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...of <i>you</i> being all disgusted and disappointed and downheartened because I'm having another boy? Really?<br><br>
I don't even know <i>any</i> you well, and only cordially greet you whenever I see you. Ok, so maybe if you were a grandparent or some other person whom is really in my and my kids lives (like, ohhhh, say...my husband!? ... I cut my preteen neice some slack too....) I'd totally get your wanting to me to have a girl and needing to wrap your head around my having another boy (the third boy in my family recently, incidentally after decades worth of girls)...and I'd understand...<br><br>
But I don't even see you on a regular basis, and when I do, merely say hello, and keep moving. Why do you care if I'm having another boy? Why does it seem that the common theme over the weekend is, "Awwwwww, let's pity Sonya for having another boy!!! Pooooooor thing!"<br><br>
Newsflash (and thanks to the handful of folks who actually did this) : TAKE A CUE FROM MOM!! OR ASK HER! If mom seems to be cool with the umpteenth boy, (and this is ONLY the second) then YOU SHOULD BE TOO!! Especially if you have no real involvement in her life on a regular basis! OR <i>ask</i> me how I feel about it!<br><br>
Really, why does this concept seem to be somewhat of a rarity? Is the rudeness behind it really that hard to figure out? Is it so hard to see that comiserating with mom is a tad "off" when mom <i>isn't</i> wallowing in anguish?<br><br>
Ok, i just needed to get that out. I'm good now.<br><br><br>
and PS:<br>
no. I'm NOT going to keep trying till I get a girl either...how bout we take some time to appreciate <i>this</i> pregnancy and get through it and welcome this little boy in the world before we push him aside and think of futuer pregnancies, huh? And thanks but I've had enough of pregnancy, and I'm not going through this anymore on purpose. Thanks for throwing out that obvious "solution" to the "problem" though, because, of course otherwise I'd never have figured it out. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">
 

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Yep. I referred friends to this blog post:<br><a href="http://www.alittlepregnant.com/alittlepregnant/2008/03/here-is-a-super.html" target="_blank">http://www.alittlepregnant.com/alitt...s-a-super.html</a><br>
It is a great, great post!!<br><br>
I love the idea of a second boy, but I feel like I'm disappointing everyone. Even the nurses and midwives and ultrasound techs are like "oh...you already have one of those at home". Weird. I guess people just feel really comfortable with one of each. Then, if you go for a third they don't have to wonder if it's because you really wanted one of the other sex.
 

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I'm so tired of everyone saying "I hope you get a girl!". I wish they'd say "I hope you get a baby who sleeps through the night!" because that would be 10000x more awesome than being able to pick the gender. It's really nobody's business.
 

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weird.<br>
we're expecting a second boy too and the only responses i've gotten from friends and family have been: oh, good! (ds) will have a playmate!
 

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I think people are generally incapable of thinking before they speak. We're pregnant with third, and we won't find out gender. We have 2 girls "already" - and truth be told, my DH, and both sets of grandparents are hoping for a boy, but I am not. Our lives would be soooooo much simpler if we have another girl. (separate bedrooms/bathrooms? new toys?) But, one possible reason for the comments that is getting glossed over: when the kids are all one gender, then the household "seems" lopsided, so it's "natural" to feel sorry for that the lonely parent (in your case, mom - in my case, dad). I admit that it sometimes crosses my mind, but the REALITY is that I think that my DH is so lucky to have 2 little girls who idolize him, and I think that you moms of boys are so lucky to be able to teach little boys a thing or two about being good to women!<br><br>
Anyway, I'm digressing now. When our second DD was born, I don't think we got any feedback about her being a her. But like the pp said, they have playmates now! Now, that we're expecting another sibling, it's everyone's business. I do think it's somewhat ridiculous for all the hoping and speculating - the sex of my baby is already defined. No amount of wishing in the world will change it now!! My oldest daughter says "God knows that we really want a girl, so that's what he'll give us." I want to respond "Maybe he'll give us a boy because we *need* balance with a boy", but she's 8, and you can't rationalize God's decisions with a child!<br><br>
I probably didn't make any sense - the girls are pestering me now <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"><br>
--janis
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Hollin</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11636067"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I'm so tired of everyone saying "I hope you get a girl!". I wish they'd say "I hope you get a baby who sleeps through the night!" because that would be 10000x more awesome than being able to pick the gender. It's really nobody's business.</div>
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<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lol.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lol"> Totally!!!!!<br><br>
Everyone wants me to be having a girl- girls do not run in the family so I'm really expecting another boy which is fine by me!! As long as the baby has 10 fingers, 10 toes, 2 eyes, and one nose I'm peachy<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"><br><br>
BUT, it would be easier to have another boy- no new clothes, toys, etc.<br><br>
I wish I could duct tape everyone's mouth shut so I don't have to listen to the mindless dribble that spews from their mouths<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/irked.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="irked">:
 

