[User101]

My six-year-old has been making some odd comments about our lifestyle lately. The other day he wanted "a tissue" so I reminded him where the hankies are. He said "I wish we could afford paper tissues."

He made a comment about paper towels, too. We've talked about caring for the earth, reduce/reuse/recycling, etc, but he's really fixated.

I'm having some other issues too that I will probably also post in the childhood forum, but I'll put them here as well.

He has broken two dressers. Today I bough a sterlite plastic set of drawers. He was all upset that "people" were going to "make fun of him" for not having a proper dresser. I asked what people, and he said "friends." I asked why they would make fun of him, and he said he thought they would think we didn't have enough money to buy a "real" dresser. I tried explaining that this was a real dresser, but that in a way he was right. He had broken two dressers, and we can't afford to keep replacing them, so this would have to do for now. He finally asked if he could keep it in his closet, which we were going to do anyway. Then he said he would make sure to shut his closet door when he had friends over.

He is making me so sad!

Another issue we're having is chemicals. He has a hissy fit about them. Before he gets a drink, he'll say, all panic-y, "There are CHEMICALS in the sink, are there?" He's freaking out. Where did I go wrong!?! I mean, we've talked about chemicals and explained why we do organic food and everything, but we don't dwell on it. He was practically in tears when we had to have the termite people come, because he thought we were all going to die.

Where am I going wrong?
How can I help him understand the why of natural family living, and not feel deprived? We're not rich, but we have what we need and some extras. He takes cello lessons, he's in cub scouts, he goes to camp, he's taken swimming lessons. He's just not living the joyfully simplistic life I've imagined my child would be living!

 

[onlyboys]

I don't think you're going wrong at all.

Six was a strange age for my oldest boy... Very strange, indeed. I'd wait it out, and keep demonstrating those things that you feel are important.

My first grader once told me, "If you worked, like Aunt L, we'd be able to be richer." I just said, "Yes, you're right, we'd have more money."

My 3rd grader, same child, said to me last week, "If you worked, you'd not be home to care for us. I'm glad you are home with us."

I think it's just patience and understanding through those times when he or she is working out his or her place in the universe.

Good luck to you!

 

[User101]

That;s very reassuring, thank you! It didn't even occur to me that other little six-year-old guys might be going through it too!

 

[kerc]

ok so if you were rich....how would you feel about replacing dressers over and over and over again? It's not a money issue, it's a respect issue to me.

 

[root*children]

My DS is only 5, but he's had some of the same type of comments. If he ever does, I just let him know all the things we have and we do that other people can't.

For example:
Q: Why don't we buy our clothes at __ (Walmart, JCPenney, etc.)?
A: When we buy clothes for cheaper, you can have more clothes than they do, and people who spend alot of money on clothes don'y let their kids get dirty! Can you imagine how sad you would be if I didn't let you play in the dirt??

Q: Why don't you work like other moms do? Then we could have more money.
A: Because all the extra money I'd make would be spent for you to have to go to daycare/school, and you wouldn't get to play as much or do the things *you* wanted to do. We couldn't take cool trips, or go visit our friends nearly as much. etc. etc.

He's so rarely said things like that, b/c we love to just comeback with all the awesome things about thrifting, saving money, etc.
HTH!

 

[User101]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kerc ok so if you were rich....how would you feel about replacing dressers over and over and over again? It's not a money issue, it's a respect issue to me.

True!