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Hey, everybody. I'm just curious about your birth plans. My daughter (my first) was born in the hospital, and it wasn't a great experience. My sons were born at home and those were just wonderful. However, circumstances have changed considerably, and I'm now living in an apartment with my kiddos, and not the house we used to be in when I was married. In addition, my partner lives two hours away. I don't feel comfortable having a home birth in my apartment, and financial circumstances are such that it looks like this is going to be another hospital birth.<br><br>
I'm having a hard time accepting that I'll be giving birth in the hospital after two lovely home births. I'm also worried that it will be like my daughter's birth. I know so much more now than I did then, and my practice is comprised mainly of nurse midwives. There's really no reason to believe it won't be different. Still, I can't help how I feel. I hope hearing about your plans and having a place to discuss it will help me find a way to be at peace with the idea.<br><br>
Thanks for letting me vent a bit!
 

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<p>I'm planning a 4th home birth.<br><br>
Are there any freestanding birth centers in your area that might work?  I know lots of people that still home birth in an apartment.  Our first homebirth was in a condo at 8 o clock in the morning and the windows were open in spring.  Still....weirdly, no one knew a thing!  I was shocked when the attached neighbors told me that hadn't even heard anything!  Cause I was pushing for an hour and a half!</p>
 

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<p>I'm giving birth in a birth center. They have their own separate building "house" that is across the street from the hospital. I will deliver with midwives but they do conference with an OB who is made aware of all progress. It's sort-of in between a home birth and a hospital birth. If there are any risks or there are complications they transfer you to the hospital however the midwife will go with you.</p>
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<p><a href="http://www.beverlyhospital.org/locations--services/health-services/maternity,-obstetrics/north-shore-birth-center" target="_blank">http://www.beverlyhospital.org/locations--services/health-services/maternity,-obstetrics/north-shore-birth-center</a></p>
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<p>The North Shore Birth Center is our "home-like" Birth Center and is one of the childbirth options offered by Beverly Hospital. It is a midwifery practice, in collaboration with OB/GYN physicians, situated on the campus of Beverly Hospital. </p>
<p>The North Shore Birth Center is tailored to women who are low-risk and prefer a natural approach to pregnancy and childbirth.  The Birth Center's certified nurse-midwives attend births at both the Birth Center and Beverly Hospital.  Giving birth at the North Shore Birth Center means no routine procedures.  Labor progresses naturally with holistic approaches used for pain management.  Services such as water births are also offered.  One of the attractions of birthing at the North Shore Birth Center is the ownership of space.  The Birth Center actually becomes the family's home while the mother labors.  Family members have full access to the kitchen, living room, outdoor garden and deck.  The space is quiet and peaceful. Families can bring and cook their own food. </p>
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<p>Not all hospitals are the same if you are going for a hospital-birth look around...and see if you can get into a practice with midwives at least.</p>
 

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<p>90%  homebirth 10% birth centre birth. </p>
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<p>My first was a hospital birth, not by choice, but due t lack of midwives. They -can- be satisfying births, even though I know it's not what you want. You're such a more experienced mama and birther this time around. Decide what you want, and accept no less. You can do this mama *hugs*</p>
 
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Thanks, ladies. I just don't feel comfortable giving birth here. I thought about it quite a bit, and I worry I'd be self conscious during labor. I'm not exactly the quiet type. <img alt="wink1.gif" class="bbcode_smiley" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/wink1.gif"> I looked into birth centers, too, but I just can't afford it. My midwives actually have a birthing center inside their facility but it's waaaaay out of the realm of possibility financially. I really wish I felt comfortable having the baby at home, but I just don't see how I could. My neighbors are constantly complaining about the noise my kids make as it is.<br><br>
I guess I've got time to be okay with things. I just know how I am during labor, and how I like my environment to be, and I feel accomplishing that in a hospital will be a challenge. I think I'll look into hiring a doula this time around.
 

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<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Mozado8210</strong> <a href="/community/t/1394706/where-will-you-give-birth#post_17532011"><img alt="View Post" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br><br>
Thanks, ladies. I just don't feel comfortable giving birth here. I thought about it quite a bit, and I worry I'd be self conscious during labor. I'm not exactly the quiet type. <img alt="wink1.gif" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/wink1.gif"> I looked into birth centers, too, but I just can't afford it. My midwives actually have a birthing center inside their facility but it's waaaaay out of the realm of possibility financially. I really wish I felt comfortable having the baby at home, but I just don't see how I could. My neighbors are constantly complaining about the noise my kids make as it is.<br><br>
I guess I've got time to be okay with things. I just know how I am during labor, and how I like my environment to be, and I feel accomplishing that in a hospital will be a challenge. I think I'll look into hiring a doula this time around.</div>
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That's a bummer that the birth center is not covered by insurance :( Mine bills through the hospital as they are considered part of the hospital (although they did have to campaign to keep it that way!)</p>
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<p>I think Doula is a great idea! Also can you look at different hospitals?</p>
 