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Thanks for the link to the blog. Very enjoyable!<br><br>
Yeah, I get the "Are you hoping for a girl this time?" question a LOT. It is annoying. I find it bothers me more coming from family than from strangers, though. My ILs assume the *only* reason we are having a third is because we were "trying" for a girl, which just goes to show that they do not LISTEN to us or know us at all. We had been planning on having at least 3, right from the start, whatever genders they turned out to be.<br><br>
But, the ILs can't even fathom this. MIL keeps telling us about this family they know who had 5 girls (or boys, can't really remember which) because they "kept trying" for the other gender. As if having 5 kids is such a terrible thing. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"><br><br>
EVERY time they ask a question like this, we have said over and over that we are not trying for a girl. We just wanted a third child. Yesterday, FIL asked dh if we're going to have another one after this one. Dh said he didn't know (because we don't know yet), we would wait and see after this one is a bit older. Then FIL asked "What if it's a girl, will you still have another one?" And dh told him our decision didn't depend on the sex of the baby. They are OBSESSED with us having a girl this time around. I don't get it. They have 2 grandsons and 2 granddaughters, so what difference does it make?<br><br>
And, my 7 yo neice came right out and told me she didn't think we should have another one after this one, because that was too many. Now, I don't really take anything a 7 yo says to heart, but I'm pretty sure she did not come up with this idea herself, and is only repeating what she's heard from MIL and/or SIL.<br><br>
And, although dh swears he doesn't have a preference, he's also positive we're having a girl. Ds1 really wants a baby sister. I find myself rooting for a boy just because I feel like somebody should be! Plus, it'll be fun to have "3 Musketeers."<br><br>
Then again, if we have a girl, I think we WILL have a 4th child just to prove to the ILs once and for all: See, we really didn't have another one just to get a girl! (okay, not really, but the thought has crossed my mind)
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>ainh</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11635697"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I guess people just feel really comfortable with one of each. Then, if you go for a third they don't have to wonder if it's because you really wanted one of the other sex.</div>
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Maybe, but when you are expecting your 2nd and the baby is the opposite sex, then you have to deal with comments about how you can be finished having children now that you have the perfect "one of each" family. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"> We just can't win! I don't understand why being in the presence of a pregnant woman renders some people incapable of thinking before they speak.
 

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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>tabasco</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11638256"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">Maybe, but when you are expecting your 2nd and the baby is the opposite sex, then you have to deal with comments about how you can be finished having children now that you have the perfect "one of each" family. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"> We just can't win! I don't understand why being in the presence of a pregnant woman renders some people incapable of thinking before they speak.</div>
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Yeah, and then they will assume the third one was an "oops." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll">
 

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Ohhh... don't even get me started on this. I've had many rude comments from people which is why we're keeping #5 a secret for awhile. I'm just not "in the mood" to hear it. Honestly, I'm so hormonal right now that I'm afraid I'd snap at someone and I don't reall want to do that either (even though they may deserve it).<br><br>
Really, it's sad how our culture, as a whole, views children as a burden and any more than 2, maybe 3 children (but only if you need to try for that "girl" or "boy") as "crazy". UGH! Why, oh why, can't people get past their own uncomfortableness enough to *think* that *just maybe* this family WANTS more children??!<br><br>
Okay, I'm done.
 

