What to do about hitting/throwing?

540 Views 2 Replies 3 Participants Last post by nova22, Jun 26, 2004

Mindful Mom

Discussion Starter · Jun 25, 2004

I'm sure this has been addressed before, but I'm having one of those rare moments when BOTH kids are sleeping at the same time -- I know it will only last a few minutes and I don't have time to search the archives!!

Ean is 27 months old and has suddenly started hitting. Mostly he hits me and Zoe, but occasionally asks about hitting other things. For example, he'll come up to me and ask "hit the tv?", "hit the floor?", "hit the couch?". It doesn't seem to stem from agression (he's not angry when he does it) -- it's more like he's experimenting with actions and reactions. I don't usually react when he hits the floor or the couch, but I can't let him hit people or things that might hurt him or break. I *know* he's doing it to test my reaction, but I don't know how to change my reaction -- particularly when he hits me or Zoe.

He does the same thing with throwing -- he has great aim and it's often directed at Zoe's head!!!

Any suggestions for letting him know his behavior is unacceptable?

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WitherB

· #2 · Jun 26, 2004

Well, my son does this as well -- more like he's just "testing" rather than hitting out of agression. We've found that saying "no" or even expressing pain just makes him do it more (and think it's funny, as he doesn't understand others' pain at this point). Instead, I've found that showing him how to touch nicely and saying "gentle please" works wonderfully. We've also clapped and given him praise when he is gentle. He loves positive feedback!

At some point, I plan to give him "time outs" for hitting/aggressive behavior. He just seems too young right now -- he thinks I'm playing when I put him in his room and close the door.

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nova22

· #3 · Jun 26, 2004

My ds is 17 months and doesn't talk much, and it's hard to get certain things across to him (like NO HITTING). Instead of saying "no hit" we say "touch gently", then we hold his hand and show him how to touch nicely. I thought it was all going in one ear and out the other until he started pounding on my 5-month old last night. DH said "No, touch gently" and instantly my son started patting my daughter nicely on the head instead of hitting her.

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