[OTMomma]

I need some new ideas for getting dd out of my bed. She is 5, and has co-slept her whole life pretty much- last year we bought her bunk beds, she slept in them for about a week it seems like, then she complained of nightmares and ended up back in with us. We even have a toddler bed in our room for her to sleep in, but every night she climbs back in with me- now the real problem is that I have a 3 month old and she doesn't much care if she lays ON the baby!!! BIG problem. I also only have a queen size bed, so dh, me, baby and dd all in the bed is like a can of sardines.

I don't want to be punitive, but is there some idea I've missed for getting her out of my bed without tying her to her bed? Dh says she's become dependent on me to sleep- she wants to sleep pressed up against me, practically under me all night.

Oh- she does have LOTS of nightmares, so ideas to deal with that much appreciated too!

TIA,

 

[nighten]

Does she have a favorite stuffed animal? Or would it work for her to fall asleep with you but then you put her in her bed? Maybe try moving the toddler bed into your room?

Or is she big enough for a regular bed? I'd think at five she would be, yes? Maybe you can get her a twin or full bed and that can be her big girl bed -- and if you or your husband could lie down with her initially to get her to sleep in that bed?

Sorry -- we're nowhere near this stage yet, but I hope other mamas here can help!

 

[crb]

My dd is 5. She sleeps w/ a light on (more than a nightlight, but pretty low level- but we had to wean her down to that level over time) and a couple of special stuffed animals. Sometimes this is not enough and dh goes in and sleeps w/her during the night. Her cousin has special music that plays all night long so if she wakes up she can orient herself and go back to sleep.
I have read that w/a new baby and also when kids go away to school they start having a lot less physical contact w/their parents - so maybe she is just trying to ease this transition? I think kids will naturally move into their own space by age 7 if not sooner, so I think you are closer to the end than the beginning!

 

[arratt]

Does she still wake up at night regularly? DD1 slept with me until she was 4.5when dd2 was born and I couldnt have them both in bed with me because dd1 moves too much. We gave dd1 her own sleeping space next to our bed and dh and I take turns laying with her at night until she falls asleep and then we move to our own space. When she does wake up occasionally, we will either go lay next to her until she falls back asleep or sometimes just hearing our voice is reassuring enough for her to fall back asleep. If your dd wakes up often or still nurses at night I dont know how well this would work though.
When we moved dd1 to her own space she became attached to a few special stuffed animals and a special pillowcase which now she needs to have in bed with her at night. Maybe letting your dd pick out a new pillow or something for her new space will make it special for her. Dd1 actually loves her own space now because she gets me or dh alone every night for awhile to snuggle up next to and talk with/read books/tell stories.

 

[rzberrymom]

How about DH cosleeping with her in her room? Maybe take the two twin mattresses from the bunkbeds and put them next to each other on the floor of her room. That would give her the closeness she's looking for, but also give you more room with the baby. It must be such a hard time for a little one, getting used to a new baby.

 

[OTMomma]

Thanks for all the thoughts! I decided to put one twin bed beside my bed, so I can climb in with her at bed time and when she needs me. The twin should be almost the same height as my bed, so I can almost cuddle her from my own bed, with baby on my other side. Dh is very annoyed and not happy with this plan- he feels she should have been sleeping on her own for ages now. But he's in there setting up the bed like I told him to right now anyway.

 

[Irish]

With my first, I found Maureen Garths childrens meditation books helped drastically with our 'bad' sleeper - it helped her to sleep more soundly and longer periods - over time it's how we got her comfortable sleeping on her own (although she'd still come for cuddles around 5am) and completely halted her nightmares. Starbright and Moonbeam were her favorites.

 

[nylecoj]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Irish With my first, I found Maureen Garths childrens meditation books helped drastically with our 'bad' sleeper - it helped her to sleep more soundly and longer periods - over time it's how we got her comfortable sleeping on her own (although she'd still come for cuddles around 5am) and completely halted her nightmares. Starbright and Moonbeam were her favorites.

How old was she when you started?

 

[Irish]

Quote:

Originally Posted by nylecoj How old was she when you started?

We started when she was 4 but the author developed the books to be used from the age of 3 on. Here is an excerpt from the back of Starbright:

Book Description

Driven by the desire to help her three-year-old daughter settle down into a peaceful night's sleep, Maureen Garth devised meditations that would help her daughter feel secure and cared for. Starbright is a collection of the stories Garth created as her child grew older. These innovative meditations are simple visualizations parents and teachers can read to their children to help them sleep, develop concentration, awaken creativity, and learn to quiet themselves.

"Unfortunately, a lot of children have trouble learning these techniques by the time they are seven or eight," writes Garth. "Relaxation and visualization, if taught at an earlier age, could enhance not only children's school work but other areas of their lives. Their concentration would improve; their artistic abilities would develop; they would feel more centered; their daydreaming could not only bring joy, but be constructive."

In her engaging, warm, and personal style, Garth teaches parents how to help their children relax, concentrate, and develop artistic and mental abilities, as well as enjoy a good night's sleep.