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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
...the sex of the baby? I don't want to this time (it wasn't an option last time since ds had a condition that basically only happens in boys) but everyone else is pushing to know. Hubby says he wants to find out so that he can "get over any dissappointment" he might have if it's not a girl. My mom wants to know so she can go shopping (and because she's nosy
).

I thought I wanted a girl this time too, but as the pregnancy progresses I'm realizing that Koa having a little brother would be great, too.

Anybody else on the fence or already decided not to find out?
 

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I would LOVE to find out the gender of the baby. But, DP and I were talking about it and he really really doesn't want to find out. He's pretty set on not knowing. I think that he was at the point of fighting about it. Hmm...
 

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On the fence here. DH really wanted to do the ultrasound, though I was on the fence on that for a while as well, but we finally decided together to go ahead and have one.

I told DH that if we find out the gender he has to let me buy all the yarn I want to knit for the baby
Maybe that will lower his desire to find out for the sake of our finances
 

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You know, I was always one of those people who SWORE I'd never find out the gender ahead of time. Even opted not to find out at the 20 wk u/s with DD. Then we had a 3D done & ended up finding out because, well, we just felt weird having seen the baby's face and all that detail but still not having a gender/name to put with it.

We will find out this time too. Mostly because I don't see the point after finding out last time.

I totally understand your desire not to know though!

Holly
 

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I would never want to know the 'gender' of my child before it was born and when I uc'ed my two youngest I did not look to see for about half an hour and then only cos my then partner was 'wanting to know'. It makes no difference to me at all. But thats just me. It must take out the element of surprise but would be handy for shopping but only if you are going to insist on 'gender-specific' clothing for new-borns. I was truly dreadful and knitted multi-coloured stripey hoody tops for my babies, black booties and tye-dye baby-grows, I'm getting all teary actually thinking on how gorgeous they were, in fact I am positively broody lol I never had ultrasound scans so I always forget most people choose to know the sex of their unborn child, maybe it's easier for some to know.
 

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Not finding out here.. We didn't with dd and we really liked finding out at the birth. I can understand why people find out early, but for us the wait was worth it!
 

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We won't be finding out. Well, not conventionally anyway. I *might* consult a psychic this time. Last time, I was sure my SON was a girl and this time, I dunno. My son thinks it is a sister, and my DH thinks it is another boy. I really don't know which I would prefer. Like the OP said, I kind of like the idea of DS having a brother, but I also like the idea of one of each...

I just love being the mother of a boy. It is great!


Anyhow, if I *did* get a scan, I would ask to know the sex. I am sure we won't have one, though.
 

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Not finding out. Love the surprise, and personally I enjoy bonding with the baby without projecting any expectations on "who" they will be. We do very low-tech pregnancies, but we ARE having a 20 wk US because of my prior C/S. Want to make sure that the placenta implanted in the right place - it will just make us feel more comfortable about our HBAC if we have that information. So last time we didn't find out because we didn't have the option (no US) AND wanted to be surprised, and this time we are choosing to keep it a surprise even though we COULD find out.
 

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I find this conversation interesting and I am also finding it interesting to read why everyone does or doesn't want to find out.

I'm not pregnant right now, but hope to be by year's end. Our DD was a surprise and since we had a girl, when we were pg. with DS, we chose to find out. Having done it both ways, I would say that I much prefer the element of surprise. DH wants to find out when we get pg again, but I am dead set against it. We don't have to worry about the shopping or gifts, because we've got clothes saved for both genders and gender neutral from birth on up. We also co-sleep for at least 6 months, so I also don't have to worry about co-ordinating the nursery to the gender either. I'm happy for the baby to be a surprise when we get pregnant again. To me, gender doesn't matter and I'll love the baby either gender.
 

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We didnt the last two times, but DH really wants to and since I got my way the last two times, I figure I'll give in this time. Partly because my DD is absolutely set on baby being a girl (named "Elemeno"
) and if its really a brother I want time to dissuade her!

I DO like that suprise at the birth, but figure I dont mind much this time and it will make DH happy. Since I dictate so much else we do pregnancy and birth-wise, I am happy to do this for him.
 

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nope. going very low tech here. no ultrasounds, no amnio, no finding out. just loving baby!
 

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We're not planning an u/s, so we obviously won't be finding out before the birth. If for some medical reason we needed an u/s, then we might find out then. We're pretty low-tech here, too. In fact, I think the only tests I've had done were a simple blood test and the glucose/protein urine strips with my midwife. We're not doing the AFP, amnio, u/s, etc. If I were older I might feel differently, but I feel pretty low-risk at 24.
 

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Not planning on finding out. We didn't with DS and it was such a nice thing to be surprised at the birth, though I was SHOCKED baby was a boy, was so convinced he was a girl all through the pregnancy. I must admit, though, that part of me wants to find out so I can start knitting in appropriate colors. But as fun as that would be, I'll most likely just use natural wool that I can dye later
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by storychick
Partly because my DD is absolutely set on baby being a girl (named "Elemeno"
) and if its really a brother I want time to dissuade her!

Good luck with that one! My cousin had her third last Feb. and her daughter was so set on having a sister that she cried in the u/s room when they found out that the baby had a penis
. Six months on she still calls him her "sissy" and they keep the scissors hidden from her, just in case she tries to take matter into her own hands...
 

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I really, REALLY want to find out (that it's a girl
) but I don't really want to have any ultrasounds during this pg
sooo...Probably not...
 

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I love surprises and have some semblance of patience...we both want to wait. Not to negate that it is a surprise at the ultrasound, but I like the idea of waiting until birth.

In fact I am so good at waiting that I just told my parents last week (at 13 weeks!) because I wanted to see their faces!
Before I told them it was hard listening to my mother raffle off her newest recipes to me over the phone and acting like I was excited...when I really wanted to vomit!

I haven't even told my cuz yet because I am going to see her next month and I want to see her face when she sees my belly...same with her mom, my fav aunt who is coming to visit in Sept...I am a sucker for that stuff!!!!

I am so bad that I have been known to go to the airport with a friend who was picking someone up so I could watch reunions at arrivals...and I cry sometimes with parents when they hear their baby's heart beat for the first time. And now, with even more hormones...forget about it!!!

, Paige
 

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Nope, we won't find out. On baby #5 and we've never found out for any of them. While I hate surprises, I love that first moment after birth when you realize what sex baby you had.
 

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We were on the fence with DD but then my cousin pointed out that it's one of the last great surprises in life. Most surprises seem to be negative (bad medical situation, etc.) She had twins and didn't find out and I figure if she can wait, so can I. Now after having the fun of hearing the doc announce if the baby is a boy or a girl at teh birth, we definitely don't want to find out this time. I was so sure that we were having a girl with my last one that I would have been so shocked if we had a boy. This time I'm not so sure so it will be interesting.


My MIL wants to know, but I told her she'll just have to wait also. We have plenty of gender neutral sleepers from DD for teh beginning and since this one will be born at the same time of year, I think we'll be fine for that.
 

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We didn't find out with our daughter, and won't find out this time, either.

I don't want to start assigning roles or expectations to this child before they are even born, which I think is easier if I avoid knowing the sex, thinking about the child by name, etc.
 

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Nope, not finding out by default. I'm going for a low tech pregnancy, too. It'll be a great surprise! Plus I love green on babies
 
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