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What to say to other parent (re: no playdate) ?

589 Views 7 Replies 5 Participants Last post by  sarahmae1
My DS wants to go and play over at his friends house this comming week. He went over there to play a few times last year, but due to a change in circumstances I no longer feel comfortable with him going over there. What should I say to his friends mom, without making the situation uncomfortable?
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I'm sorry, we're busy.

DS is at a stage right now in which things go better with play dates at our house.

We have the flu.

We're slowing down and going a bit more family- centered, so we are not doing many playdates right now.

There are lots of answers, but really, do you want to maintain the relationship? How old is your child? Do you need to find words to tell your child or the other parent?
This is for my 8yr. old. I don't mind if my DS continues to be friends w/ her DS. I don't mind if he comes over to play here sometimes. I just am looking for suggestions as to what to say to the other mother. Thanks.
"I feel more comfortable hosting playdates here." works for us.
I'm not sure, as I have not been in this situation, but maybe just be honest without laying blame?

The only example I can think of is this- We are tv free, and DS had a new friend who kept inviting him to play video games. I ended up saying to the parents, "We're media free, and though I'm happy for the kids to play, I do not want DS playing video games or watching tv. I know that does not work for all families, so I am happy to host the playdates at my house."

Or, if it's a supervision issue, say something like, "We're in a real mischievous period, and I would feel better if I was keeping tabs on DS instead of expecting this from another parent."

If this person isn't YOUR friend, then you don't have to be completely candid; you can present it as your issue that you are dealing with, and therefore, you would just appreciate their cooperation.
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Another idea is to suggest that you meet at a neutral place like the park or something.
I'd be honest provided it wasn't something too embarassing for her (ie: "Your house is too dirty" or something like that)
Thanks for the ideas so far. It is a situation w/ her, that is not something that is talked about. Park meet up sounds good when it gets nicer out - is only 30F here today.
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