me too. must. buckle. down.<br><br>
fitday worked awesome for me just weeks ago.
 

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Yeah. I'm having a hard time with it.<br><br>
I started out about 38 lbs above my prepregnancy weight with DD this time around, with her I started at 200. We were giving it one more month of TTC and then I was going to rock the walking/workout stuff this summer. I'm still doing a little, but not trying to lose weight at this point. It's been hard since I'm finishing up my last semester of gradschool.<br><br>
I keep telling myself I'll be able to lose the weight. I lost 60 lbs 6 years ago with diet/exercise and I know I can do it again. I just haven't. God help me if I see 250lbs, I'm a little afraid I'll get there (I'm about 10 lbs away).
 

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I'm so glad you wrote this post. It's something I've been struggling with as well. It always seems right as I'm back at my pre and sometimes better than pregnancy weight I get pregnant again. This is something I'm definitely struggling with. So I make it a point to hit the gym on top of at least 3-5 days of yoga practice. I also am more focused on eating healthier. Thankfully I'm craving all the good stuff this time around - raw, fresh foods. But still, I get down on myself a lot and have to remind myself that I'm growing a human being and just to be gentle with myself.<br><br>
I totally feel you.
 

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Yeah, it's hard. Intellectually, I know that gaining during pregnancy is good, and that I didn't start out overweight enough that not gaining would be healthy. Emotionally, I'm happy for having lost 10lbs during the first trimester (though this was certainly not due to purposeful dieting!), and not really having gained anything since.
 

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Pregnancy weight gain is such a mind-trip. I have always worked hard to stay fit but when I got pregnant with DS I blew up, despite good eating and exercise habits. It didn't help that EVERYONE had something to say about my size. I remember sobbing on my way home from my 5 month appointment because I had gained 10 pounds that month and the midwife gave me a long lecture about it (I changed midwives after that). And of course almost all pregnancy guides (at least the mainstream ones) talk about how weight gain above the recommendation is the result of being a gluttonous pig.<br><br>
Here I am at 5 months now and looking at an almost 10 pound gain for the month. I was sick as a dog in the first trimester, barfing almost every day, and I still had a steady weight gain. I guess I need to accept that my body knows what it is doing. I gained 45 pound last time. I didn't want to do it again this time but it looks like it is going to be unavoidable.<br><br>
I am visiting my family this week and I am going to see my sister who I know will make cracks about my weight gain. Ugh.<br><br>
Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>lotusma</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/15400132"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;"><br>
logically and objectively, we all know our bodies are goddess-like, powerful temples that house these amazing miracles, but emotionally, i agree that it's tough sometimes.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/yeahthat.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="yeah that"><br><br>
I gained 50 pounds with dd3 and it didn't upset me, because I was eating very healthy and exercising 3-5 times a week, plus walking 5+ miles a week and doing yoga a few times a week. This time though I'm eating crappy and not exercising.<br><br>
And it's not sagging boobs or stretchmarks or any other indicator of pregnancy that bothers me, it's just being obese and knowing it's all because I'm not currently living a healthy lifestyle. I recognize a lot of the weight gain came from losing two babies back to back so I don't beat myself up about it, but I'm just in a funk and it's hard to get out of it.
 

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I've gained 25 pounds already and honestly I feel just awful about it. NONE of my clothes fit and although I'm much happier now that can feel the baby moving around my drastic weight gain makes me feel really unattractive. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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I found my size medium maternity clothes from my third pregnancy, that was a little depressing <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad">
 

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I am not too worried about my weight gain (today, at least). I think I'll have gained a total of 10 pounds at 20 weeks, which is fine. I have weeks where I gain a lot all at once and I start freaking out a little and then my weight gain slows down again and I calm down. I'm getting used to it.<br><br>
I think I'd be worried about it more but my doctor has been really great and hasn't been commenting on my weight gain at all, and I can't imagine her telling me that I've gained too much or too little or even telling me I have gained the right amount. She seems like she's not the type to say anything about weight gain unless I am gaining way over or under the recommended amount. I appreciate that so much, especially when I hear/read about others being lectured about their totally normal weight gain.<br><br>
I'm still not happy about having bigger boobs (I liked barely having boobs at all) and the fact that I will have some extra weight to lose later, but I'm not stressing out over it right now.
 

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A sign above the scale in the bathroom at my midwive's says<br><br>
"Think of the number as your IQ."<br><br>
I like that.<br><br>
eta: because if it is true. I am freaking off the charts.
 

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love the post above!! My IQ is rising daily! :) Weight gain sucks in pg because it's absolutely necessary but it hits all of us in the core of our self esteem. I know I've gained more with this one and will lose it at some point but it's still difficult. MW warned me that the OB might comment because he's a marathoner and thinks every woman should be a runner and not gain more than x amount. I love him dearly but I will have to punch him in the face if he gives me a hard time.
 
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