[JohnnysGirl]

...on a joint custody agreement. Even with 4 social workers and a translator there to help us mediate. 3 hours of him just taking the opportunity to badmouth me and talk about what a disaster/mess/incompetent woman I am. I took the high road, outclassed him by a mile.

But I walked away feeling so utterly alone out here in this country without anyone in my corner. Sigh.

 

[chaoticzenmom]

I'm sorry. Are you able to see your boys more often though? I hope he digs himself a grave.

 

[Ceinwen]

Did anything come out of today? I'm so proud of you for being the bigger person; that is absolutely excruciatingly difficult to do sometimes.

 

[pinetree]

Sometimes the only thing you can hold on to is that you're acting with integrity and that 20 years from now you'll be able to look back and know that you did everything right to the best of your ability.

One thing you said stood out to me though... I don't think a man with an abusive personality can do much beyond insisting that you're out of line to the extreme. Start with the assumption that he's right in all things and if you disagree with you, you're wrong. Go from there and suddenly everything he says makes sense. It's not right... it just makes sense.

 

[Bad Mama Jama]

: at least you have conducted yourself with integrity and the courts will also see him fully because of his behavior, which sounds quite nasty.

to you.

 

[JohnnysGirl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ceinwen Did anything come out of today?

Nothing.

I see them every other weekend and this is gonna be a hard fight to change that.

Court date in June.

I just can't believe he was gas-lighting me and pointing fingers at me for being x,y,z crazy-accusation right there in front of social workers. He's really insane.

: But if this were my own country I wouldn't blink and trust in the system. But he's a local (in high standing in his city) and I'm a foreigner (nothing) and the kids are getting harmed in the process of this unfairness....

I'm just not going to give up. One day at a time. Integrity. This too, shall pass. Those boys will know.....

 

[sugarmoon]

sometimes, having integrity really sucks though, doesn't it?

but, pp are right, it is the only thing you *can* do, and in the end, you will prevail, your boys will see their father for who he is, and you for who you are.

I'll be keeping you in my thoughts. How old are your boys?

 

[bluey]

I have nothing of value to say, just that I wanted to let you know I think of you and your boys every day. (hope that doesn't sound creepy, it's not meant to be - just remember you from our diapering days lol!)

 

[JohnnysGirl]

They'll turn 4 & 6 in August.

I met with the social workers again today, just me and the ones in my city. They felt that I really behaved very mature/graceful/with a lot of class, and that it was painfully obvious that my ex is still very much in a crisis and very emotional and angry/still-in-love with me. Their reports to the judge will reflect their opinions after having met me 3 times now, and him for those 3 hours this past Tuesday.

: Thank god one person in THIS country noticed that I am the mature parent taking the high road and he is the psychopath down in the gutter slinging mud and actin' a fool.

:

 

[guestmama9915]

That's great news!!

: Hoping for the best outcome!

 

[pinetree]

It may take time but truth does come out!!!