I feel like I'm playing the game "Where's Waldo", but my question is Where's AF?, it has been 13 weeks since my Katrina went to heaven...I am so hoping for AF, so I can feel "normal" and move on...I feel like I cant move on until I have myself back...we were told by our Dr not to TTC until six months have passed since DD was SB. I dont want to even start counting until I am back to normal, normal being when AF returns...I cant even remember when AF returned after our first, maybe after a birth, 3 months is not a long time...but with our first we were BF, but thats obviously not the case this time...I feel obsessive this time, feeling every twinge and checking every time I use the bathroom...once AF returns I feel like I should be safe...figuring my body is back to normal, so I can start tracking my cycles and best figure out the time to TTC, we want get pg as soon as possible, we are so desperate for another baby, to complete our family...i dont feel like i am overly stressed about the return of dear AF...but i want to make sure that my body is doing what its supposed to for a prescribed amount of time before i put it through the rigors of growing another baby...to give a little history, dd was sb at 37 1/2 weeks, basically full term...how long to wait before ttc, does that time include or start when AF returns...doc said the 6 months waiting time was for my stomach and back muscles to return to their full strength to support another pregnancy...did that mean that that AF should return shortly after the birth and that six months was the max time to wait thinking everything was normal...last time i saw dr and she did a full exam, she said everything looked "normal" and the twinges i had experienced at that point was ovulation and I looked like at that time that i was gonna start within 3-5 days, that was at least 3 weeks ago...my pap from that appt returned normal...so i dont know what to think right now...when Sept arrives do we start to TTC or should i have had AF for that whole time so thats what would have made it TTC...my huge concern here is that with the last outcome, I want to be absolutely sure that I am doing and have done everything possible to ensure the desired outcome this time...the reason i want AF to return and be normal prior to TTC is that we dont know what happened necessarily last time and want to start with a "clean slate" so to speak...if anyone can understand, I would love to hear...thank you for listening....
allykat (mama to Allyson on earth 9/18/98 Katrina in heaven 3/24/05
allykat (mama to Allyson on earth 9/18/98 Katrina in heaven 3/24/05