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Some days I am just not as engaged in my parenting as I would like to be. Some days I am REALLY tired, sometimes I am bored!

I want to be present for my daughter and connect with her (11 mos) - but sometimes I just want her to take her nap!

Any thoughts, suggestions, encouragement?
 

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I have days like this once in a while. Some are even much worse than "blah" they are, "I can't wait until bedtime!"days. I think it's just part of life. I think sometimes we feel like we should always just LOVE our job, but nobody LOVES their job all the time.

Here are a few things I do to spice it up;
Go outside
go visiting, or invite friends over
plan something to look forward to
have regular outings like playgroup or story hour

and my personal favourite...

Mommy's night out! (I know this isn't possible for a lot of moms, but try)
 

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Get in the tub. At least that's what worked for me and ds. Lots of bubbles and stay in until you run out of hot water. Now that he's 5 and dd is 1, I just ask him to play with his sister for a bit, take a break and have a cup of coffee and read a little. Then I'm almost always ready to be mommy again. It's like the 15 minute breaks I used to get when I got paid to work!
 

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Take them to the park and let them race around on their bikes while I read a book.

I realize this wouldn't work for you with an 11mo, but I just want to say that it's not terrible to be bored and tired when you have a baby. Being a parent can be boring and tiring. Please don't pressure yourself to feel present or engaged every minute. It's unrealistic, impossible, and it will only lead to needless guilt.

So if you have a blah day, you have a blah day. Just go with the flow. The next day you may feel more energetic.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by zinemama
it's not terrible to be bored and tired when you have a baby. Being a parent can be boring and tiring. Please don't pressure yourself to feel present or engaged every minute. It's unrealistic, impossible, and it will only lead to needless guilt.

So if you have a blah day, you have a blah day. Just go with the flow. The next day you may feel more energetic.
I can't agree with this more. Well said.
 

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Quote:

Originally Posted by mamak05
Some days I am just not as engaged in my parenting as I would like to be. Some days I am REALLY tired, sometimes I am bored!

I want to be present for my daughter and connect with her (11 mos) - but sometimes I just want her to take her nap!

Any thoughts, suggestions, encouragement?
What the other women have said. You can't and shouldn't entertain them 24/7. How, otherwise, will they learn to entertain themselves?

Take time for yourself. Make sure you and your husband have couple time - out of the house, without the baby, not talking about the baby - on a regular (weekly) basis. Have lots of sex. Read books that have absolutely nothing to do with parenting or domestic life. Define yourself as a woman apart from your child.

Being a mother is fantastic. But even a steady diet of rich chocolate cake can leave you wanting a pickle every now and again.
 

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I think we've all had those days! At 11 months, I used to take dd1 to the mall early in the morning and let her toddle and explore at will. Sometimes I was even able to browse through a store that interested me, too, lol! I'd suggest that you try to find something that occupies her (like the park or the tub) and lets you "off the hook" a bit which will let you recharge.
 

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I lay on the floor and let her crawl all over me, if I just need a break. Sometimes I can take being climbed all over, and sometimes not.

If we're both on the verge of losing it, I noticed that a good nursing session will calm us both down.

And the best thing, I think, is to look dc in the eye, and talk to her like she completely understands you, and say, "I'm sorry today hasn't been so great. Mama isn't doing well. Mama feels _______. I think you feel _______ because ________. I'm going to try to do better by _______. Let's start over. I love you."

If your kids are older, you could always try literally starting the day over by getting back into pj's, get back into bed, and waking up all over again. Have breakfast for lunch, and just start again. It's fun, it lightens the mood, and I really think it's a powerful symbol for a new beginning. One that kids can understand.
 

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It's just about to get better! I promise! I'm really not a baby person; I find them kinda boring really. (Sweet, very very lovable, but kinda boring.) But the toddler years are soooo much more interesting. They develop real personalities and can do stuff. It's awesome. That said, even with toddlers there are the blah days where I just wanna turn on Blue's Clues and veg out. I try to have a regular schedule that includes some activity in the morning....play group, library story hour, Gymboree (I love Gymboree), swimming lessons, music class, trip to the zoo or children's museum, something. (Not all at once, just different things we've tried.) I personally just do so much better if there is somewhere I plan to go every morning, a reason to get dressed, if you will. Social contact with other adults, change of scenery, etc. We go to the park or take a walk or go swimming a lot. (Stuff like that is easier with just one.) Taking baths together are always fun. I find it easier to be really present in the bath tub with her. Not a lot o other distractions. Reading books, jumping on the bed, doing yoga together, funny finger plays. Hang in there!
 

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Hi..

I can really understand how you feel. I do agree to what someone mentioned before, we can't be expected to have full energy all day long. My babies are everything to me but we also need our break from time to time.

I think putting them in the tub with lot's of bubbles is awesome. It's another way for my kids to bond and it's fun. At the same time, after they are done, they usually take a nice nap. I also have cartoons for them and I usually record all my shows,and watch them in peace during their nap time.

I also try to go out atleast once or twice a month with my husband alone and when you don't mention your kids atleast for 1-2 full hours it feel great. It's like you are dating again. We went out 2 weekends in a row on his day off and it was great. We have to alternate between the grandmas!
The part of leaving them kills me until we get to wherever we are going on our date then I'm ok. Once you've spent some nice quality time with your husband it's like a nice releif. When you get back with your kids, you feel brand new!
 
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