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<p>I'm waiting for my requested copy of Ina May's Guide to Childbirth from my library, and I'm planning to read it with an open-mind, but really I've never given much thought to having a baby anywhere besides a hospital. Both of my kids were born in a hospital and I was overall pretty satisfied with the experience both times. There were minor issues during both deliveries that a midwife would most likely be able to deal with during a homebirth (decreased heart rate and no time for group strep B medication), but I was glad to be surrounded by hundreds of people who supposedly knew what they were doing if there was a major problem. I have a lot of respect and admiration for anyone confident enough to have a homebirth, because I think it would be a wonderful, memorable, experience, I just don't think I could do it.</p>
 

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Discussion Starter #8
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<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Activia</strong> <a href="/community/t/1394706/where-will-you-give-birth#post_17532018"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif"></a><br><br><br>
That's a bummer that the birth center is not covered by insurance <img alt="greensad.gif" class="bbcode_smiley" src="http://files.mothering.com/images/smilies/greensad.gif"> Mine bills through the hospital as they are considered part of the hospital (although they did have to campaign to keep it that way!)<br><br>
I think Doula is a great idea! Also can you look at different hospitals?</div>
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Actually, this is a good hospital, and it's the one the midwives can deliver at. Really the issue is just me. I hope finding a good doula will help. I mostly just want someone there to help me advocate for myself. I'd rather my partner be able to focus on the birth with me.<br><br>
Also, research parent, I definitely know what you mean. I don't feel that way about hospitals, but I'm actually the only one among my friends who has had a home birth and my friends have all been satisfied with their hospital experiences, with the exception of one or two. I'm sure I'll be fine. I just want to go into it feeling confident and good about it, rather than sad about not giving birth at home or worried that I'm going to have a bad experience.
 

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<p>I totally understand what you mean. My first birth was a hospital disaster, and my second birth was a nearly perfect homebirth. I'm planning another homebirth because the thought of having to give birth in a hospital again is so scary. I think the most important thing no matter where you give birth is choosing your care provider wisely. As long as you've found someone you can communicate with and supports your wishes, you should be okay. I would definitely look into the hospitals policies on rooming-in (mine encouraged rooming in, but you couldn't be asleep with your baby in your room because they didn't want your baby to be stolen), and any other policies you're passionate about.</p>
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<p>Where you've had a couple of homebirths, you'll be able to tell the nurses with confidence that you know what labor is like, and they don't need to keep offering you pain meds. Hire a doula for sure! A student doula might be a good low cost option for you. And take some goodies for the nurses and let them know you've had a bad hospital experience, and you might be a little more sensitive than most patients. Hopefully they'll see you as the strong mother you are, instead of a pain in the ass.</p>
 

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<p>homebirth with a slim chance I will need to go to birth center if another mama in the practice is in labor also</p>
 

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<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Dandy Lion</strong> <a href="/community/t/1394706/where-will-you-give-birth#post_17532306"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif"></a><br><br>
I totally understand what you mean. My first birth was a hospital disaster, and my second birth was a nearly perfect homebirth. I'm planning another homebirth because the thought of having to give birth in a hospital again is so scary. I think the most important thing no matter where you give birth is choosing your care provider wisely. As long as you've found someone you can communicate with and supports your wishes, you should be okay. I would definitely look into the hospitals policies on rooming-in (mine encouraged rooming in, but you couldn't be asleep with your baby in your room because they didn't want your baby to be stolen), and any other policies you're passionate about.<br><br>
Where you've had a couple of homebirths, you'll be able to tell the nurses with confidence that you know what labor is like, and they don't need to keep offering you pain meds. Hire a doula for sure! A student doula might be a good low cost option for you. And take some goodies for the nurses and let them know you've had a bad hospital experience, and you might be a little more sensitive than most patients. Hopefully they'll see you as the strong mother you are, instead of a pain in the ass.</div>
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Thank you! Those are great suggestions.
 

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<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>Dandy Lion</strong> <a href="/community/t/1394706/where-will-you-give-birth#post_17532306"><img alt="View Post" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br>
 
<p>I would definitely look into the hospitals policies on rooming-in (mine encouraged rooming in, but you couldn't be asleep with your baby in your room because they didn't want your baby to be stolen), and any other policies you're passionate about.</p>
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<p>That's really interesting. Maybe it's because I live in "hippie" California, but I've been at two different hospitals with two different health care providers (Blue Cross/Blue Shield and Kaiser) and both hospitals had a global policy of not removing the baby from your sight the entire time you were there unless you requested the baby be removed (which they strongly discouraged in order to establish breastfeeding). They didn't actively promote this, but with my second child, I didn't use the in room bassinet and slept with her in the hospital bed next to me. I wasn't sure what they would say, but a few different nurses were in at different times and two of them made positive comments about our sleeping arrangement. The others just didn't say anything.</p>
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<p>I would definitely more strongly consider a homebirth if I lived in a place where they wouldn't let your baby stay with you all the time. I didn't even realize that was still going on today.</p>
 

