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I need to let this out. Thanks.<br><br><br>
Concerning you, I won't miss:<br><br>
1) YOUR SELFISHNESS.<br>
I have never known someone who's personal time came first and at the expense of your loved ones.<br><br>
2) YOUR COMPUTER.<br>
She's been your number one all along. I was lucky to come in third, if I even came in at all. The money you've spent on upgrading and redoing, the cost of your time--the late nights (often early morning), all day long, during your school time. It never ends. Your withdrawals on the rare vacations or outings. Pathetic! There's more to life than video cards, flat screen monitors, and online gaming. Too bad you'll never get the chance to see the world with me.<br><br>
3) DTD WITH YOU<br>
It. was. that. bad.<br><br>
4) CLEANING NAZI<br>
Our place is not a pig sty so stop acting like it! I will not miss you being over my shoulder barking orders. My life is not defined by the perfection of my living environment.<br><br>
5) BEING IGNORED<br>
All those nights I sat by myself in the corner of the room, in the corner of your mind so you could be with the one your heart really belongs to--your computer.<br><br>
6) YOUR INABILITY TO COOK A FULL MEAL<br>
True, I love to cook, but not everyday for weeks on end. It's pathetic that on the rare occassions that you did cook, you had to nag me the majority of the times to fix the sides. I guess it never occurred to you to open a friggin cook book or follow the directions on the box of instant mashed potatoes.<br><br>
7) BEING UNAPPRECIATED<br>
I paid attention. I took notice of the things you deemed important in passing conversation. I tried so hard to do small things: buy thoughtful gifts, cook your favorite foods FROM SCRATCH, give you the time to yourself that you wouldn't quit griping about. I did all of this because I loved you and wanted to surprise you. Your half-hearted 'thank yous' broke me. Do you know how I cried?<br><br>
8) HOW YOU "F-ING HATE PEOPLE!"<br>
This is a big one. You are aware that I am going into the profession of helping people. I love people and don't believe that every person is evil and out to get me. Why do you have to remind me four, five, six times a day, everyday, that you "f-ing hate people?" I refuse to live with this for the rest of my life! It disgusts me now that one of the reasons you were attracted to me in the first place was because I exemplified a warmth and genuine niceness. A people-hater such as you doesn't deserve that loving glow I shower upon my loved ones. It is with earnest hope that your heart will grow three sizes one day.<br><br>
9) YOUR DRONING<br>
You drone....a lot! You drone on in your all-important philosophical, snooze-inducing drunken conversations. You drone on and on about your computer, how the place isn't clean enough, how you're going to change your sleep habits, how i need to exercise more, how you "f-ing hate people." Take your droning elsewhere!<br><br>
10) YOUR FRIENDS<br>
With the exception of one, they are strange and not good-natured.<br><br>
11) YOUR VIOLENT VIDEO GAMES<br>
It makes me uncomfortable to be with someone who plays games that require you to shoot people night after night. The fact that you seek pleasure in killing "people" every evening with guns, shovels, grenades, knives, your hands, etc. disturbs me.<br><br>
12) HOW YOU NAP DURING YOUR SCHOOL TIME<br>
We don't have paying jobs because we are full time students. Therefore, your job is your school. It's not my fault that you stay up into the wee hours of the morning and then have to get up with dd four hours later. Stop being so selfish! It pisses me off to no end when everyday I watch our daughter for long periods of time so you can do your schoolwork only to find you taking a nap. Then, after she's gone to bed, I sit in my corner of the room being ignored so that you can spend time with your girlfriend while catching up on your homework.<br><br>
13) YOUR CHOICE IN MUSIC<br>
When I'm on my own, I can't wait to blast my country music while I dance and sing at the top of my lungs.<br><br>
14) YOUR DRUNKEN KISSES<br>
A passionate kiss is not smushing your lips as hard as you can against mine. And because you don't shave for days on end, your 'passionate' kisses hurt!<br><br>
15) I AM NOT A LEG. YOU ARE NOT A DOG.<br>
Stop trying to hump me!<br><br>
16) YOUR INNABILITY TO GIVE ME TIME TO MYSELF<br>
Taking our daughter out of the house for longs periods of time is a courtesy I extend to you on a weekly basis. You don't reciprocate a lot of things, and this is one of them.<br><br>
17) DIET NAZI<br>
When you met me, I had meat on my bones. More than likely, I will always have a little extra to love. I won't miss your hurtful criticisms at all. Oh, and when my belly was hurting the other day, it wasn't because I needed to exercise! You claim you stay on me because you are concerned about my health, yet you have no problem keeping junk food in the house and turning me down when I ask you to go for walks. Just because you can eat like a pig and not exercise yet manage to stay skinny doesn't make you the all-knowing health god!<br><br>
end rant. i feel better.
 

