[RockStarMom]

A mom in my childbirth class and I hit it off and our kids are now 3.5. We were all pretty close until the kids grew out of toddlerhood. Now the kids are very different and, for a variety of (very valid) reasons, my daughter is no longer interested in playing with her son. I feel that she's at the age that I need to respect her decision(I wouldn't want to be forced to spend time with someone I didn't want to, after all). How should I handle this? The other mom always wants to make plans and I wouldn't really feel right about telling the truth.

 

[4evermom]

One idea would be to think of things to do that don't require much interaction, like going to a museum or zoo, perhaps. I used to suggest we go to movies with certain adult "friends" that wanted to do something, the kind of people that I could only tolerate once a month.

:

 

[kibba]

While I don't force my daughter to play with kids she just doesnt get along to, I don't think I would avoid my friend. In real life you have to go to school with and work with people you wont always get along with. I think it's good to learn to tolerate others , even if they arn't into the same toys as us or have similar personalities. You can easily go to the park and the kids can go their seperate ways, a childrens museum, and so on. As long as the kids arn't downright mean to each other I don't see why they can't still see each other. I would just be careful in what I plan. Like I wouldnt invite her to my home where my daughter would have to share her toys or be forced to play with her dollhouse, blocks and so on with him. I might even invite someone else and another kiddo along, maybe a few kiddos. That way there's a friend for everyone to play with.

 

[newbymom05]

I have a similar situation and do a combo of what the PPs suggested--meet at the zoo or similar and hopefully w/ another mom/child.

 

[Ceili]

I agree that meeting out in a big space where the kids aren't required to interact with each other is a good idea. If you do invite more people along, I'd strongly suggest including at least 2 other kids. 3 kids together, when 2 of them aren't getting, along can lead very quickly to one kid getting left out and lots of hurt feelings all around.

 

[karemore]

I have one friend I really like but DD doesn't enjoy her child. I do what was suggested, rather than having them over or going to their house, we meet at library or bookstore storytimes, the kids listen to the reader, we chat, or we meet at the playground, the kids play with whoever they want, we chat, or we meet at Chuck E Cheese etc.

I save at home playdates for mom and kid pairs we both enjoy or group events.

 

[DariusMom]

I've had that happen with two different friends. I try to meet up with them w/o kids -- restaurant, lunch, whatever .. . don't know how feasible this is for you, though.