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at what age did you start having to guide your children? did you do it from birth? or was there a day when you found your toddler rideing your dog trying to play polo right next to your china cabnet where you said "all right, this isnt ok"?
 

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I'd guess I started actual discipline around 10 mos old? But it was more like *I* was trying to find ways for ds to do what he wanted, in a way that was acceptable to me. And at about 12 mos, he started being affected by explainations. I don't know that he understood them, but he was definitely more willing to change what he was doing when we explained to him why. I think it had to do with him knowing that we were being considerate of him. or something like that.
I did teach him to not touch the trash can at about 10-11 mos. It was before 12 mos, I remember. It was gentle, and I'd just call him to me when he went to the trash can (obviously no punishing or me being disappointed in him). If I had to do it all over again now, I'd probably just sanitize the outside of the trashcan on a regular basis and not even worry about him touching it. lol.
But there was never a time that I thought "oh, this isn't working for me. I better start disciplining." lol
 

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I don't remember a line in the sand. We've always had an ongoing dialog (okay, for a long while it was a monolog
) about expectations. For example, when my dd was tiny she would wake up SCREAMING if we weren't right there. My dh explained to her that we were always close, all she had to do was make a peep and we'd come running. What do you know? She stopped screaming and started peeping
We also taught her the safe way to get off the bed around 5 or 6 months. She had it down by about 8 months.

-Angela
 

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As soon as my DD got mobile with her commando crawling I had to start guiding her (disciplining?). I was flying by the seat of my pants back then as I had no game plan for it yet. At first I would say "no touch" or "no cords" when she'd make her way over to electrical cords and start chewing on them. I quickly realized this was too much negativity for my taste and just relocated or wrapped sheets around any cords accessible to her. It still took me a while after that to really come into my own with GD. I was so used to carrying/wearing a complacent newborn/infant around with me everywhere on my own schedule that it really took a while before I realized I needed to start letting my emerging toddler take some control. Every now and then I still slip up and just scoop her up when I am ready to go somewhere else. I am so glad she protests when I make this mistake because it quickly reminds me she is an individual with important desires and not just some handbag to haul about on a whim.

Sorry, this is getting off-topic. In response to your question.. I guess around 7 months? The only thing I can think of before that age was biting while nursing a few times before she even had any teeth. But I don't think I ever did anything about that. Mostly I just unlatched her while trying not to make a reaction that might scare her or make her bite again.

- KCMommy
 

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I had about the same time table as Deva. I think it was around 9 months. When DD began to crawl, diaper changes were no longer a fun time. She was crying and fighting me, and I didn't think all the conflict was good to have several times a day. So I taught her to stay in place for the change, then I taught her the words and the ASL sign for "all done," "finished." She learned to wait out the changes, have fun with me and help wipe, and then to crawl away when I was finished, and diaper changes were peaceful again in about 3 days. I know some parents will say this is not gentle-- but personally, I don't see screaming and fighting and running away several times a day over diaper changes you used to enjoy as gentle either-- so to each his own. But anyway-- if "discipline" means "to teach, correct." That's the first time I taught my daughter something that was "correcting her behavior."

Around 12 months she started learning not to touch things if I said they were hot....then she went though a phase where she would start to touch things and then say "Hot?" or "No?" and look at me quizzically, but then still touch the thing. Then she went through a phase where she would say "Hot?" or "No?" and look at me quizzically, and NOT touch the thing. Then she went though a phase where she'd look at a thing and say "No, no, no!" and walk away and find something else to play with. I'd say around 14-16 months she developed the self-discipline to actually not touch something when told "no" or "hot." But at 18 months-- a different type of "testing" behavior began, and I had to go back to teaching her "no" really meant "no." The spirit of the testing was very different than the curiosity she had at 12-14 months. You'll know it when you see it as you come around to the "Two Yearl Old" stage.

I say all this to say that how they will respond to teaching is a process for them, that will change over time, and for different reasons. Enjoy the miracle of teaching your child!

Good luck!

Faith
(Oh....wait. I just remembered.....Not pulling my earrings came before that!)
 

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It was a gradual thing. When they started walking and being mobile things got more interesting that's for sure.
 

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It was gradual for us too. We babyproofed our house pretty well but no matter how hard you try, as soon as baby is mobile and able to understand some words and deciding that Grandma's lamp cord is fun, you need to do "ouch. no touch. hurt baby!" and redirect. What's grandpa doing? Go get grandpa!

Probably the age when babies are mobile is the age you really notice yourself guiding... but of course you're giving the baby feedback on behavior, whether you realize it or not, from birth!
 

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there was definitely gradual guidance from the start, but the first time i felt he was really aware that he was doing something undesirable and i had to get creative about solutions was around 12 or 13 months.
 
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