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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug"> mama<br><br>
Here is a list of things I don't miss<br><br>
1. The inability to make a grown up desicsion in a timely matter. Normal people do not need 4 months to decide what kind of mattress to buy. Or 5 hrs to decide what movie to watch on PPV that evening.<br><br>
2. The drugs. Plain and Simple<br><br>
3. Sex with someone who really has no concept that pleasure can be for BOTH participants.<br><br>
4. The inability to make financially descisions AT ALL.<br><br>
5. The video games. Hate them.<br><br>
6. Watching the Simpsons 500 times a week.<br><br>
7. Your druggie friends. I need intellectual stimulation.<br><br>
8.Your family. The racism and incredible stupidity of your parents and brother drive me over the bend.<br><br>
9. The way you forced me to make every descision but hated my choices, but still would not decide anything yourself.<br><br>
10. Your lack of willingness to learn anything new. Read a book.....PLEASE!<br><br>
11. Having to keep Kraft dinner in the house b/c you won't cook anything but.<br><br>
I thnk I could go on and on and on.....<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol">
 

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Cool rant, I feel better too!! Just knowing I don't have to deal with similar stuff anymore EVER is calm-inducing and appreciated. Our time is too valuable to be stuck with such negativity. I love your slant on the cleaning nazi, so true, you deserve better.
 

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I won't miss:<br>
1. YOUR PARENTS<br>
they suck. they told me they couldn'ts eee their grandkids as it was tax time come to find out they were in our city all freakin weekend....never called haven't seen the kids since August..MIL did say she might see the kids but called last week to say it was tax time they wouldn't be our way until June...I won't miss her lies and bullshyt.thank god they won't be MY family for much longer<br><br>
okay must add<br><br>
2. Your mistress Players Light 25 (pack)<br>
3. Your blowing money like no tomorrow but giving me practially none<br>
4. Cards and birthday gifts as you never got me any loved every party, gift, card I got for you but me.....<br>
5. Names, I have two given names not the other titles you tried to give me.<br>
6. The computers that mate while I sleep and procreate<br>
7. the car bills as you can't get an oil change on time, rear end everyone cause they are driving too slow...oh and my insane car insurance is now gone
 

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I won't miss my ex teaching the boys that they don't have to respect me. And he modeled that in every action and every word for the longest time.<br><br>
LOL about the music. I am bopping around to Madonna right now and I don't even care if it is tragically uncool <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1"><br><br>
And I agree with soooooo many of the other things listed already.<br><br>
Times like these I just love being the sole parent :-D
 

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Discussion Starter #6
It's empowering to rant among those who've btdt! I forgot to add these two:<br><br>
I will not miss how you pressure me and try to make me feel guilty because I'm not interested in, ahem, giving you oral pleasures even though I can count on one hand how many times you've done so for me.<br><br>
I will not miss how I was unable to sit next to you without you playing with yourself. How narcissistic of you to think that because you're 'excited', the mere sight of your 'excited' part would make me wanna jump up and do a 'Let's DTD!' dance.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">because I'm not interested in, ahem, giving you oral pleasures even though I can count on one hand how many times you've done so for me.</td>
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lol how true in my support group thats a common thread - lack of interest in your actual sexual pleasure... In 8 years in total I could not say stbx went downtown for than 30 minutes all together and I'd honestly think it was more like 15 minutes total...<br>
or for him when he'd request?<br>
I'd say<br>
"its not your birthday"<br><br>
Foreplay isn't a golf term.<br>
Orgasm is something that should happen together not when you get up to go to the bathroom...<br><br>
and please don't tell me I had the big O three times when I didn't once...
 

