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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Never mind----I had a post but I really don't want "hugs" or anything like that I want a solution. I want to be pregnant.<br><br>
Thanks anyway if you were going to offer support.
 

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DH suggested asking friends and fellow parishioners to chip in and help us, but we'd only do that as a last resort. We are planning to use our retirement accounts and sell anything we can of value. Also, we're looking for other insurance policies, some of the public ones might offer IF coverage, but might vary by state. Or, if that doesnt work, we're hoping to find a policy that will let us buy an additional tear of coverage, but that's so exxpensive and usually only covers half of treatment price. We're seriously thinking of moving to a state that covers IF,in our case to maryland. There they mandate IF treatment coverage by insurance, but might be only if it's public insurance. I think that'd include blue cross, but not sure. My mom lives in MD so this is seriously something I'd think about. I could live with mom and get a job there to get insurance, and Dh could actually keep our house and his job here, and just travel up there to 'make his donation' IYKWIM. Or he could quit his job, and we'd both work there, and keep our house here, thanks again to staying with mom <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br><br>
It'd be hard and it really sucks donky ---- that we have to go through this. Our house needs new floors, cars are really in need of repairs/paint, but you know none of that will happen, all the money will go to treatments.<br><br>
My next door neighbor is accidentally pregnant again and she gets her pregnancy and birth covered, but they wont help couples like us have a child we desperatly want. If DH's problem had been with his prostate they'd cover that, but not treatment to help his screwey sperm! Ok, rant over. HTH.
 

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sell anything you can think of, 2ndmortage, cash in an IRA, beg family for money, see if you can find an insurance policy with an IF rider....<br><br><br>
we kept borrowing money and then a wealthy great aunt died and left me enough money to cover our costs! I went through two years of IF treatments ending in a succesful IVF/ICSI<br><br>
you never know where the money might come from - I never ever expected that inheritance
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
We don't have a mortgage or retirement fund to borrow from. Until my mc two months ago no one in our family knew we were ttc.<br><br>
I guess its just prayer and waiting.
 

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acupuncture, makes you feel better while you're waiting even if you have a bigger issue that it's not as effective for (absent or blocked tubes for instance.) And it helps a lot of problems! There is a great article in today's wall street journal about stress reduction being helpful in infertility (yoga, mediation, cognitive retraining - exercises to help your mind not say "I'm never going to have a baby", but instead say "I'm doing everything I can to become pregnant", journaling.<br><br>
And think creatively about how to make more money while you wait. Second job, cutting expenses, etc. The show cha-ching on cable the other day (first time I saw it) showed a family re-arranging expenses and taking on side projects for extra money. They made 3k in 2 months between earning and saving - more than many families can do, but say $500 month still adds up.<br><br>
Research what options you have in treatment and at home techniques (vitex or other herbs, use of progesterone supplements and/or baby aspirin in early pregnancy if you m/c often...) Researching can help you think about what your goals or chances might be. You can also start researching adoption if that's of interest to you.
 

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Here's something to check into<br><br><a href="http://www.inciid.org/article.php?cat=news&id=211" target="_blank">NCIID From the Heart Program</a><br><br>
I was in my doctor's office looking at a copy of Conceive magazine and I saw an announcement about a new program to donate cycles of treatment to those who are unable to afford it, and not covered by insurance. It's worth a shot.
 

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This is great that they're doing this, given the cost of IVF, in the tens of thousands per cycle. Thank you for postring the link. Not to hijack the post but, you wouldnt happen to know if there's any help out there for someone who only needs medicated IUI cycles. I know they're not nearly as expensive, but the cost can still get right up there. We have friends who spent several thousand dollars on several cycles and still dont have a baby. Thanks.
 

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What I would suggest in addition to all of the above:<br><br>
1. Do your research. I found that researching my situation and doctors online helped tremendously. Also, I was able to buy books cheap (used) from amazon.com on the subjects I was looking into. There are clinics that have online discussion boards where the docs will answer general questions regarding one's situation. Two are: <a href="http://www.haveababy.com" target="_blank">www.haveababy.com</a> and <a href="http://www.ivf.com" target="_blank">www.ivf.com</a>. Some clinics will give a free phone or in person consult for an initial discussion.<br><br>
2. Once you have located a doctor/clinic you want to work with, speak immediately and frankly to their finance person. Many larger clinics have programs to assist with some of the costs. This is not a total solution by any means but might help chip away at some of the mountainous costs. There are also clinical trials available at larger clinics and those might help you out financially, if you fit the profile of what they are looking for.<br><br>
3. Recognize that the months immediately after a m/c can be horrible, both in terms of emotions and what your body is going through. After my first m/c it took several months before my uterine lining came back. Very very scary. All while I was trying to keep from killing myself over the loss. Horrible horrible horrible. So give your body time to heal even as you research and ttc again.<br><br>
4. Yes, IF treatments are ferociously expensive. They are also one of the few areas of medicine where the consumer has some clout, largely because of being so poorly covered by insurance. Do your research. Know your condition(s) like the back of your hand. Find out which are the best doctors in the country to treat your situation. Find out what might be available to help you financially. All of that is free, if shocking (it always shocks me to consider how much we've spent to have children, and how much we'll have to spend to try to have more). Find out all you can, then you will know more clearly where you stand.<br><br>
5. If you've done all of the above, or if you determine that kind of course of action is not for you, or whatever you do, as you say, prayer and waiting. Lots of prayer and waiting. Not sure of your type of prayer or religion but there's an Old Testament story of the woman who became Samuel's mother who was so stricken with grief and so out of her mind crying as she prayed in the temple that the priest tried to throw her out, he thought she was drunk. He was an idiot but she counted on her prayers to help her stay sane if nothing else and they did.<br><br>
Take care...
 
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