[Birth Junky]

DH suggested that I leave (5-month-old) DD with him overnight with EBM and a bottle while I go out with the girls for a bachelorette party (a few of them are spending the night in a downtown hotel, and invited me to join them). As much as I would love to join in the overnight fun, I don't feel comfortable with the idea of being away from her for that long. I'm also not sure how well she would sleep away from me; we cosleep, and even though she sleeps through the night (6-7 hours at a stretch) most nights, I'm guessing that sleeping with just papa in the bed would probably throw her off.

His suggestion got me wondering, though, what other moms have done . . . when was the first time you left your baby overnight with your partner?

 

[muckemom]

My little sister went in labor with my nephew when DS was 2 months old, I pumped enough for 2 days and went. It REALLY bolstered DH's confinidence.

 

[lrlittle]

DS is 6 months & I still haven't. I don't think either of us is ready.

 

[danigrl]

That's a tough one! I had to leave my ds for a bachelorette party for 2 nights / 3 days, and it was the HARDEST thing to do

DH did great, though

I missed ds soooooooooo much, and I honeslty don't think I would do that again.....at least not for a while. Good luck, and I'm sure you will have a great time or at least try to anyway...

 

[sarabecca]

DD is 9 months and I haven't done that. But I have zero desire to do it so it's not an issue. There was an overnight bachelorette party that I was invited to and I just didn't go. I didn't really want to go anyway, baby or no baby, so it wasn't a big deal! Plus, dd never took a bottle so it wasn't even an option! I say if you're not comfortable doing it, then don't

 

[The4OfUs]

When I went to the hospital to have our second child (6 weeks ago)...our first one was 2-1/2 years at the time, and it was the first time I'd been away from him for more than about 12 hours.

I have no desire to be away from my kiddos for longer than a few hours to recharge every couple months...just a massage, or a little shopping for me, or a movie alone, that's all I need.

 

[KarenEMT]

I did not leave DS#2 overnight until last night

My parents took both boys to their cabin overnight and then to an amusement park. DS#2 did not self-wean until January and I would not have left him with DH under anything less than a total emergency up to that point. I just talked with my mom and he did absolutely fine last night, although slept much of the night with his big brother.

 

[earthmama369]

DD had her first overnight away from me when she was 19 months old, when ds was born. She spent the first night with a friend and the second with dh.

DS spent the very first night of his life away from me. We both had some complications, so dh spent that first night in the special care nursery with him while I recovered in our hospital room.

 

[PatchyMama]

Neither of my girls have ever been away from me overnight

I have gone out to moms night outs and come back at 1 or 2 am, but never gone entirely overnight.

Follow your gut, if you arent comfortable with it, chances are you wont be able to relax and have a good time anyway. Can you go out with them for a bit and just come home when you get antsy?

 

[hookahgirl]

I dont remember the exact date.....
maybe at 6months?? I went to a concert, I was home by 1 am(left at 7pm)......BUT
I was soooooo engorged by 10pm, I was miserable the rest of the time.I was pumping from 10pm on, but because there wasnt really any where private, and some of my girls were hanging out with me, I couldnt pump enough to really feel relived. There was too much pressure(no pun intended)
Something to think about,even if you want to go, you may want to not stay the night!!!

 

[paxye]

never...my boys are 4 and almost 2.... they are not ready to be without me overnight and I would't enjoy it either....

 

[Willowrose]

We have a 5 year old, a 3 year old and a 6 month old and neither of us have ever left them overnight. Unless it was a necessity, I would never leave them overnight.

 

[kvan]

My ds is 2 1/2 and I haven't left him even for bedtime. He is weaned, but from my perspective, bedtime is a really important time for me to be present. I could probably go out after he was asleep and have dh do any nighttime parenting, but I just haven't found anything great enough to make me go out without my family after 8pm

 

[BlueStateMama]

DS, once at 20 months - I was in the hospital having DD. And not yet for DD (and no plans to...she's my nursling

)

 

[DQMama]

I was in a wedding when dd was 3 1/2 months. It was out of town and I was the matron of honor so I had to throw a bachelorette party, got roped into doing the shower, attended the rehearsal dinner, and then of course the wedding. Dh only went to the wedding but he stayed in town with me for the other events. He took care of ds and dd, and I stayed at each event for only a little while and then went back to the hotel to nurse dd. My dad (who lives in the town that the wedding was in) kept them for the wedding, and same thing, we left early so I could nurse. I had a lot of fun and the kids did great but I was not away from them overnight.

If the party is far from where you live, maybe your dh and baby could stay in a separate hotel room, if money is not an issue.

 

[chiro_kristin]

I haven't and I wouldn't for quite a long time.

 

[alegna]

I haven't yet and don't plan to soon. For that matter dh hasn't been away from her at night ever yet either. Why would I want to? I LIKE spending time with my child and my husband. I would not enjoy an all night party without them.

-Angela

 

[Lolafanana]

i left dd overnight with grandma at 3 months. it was necessary and could not get around it. grandma and dd both had a great time. for us, it was fine but of course, i was soooooo worried all night. do what feels right for YOU.

 

[mommyto3girls]

First time I left Maia she was 20 months and I was rushed to the hospital with a small bowel obstruction, I stayed in for 11 days

dh brought her to the hospital to nurse once a day. from 24 months to 30 months I spent 90 days in the hospital. I never imagined we woudl spend 90 days apart in her entire childhood, let alone in 6 months at age 2. NOw, at 3 1/2 she stays a few nights at my parents here and there and loves the special attention from them.

Sage was in NICU for 2 weeks, but I was in the hospital also so they brought her to me to nurse for every other feeding (every 6 hours) and sometimes I was stable enough to go to her to do her tube feeding on the other feeds. I was also in the hospital for a week at 5 months and a week at 8 months, but I have never voluntarily left her at night.

 

[Birth Junky]

Wow--so many responses, so quickly!

Just to clarify, I am definitely NOT planning on spending the night away from baby girl; it's going to be hard enough leaving her with DH for a few hours, even knowing he has plenty of EBM and loving arms to hold her . . . I'm going to be worrying all the while that she is missing her mama, and I will be missing her like crazy!

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