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Discussion Starter #8
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Shiloh</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7923037"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">lol how true in my support group thats a common thread - lack of interest in your actual sexual pleasure... In 8 years in total I could not say stbx went downtown for than 30 minutes all together and I'd honestly think it was more like 15 minutes total...<br>
or for him when he'd request?<br>
I'd say<br>
"its not your birthday"<br><br>
Foreplay isn't a golf term.<br>
Orgasm is something that should happen together not when you get up to go to the bathroom...<br><br>
and please don't tell me I had the big O three times when I didn't once...</div>
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oh man, have i been there. in the 3+ years we've been together, he's only give me the big O once. ONCE!!!! he actually told me that if i didn't service him, he would consider it grounds for a divorce. there's at least a 5-1 ratio of servicing him vs. dtd. what really disappoints me is that i had myself convinced that i wasn't in an abusive relationship. he's damaged my sex-esteem (if that's even a word) to the point that i will need lots of therapy just be a functioning sexual being again. and you better believe that my next relationship will be oral-free!
 

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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>LLobsterTV</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7923363"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">oh man, have i been there. in the 3+ years we've been together, he's only give me the big O once. ONCE!!!!</div>
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Double the time, and subtract one O from the total equasion. That's what I had <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: I FAKED EVERY ONE OF THEM. At first I thought it was a me thing so I didn't tell him, then it went on for so long that I didn't have the heart to tell him that it just wasn't workin' because I had lied about it for like 5 years. I love how after he was done, he'd be like "so how many times for you" As if i was capable of Oing multiple times within.. uhhmm...a whole 2 minutes<br><br>
Lets just say, I have a new fondness for a $100.00 peice of *cough* equipment. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biglaugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="laugh">:
 

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Discussion Starter #10
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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>MissSavannahsMommy</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7924991"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Double the time, and subtract one O from the total equasion. That's what I had <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">: I FAKED EVERY ONE OF THEM. At first I thought it was a me thing so I didn't tell him, then it went on for so long that I didn't have the heart to tell him that it just wasn't workin' because I had lied about it for like 5 years. I love how after he was done, he'd be like "so how many times for you" As if i was capable of Oing multiple times within.. uhhmm...a whole 2 minutes<br><br>
Lets just say, I have a new fondness for a $100.00 peice of *cough* equipment. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/biglaugh.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="laugh">:</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/ROTFLMAO.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rotflmao"><br><br>
this is me too!!!! i always, always, always fake. my counselor says i should tell dh, but i won't. there's no point if my goal is to stay amicable, yk? i always 'have' at least 2 because he's so amazing or something like that. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/rolleyes.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="rolleyes">
 

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ladies, it does get better. While the O may not come everytime, my new husband will stay with me, instead of jumping up to the bathroom. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> At least that way, there is mutual involvement.
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>boobybunny</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/7927363"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">ladies, it does get better. While the O may not come everytime, my new husband will stay with me, instead of jumping up to the bathroom. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> At least that way, there is mutual involvement.</div>
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Pppssshhh i'm not asking for an O everytime. Once a year might be nice <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/Sheepish.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Sheepish">: It's good to know it does get better!!!!<br><br>
No really, honestly, I think if i told him we'd be able to work together so certain things were achievable. I just don't want to open that can of worms b/c then i'd have to explain why I lied for so long. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/redface.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Embarrassment">
 

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I just want someone who wants me to have the big O.<br>
And I didn't even fake *much blush* someone who cares that its me in bed with them.... not feeling like some blow up doll..<br><br>
hmm got to find me an extra 100 bucks.,
 
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