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I plan to tell everyone that we found out the sex during our ultrasound and it's another boy and we're very happy to be having the third musketeer. That way everyone can just get over themselves and quit with all the "maybe this time you'll have a girl" like somehow one of us is defective because we have two boys. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"> I just want a healthy baby. Would I like to have a girl? Sure. But frankly, I'm happy to be having a baby. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">
 

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We have 10 nephews and cousin-nephews on DH's side, and 1 coming up on my side, so everyone keeps joking with us that this one "ought to" be a girl... but they are going to have to wait till December to find out!
 

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<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">
<div>Originally Posted by <strong>Hollin</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11636067"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I wish they'd say "I hope you get a baby who sleeps through the night!" because that would be 10000x more awesome than being able to pick the gender.</div>
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Completely in line with you here <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up"> I think I would cry happily for days if this one is a sleeper!
 

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I got SO SICK of sorry its another boy.... I bought this<br><a href="http://i119.photobucket.com/albums/o130/jeanaspictures/Newcamera012.jpg" target="_blank">http://i119.photobucket.com/albums/o...wcamera012.jpg</a><br><br>
I LOVE my boys and honestly I would take 12 boys over having to go through just ONE of my miscarriages. ALL babies are a blessing. I AM the QUEEN of my home. I dont have to deal with any homone attitudes. I have 3 very mommas boys ( tough he-man type) I love my life <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/joy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="joy">:
 

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<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
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<div>Originally Posted by <strong>JBaxter</strong> <a href="/community/forum/post/11640525"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a></div>
<div style="font-style:italic;">I got SO SICK of sorry its another boy.... I bought this<br><a href="http://i119.photobucket.com/albums/o130/jeanaspictures/Newcamera012.jpg" target="_blank">http://i119.photobucket.com/albums/o...wcamera012.jpg</a><br><br>
I LOVE my boys and honestly I would take 12 boys over having to go through just ONE of my miscarriages. ALL babies are a blessing. I AM the QUEEN of my home. I dont have to deal with any homone attitudes. I have 3 very mommas boys ( tough he-man type) I love my life <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/joy.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="joy">:</div>
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Love it! And I totally agree!! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/thumb.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="thumbs up">
 

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For what it is worth....contratulations on the impending arrival. I get much the same thing....I have 2 girls and everyone keeps telling me I guess you want a boy huh? I chose not to find out in ultrasound because frankly I dont give a *amn kwim? I would love a boy because we dont have one, and I would love a girl because both my girls have been such a blessing that I would never change anything about them including their gender. As far as I am concerned, a healthy baby is what matters and is a GIFT. When people ask me what I want which I really consider rude....I just look them straight in the eye and tell them "I just want a happy healthy baby and I dont care if it is a boy or girl. I am lucky I am able to bear children and they are all a blessing!". That shuts them up.
 

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Frankly I'd be overjoyed to have another boy. People keep seeming to think I want a girl and how neat it is to have one of each <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"> Honestly I don't know why it matters so much to others.
 

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I have a DS and am expecting a girl. So of course everyone says "now you can stop" or "oh your family is complete now." <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="/img/vbsmilies/smilies/eyesroll.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="roll"><br>
We were planning on 2 kids, so we are done and we're thrilled that DD is coming- BUT we're thrilled because we wanted a *child* and she's healthy. I would have loved 2 boys- my DS is the light of my life, I can only imagine what fun 2 would be.<br>
Anyway- people are stupid. Pregnancy seems to bring out the stupidest comments from random people.
 
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