Mothering Forum banner
1 - 17 of 17 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
14,840 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So, have you gotten negative comments on homeschooling or unschooling? How have you handled it? Do you have a favorite way to respond? I figured this might be a neat thread for new to homeschooling folks, or those who are struggling with negative people. Kristi
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
14,840 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
We have heard some negative comments over the years, but not a ton of them thankfully. We get more for unschooling really. It depends on the person or the comment as to how I respond.. and also my mood
The socialization questions I usually answer by saying "There are people everywhere in this world, not just in school. We get to know them by living in the world" or "We like that we have time to socialize because they arent in school. Sure makes visiting alot easier!"

For the "How will they learn blah blah... (usually its math they worry over) We always just say that math is everywhere, not just in a book. Math comes from handling money, and playing games, etc. When all else fails we just say "This is our choice, and it is what is right for us". I also find that being positive from the get go about it helps alot. "You homeschool?" "Yes, we love it!" "Is it hard to be with the kids all day?" "No not really.. we have alot of fun together" etc. Kristi
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
714 Posts
I had a ps teacher ask me why I wanted to hs. She was pg and cranky at the time :LOL I told her that I feel I am my son's best teacher. What school can offer him one on one or one on two learning?? What teacher could possibly better understand his needs and wants better than him mama??
I also tell ppl that this is what's right for us right now. Maybe in the future it won't be...who knows. PS just leaves so much to be desired right now. I do not believe in testing and that seems to be what ps is all about, KWIM?
Anyways...interesting subject!
:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
324 Posts
When we first 'announced' our intentions to our families, we asked them for their expertisse at the same time, and this seemed to cut down on negative reactions. For instance, when telling an aunt who is a nurse, we said, "We're going to be homeshooling the kids, so when they have anatomy questions, we'll know who to call." We found that even if someone doubts YOUR ability to teach your kids, they are usually confident with their own abilities.


Aside from family, we never get negative comments.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,547 Posts
We don't ever get negative comments. Usually we get comments from other children who wished they were homeschooling or excuses from parents as to why they aren't.

I do know that people have their own ideas of what "homeschooling" means and I'm pretty sure that most of the time it's much different than what we actually are doing. We're unschoolers but the kids say homeschooling just because it's easiest and I hate all the terms anyway. I have a feeling most think we are doing school at home bahhhhhhhahahaa!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
182 Posts
If the person that is asking me a question about hs'ing seems rude to me or will not stop asking the same question over and over again ( like socialization ) I will stop them in their tracks by asking them "...and this concerns you how again ? ", works every time

Don't get me wrong, I love answering questions about hs'ing but some people just get to me.....
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,758 Posts
The most common response to "We homeschool" is "I couldn't stand to be with my kids that long". To which I always say "that's sad."

I try very hard to come across with the "this is right for us" attitude and not look down upon public schoolers. For some reason though I seem to get a lot of jealous remarks and excuses as to why they AREN'T homeschooling.

I agree with the previous poster that being positive really helps. Saying with a sigh and shrug "yeah we homeschool" vs. a bright sunny smile and excited voice "yeah we homeschool" can make the difference between a positive comment and a negative comment.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,811 Posts
When most people ask me about homeschooling it is usually about socialization...I just calmly tell them not a problem.He is in more social situations than most kids.My son told my dad once when he asked Greg if he missed socialization at school.And Greg said what socialization.Mostly they just want you to sit down and shut up and don't move.And what little you do get is from mostly bullies calling you foul names or shoving you around.Not exactly the ideal social cues I want him to learn. Dad didn't have much to say about that one.Love Mylie xx
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
17,896 Posts
My MIL tends to criticize my choice in curriculum (go figure) and Ijust assure her thta many public schools use this (true or not) and that seems to satisfy (she is a PS teacger by the way) . If people are just being nosey jerks I tell them I will discuss it with them when they ask me to homeschool them.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
848 Posts
I had a former friend repeatedly tell me that the only reason people HS is because they are too lazy to get their kids up in the AM. I finally shut her up by agreeing with her ... I said "yep you caught me it was so much harder to spend 15 min getting thme ready in the AM than is is to teach them for 5-8 hours a day." that shut her up pretty quick, and I realized she was not the type of friend I needed in my life.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
655 Posts
We haven't really gotten negative comments about homeschooling, rather other moms say to me, "I could never do that." I am beginning to say: "That's because you're picturing our family slaving away over worksheets at the kitchen table for 6 hours a day - I couldn't do that either!" I say this brightly, and with a smile on my face. If they want to pursue it, they might ask me, "Then what do you do?" At that point I'll tell them that we don't use any set curriculum. We do projects which the children choose following their interests blah blah blah.

I don't name it unschooling to non-homeschoolers, and I don't explain unschooling philosophy. I just describe what we do, and this seems to not only satisfy, but impress most people. Actually, some of them say - Wow! I really couldn't do that! (Sigh)

Laura
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
12,839 Posts
I've gotten more negative implications and being "sized up" to see if I looked capable of recreating an entire public school inside my living room.

"I could never do that," is what I hear.

"Oh," and the conversation ending is another.

I also hear positive, supportive comments- like "so and so did that, and the kids are doing great."
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,922 Posts
Someone posted this here once and I copied it onto my computer--alas, I don't have the source (if it's you, speak up, 'cuz it's brilliant!!):

When asked "What about socialization?"

Well, we actually want her to have all the social advantages of school, so once a week, my husband corners her in the hallway, grabs her shirt and takes all her money. Then, we make sure that a total stranger calls her 'fat' or 'stupid' while we look on approvingly. We also make her eat her meals alone, not allowing her to sit with us "cool people" at the dinner table. This way, she's sure to get all those great socialization skills she's missing out on in public school."
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,758 Posts
Don't forget to make her raise her hand to pee only to turn her down when she asks. Don't forget to make her sit in uncomfortable furniture for eight hours a day , then make her do it again at home and do four to five hours of homework afterwards.

My dad was really drilling me on socialization . I was trying to have a reasonable discussion to share our different view points. After about twenty minutes I finally said "and how many times did you get a note from school that said 'Jenni was socialiazing in class' or 'Jenni was caught talking to others in the hall'. Is THAT healthy socialization ? or is that control ?" He hasn't mentioned it since.
 
1 - 17 of 17 Posts
Top