[bugmenot]

It seems like usually the dad wants it done, but I know someone and the mom wanted it done, but the dad didn't. Eventually, the dad won out. (I have reason to believe that the dad is circumcised, but didn't ask.)

So does anyone know any statistics on when the mom wants it done and the dad disagrees vs when the dad wants it done and the mom is protective?

 

[joandsarah77]

I don't know if there are any statists on that, I've never seen any.
Most times dad wants it done because he is cut and he knows no other way. To not cut his own son means acknowledging that what happened to him wasn't needed and most men choose not to look into it because that can bring up all kinds of buried unwanted feelings.
Sometimes intact fathers want it done because their experience was one of being made fun off in the US or like many they experienced incorrect care growing up and now have a few issues from that, not realizing that their issues are normal and are treatable. Sometimes they assume its genetic because brothers may have the same issues (due to the same faulty care)
I think an intact father who has never had issues would be highly unlikely to want his sons to be circumcised.



Women in the US on the other hand, are simply used to seeing cut so the other is the unknown and often by extension thought of as gross. This may also be due to the belief in the myths that are so prevalent across the country. They may fall back to letting their DH decide-which if he is cut he often has no more idea than she does.

Both parents frequently buy into the myths and rhetoric of it's cleaner, better and never really look into it. In the US given it's seen as normal so this would be the easy road to take.



Whoever wants cosmetic surgery done should defer to the parent who doesn't, as the default position. Medical reasons are different, but RIC is not a medical treatment.

 

[hakunangovi]

I have never seen a statistic on this and I doubt that one exists. The only scenario that I can come up with where someone might keep track would be a person who teaches prenatal classes and makes notes when discussing circumcision.

It would be interesting to know, especially if reasons were included.

 

[Sustainer]

I don't have actual statistics, but in my experience, most of the time it's the father who wants it done. Unfortunately, the mother often thinks "this is a male area, so it should be his decision." As mothers, I believe it is our duty to protect our children at all costs. The worst person to make this decision is a circumcised male who's so determined to convince himself that he has the best possible form of genitalia himself, that he has a psychological need to ensure that his son is cut along the same pattern.

 

[hakunangovi]

I don't have actual statistics, but in my experience, most of the time it's the father who wants it done. Unfortunately, the mother often thinks "this is a male area, so it should be his decision." As mothers, I believe it is our duty to protect our children at all costs. The worst person to make this decision is a circumcised male who's so determined to convince himself that he has the best possible form of genitalia himself, that he has a psychological need to ensure that his son is cut along the same pattern.

This is so true ! Most circumcised men never delve into the details of circumcision and, therefore, have no clue what they lost when their foreskin was amputated. As you say, they need to believe that the package they have is the best out there. Having said that, I do know three men who are angry and distressed that they were subjected to this very damaging surgery, and did not allow their sons to be subjected to it.