[ArtsyHeartsy]

I want to call my miscarriages something, besides angels. I am not religious so it would seem really weird to use that term or image, but I would like a term so I could get something done, jewelry or something to remember them.

What do you use to commemorate your losses, and do you have names? I was thinking of tree ornaments, but that's just for this time of year.

I have had 4 pregnancies and have one child. That's just weird to me....and nobody really understands it. I just want a personal reminder to myself and my dh.

 

[lisa_nc]

I call our son our forever baby.

 

[moonglowmama]

I I mostly only refer to my children by omission, such as "How many kids do you have?" me: "I have 2 living children." But I don't say that very often, to be honest. Most people are just being casual and they feel uncomfortable if you start talking about how many babies you've had that didn't make it. But, depends on the situation.

As far as commemorating my children, I have a pretty amber pendant that I picked up shortly after my 2nd miscarriage that looks like a womb shape to me. For me, it symbolizes the special time that I've shared with each of my children that have lived inside me, even if only briefly. It's a happy place.

I've also planted different gardens after some of my miscarriages. My favorite is planting tulips in December and seeing them come up in late Feb/ early March. That baby died near Christmas and wasn't born until February. And when I say "born" I mean shed died and it took 11 weeks before I completed the miscarriage.

 

[Vespertina]

:

"Forever baby" is pretty much it for us. No mention of heaven or angel. DH and I are nontheists, so none of that registers with us. No one has asked me recently how many children I have. If asked I'd say, "Two living children."

We're doing a tree ornament as well. We're going to make them this year.

 

[Fireflyforever]

I noticed on some of the older posts in this thread, a lot of mothers talk about their "spirit children". I don't know if that still has too many religious overtones but it's less specifically so than "angel". I am a Christian but don't consider my daughter an angel. I will sometimes call her sweet angel Emma but it's an endearment as I call her living brother and sister angels too (sometimes!). It's not a theological stance really. If I think about it, when I write my journal, which I do in the form of letters to Emma, I call her my forever baby so I guess that comes closest.

I'm considering a tatoo but am letting that one sit for a while.

 

[Sophiasmomma]

im so sorry for your loss.. I was DIJuly as well this is my 2nd MC in 9 months

when people I ask I say I have 2 living children so they "get it" that there was more
some people then ask others do not...
as far as rememebring them Im getting a necklace with all 4 childrens birthstones in it of the months they were supposed to be born
i think its a great way to rememebr them everyday

 

[mommato5]

I named my two miscarried babies. I do refer to them and my daughter as my angels, but I rarely talk about those losses. For some reason I feel differently about them now than I did before.

 

[ArtsyHeartsy]

Thank you for all of your responses. I am not sure if I would really say anything if someone asked me how many kids I have, but I really want to acknowledge them with some gesture(s). Last night at the store I found two red blown glass birds that were strung together with a ribbon, I thought it was a good way to remember them on Christmas, the two little birdies that flew away this year. I also like the forever baby idea. I think I will get a necklace with my kids' and some smaller little charms for them.

Thank you so much for sharing!

 

[Cuddlebaby]

I've just stared making bracelets and just this week decided to acknowledge my miscarriage (even in my sig!) with a birthstone for him/her. it was on the heels of Micah's birth so not much thought was given to my m/c. it feels good to realize it and give it some deserved meaning. just an idea for you. seems as if you were are down that line of thinking already

too bad any of us have to be on this path.