[punkrockmommy]

My x has a new girlfriend. I am having a hard time with it not because i want to be with him anymore!!! <God N0!!!> But because i dont trust his judgement. He is living with her and there fore my daughter stays there when he has her. Now i have never met her one on one but she looks trashy. And last time he picked her up with his girlfriend she looked like she had bloodshot eyes.

: Now i know i am sounding judgemental but he has said stuff also like when they started dating, he told me that she wouldn't even get up to make her 4 yro breakfast even after he asked her to. He has also told me that she doesnt have custody of her kid. I am seeing HUGE problems with my daughter being around such a person. But i cant tell him who to date, and now he is talking about marring her. what do i do? I love to have my daughter around alternative people, people of all walks of life but i do not want her around drug addicts or just plain bad for you people. Also when ever my X asks her to do anything she says "Yes sir"

: WTF is that about? She acts all subservent it is discusting. What can i do?

 

[mama2toomany]

When I met my dh's ExGF I am pretty sure she prolly thought I was an odd ball too... I tried very hard to get along with her and reasure that I had only good intentions and loved her son.

I baked cookies with dss for her.. always made mothers day presents and the whole 9 yards to make her feel like I wasn't trying to replace her.... it never worked. Now as one of dss's parents I feel kind of silly for trying so hard to be-friend her... she was set against me the moment she met me.

I would try to be open mama.... and find out as much info on this new women as possible... inquireies... maybe tell your ex you would feel a whole lot better if you could get to know her!!!

 

[annarbor931]

This is such a touchy subject, but I would wait and see. I sucks to not have control, but you have to assume that he will still take good care of your child with or without the GF. I think if there are substance abuse issues, then you have to keep your eye out for problems. What is your custody agreement anyway? How much time does she spend over there?

 

[punkrockmommy]

It depends on the time, I have been letting him take her whenever. He is supposed to have supervised visits the place he was staying before he was staying with the girlfriend of a mutal friend so i trusted the situation. Our friend would not be with a person that was not trustworthy or didnt take care of her kid. So i trusted that situation, this one i don't at all. It scares me i dont trust my STBX judgement at all in most if not all situations. He says on thing does another, lies, hangs out with "bad people". People that are really sketchy and that scares me. What is my DD going to be around?
Is there any legal action i can take?

 

[TAC]

why did your x have supervised visitation, and does he still have supervised? What happened with that?

 

[annarbor931]

My X has supervised visitation too. My lawyer told me not to go against the court order and allow unsupervised time, unless the order is changed first by the court. So, if your STBX has supervised PT, then he should not have it with strangers present and no responsible parties there to "supervise". I would request a visitation schedule be set up with a neutral party, if possible.