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<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>researchparent</strong> <a href="/community/t/1394706/where-will-you-give-birth#post_17532466"><img alt="View Post" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style=""></a><br>
 
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<p>That's really interesting. Maybe it's because I live in "hippie" California, but I've been at two different hospitals with two different health care providers (Blue Cross/Blue Shield and Kaiser) and both hospitals had a global policy of not removing the baby from your sight the entire time you were there unless you requested the baby be removed (which they strongly discouraged in order to establish breastfeeding). They didn't actively promote this, but with my second child, I didn't use the in room bassinet and slept with her in the hospital bed next to me. I wasn't sure what they would say, but a few different nurses were in at different times and two of them made positive comments about our sleeping arrangement. The others just didn't say anything.</p>
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<p>I would definitely more strongly consider a homebirth if I lived in a place where they wouldn't let your baby stay with you all the time. I didn't even realize that was still going on today.</p>
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<p>I was totally shocked when I they told me. I asked during my tour specifically about rooming-in, and they said they encouraged it. I guess we had different definitions of what that was. My daughter was born colicky, so neither one of us slept the two nights we were in the hospital. I was in such bad shape I couldn't walk after the birth, and I was terrified of leaving the hospital because of that, but once I got home, I was so glad to be home. Me and my baby just curled up in bed together and slept, while my mom took care of everything else for a couple of days. Even though at the time I thought my doctor had saved me and my baby's lives after such a dangerous birth (turns out the danger was all caused by cytotec), I realized that if I ever had a baby again, I would surely get out of the hospital as soon as I possibly could.</p>
 

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<p>But on the other hand, my SIL just had a baby in a different hospital, and she loved her stay. Her first baby was stillborn, and the l&d nurses were all super sensitive to her needs. She loved her doctor, and her labor (induced, since she was having so much anxiety because of her previous stillbirth) was super easy for her, and she loved the experience. The nurses were always respectful of her, and didn't do anything to her baby without permission. The night after the birth they brought in a candlelight dinner for her and her husband. They were super friendly and supportive of breastfeeding. She was cleared to leave the hospital after her first night, but she opted to stay since she felt like she was being so taken care of. <span style="line-height:1.5em;">She went along with most of the mainstream policies, but it was still a good reminder to me that all moms can have good births, even hospital births, as long as they are working with people who know their goals and are supportive of them.</span></p>
 
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<p>My first two were born at home and my third was in a hospital with a CNM in the water. I avoided the hospital until transition so they wouldn't be able to mess with me too much. My midwife stayed with me the whole time and brought me food. It wasn't perfect but it was WAY better than I expected a hospital birth to be. This time, I'll be at a freestanding birth center that's covered by insurance. If it wasn't, I'd stick with the CNM group and hospital from last time.</p>
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<p>My sister had her first baby at a rural hospital in May and I was impressed by how it was handled (with a family practitioner). She was stuck at 8cm for 8 hours and she and her nurse and doula did lunges through the halls for hours and there wasn't any pressure to hurry things up. She'd been laboring on and off for 4 days before she even got there.</p>
 

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Our first was a homebirth in a one-bedroom, second floor apartment. The second was a homebirth in a house we owned at the time. We are currently planning our third homebirth in a house we are renting (our landlady had a homebirth of her own here 30+ years ago!) while doing co-care with an OB who is monitoring my blood clotting disorder. I am fortunate to have a homebirth-supportive OB who has a really good relationship with my midwife so that if circumstances do require a hospital birth or transfer after birth, I know I will be in good hands.
 

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<p>Hospital due to cost and DH (me a bit too). I'd love a homebirth but with insulin GD, not all mw will take me and DH doesn't want to do a payment plan for one. We will have a doula and use the Bradley Method. This is bean #3</p>
 

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Planning on a 2nd home birth with our wonderful midwife. I'm such a doctor/hospital phobe that I can't imagine I would progress well in the hospital. Haven't decided where in the house to give birth though- if I choose a water birth, the pool would have to be set up in the living/dining room in our part of the house (we share a house with my mom, but it has two separate living spaces.) Our bedroom is small and might be tight with the midwife, assistant, DH, and my girlfriends (2 or 3.)
 

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<p>At my last appointment the MW & I decided that we'll plan for both home & hospital, and decide later, even when labour begins. Much of it will depend on if this 3rd baby is breech/transverse. None of the MW in our practice (and it's the only practice locally) feel comfortable or experienced enough with breech delivery to attempt it, and if babe is transverse in labour I'll need to be transferred to an OB in hospital for an external version to flip baby. The MW can only do external versions before labour begins. Since both of my children were transverse at 38+weeks, I'm not counting on this one actually staying in a head down position anytime before the actual birth. DS started to turn at 38.5wks, and was born one day before 40wks, finished turning during labour. DD was a water-broken/leaking, external version, induction at at 38.5. Both of them moved from breech to transverse and back again several times after 35 weeks.<br>
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<p>With all that history likely to repeat, it's unlikely I'll be eligible for a homebirth anyway, but we're going to plan for both locations, and decide when we get closer.</p>
 
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