[namistenicole]

I'm 22 weeks now, and starting to think more about the actual birth (not just all the fun stuff to buy and house cleaning I need to do). I also recently recieved my Hypnobabies course and am reading through the information. I want my DH to be my birth partner, but I wonder if the amount of reading and practicing involved with Hypnobabies might be too much for him. He was a wonderful birth partner during DS's birth, but he gets a little anxious and squeemish.

So, who is your birth partner? If it's your DP, how gung ho are they about the classes, practicing, and etc? Or are you hiring a doula?

I also have 2 midwives, so I don't know it seems like hiring a doula is overkill, but I'd love to know what the rest of you are planning.

 

[superlori]

I'm re-hiring my previous midwife this time sort of as a doula, and then I'll have my husband too. I'll be using community midwives, but I wanted my private midwife again, since she knows me and my preferences and will be a perfect partner. Dh will be good too, in a comforting way, and she'll be good on the medical side.

 

[applecider]

DP will be my labor support. He was with DS and it worked out fine. Honestly, I didn't want anyone touching me or talking to me during labor but if I needed something done (like move the rocking chair) he would do it. He's quiet and doesn't do anything I don't ask for. Perfect for me.

I'm a little conflicted this time because last time we did take a childbirth class, nothing special, but this time I hadn't really planned anything. I wonder if I need to? I haven't read any books or practiced any techniques and I wonder if it's necessary to do so with your second. I guess labors can be very different so I suppose I should be prepared for other types of pain.

I do plan on making DP a list of tasks to accomplish when I go into labor, ie. filling up the birth tub, turning the phone off, cleaning up, getting supplies ready, etc. Other than, I'm a sort of "fly by the seat of my pants girl" so I'll just take things as they come! (anyone know what movie that quote came from?

)

 

[namistenicole]

Quote:

Originally Posted by cody'smomma I do plan on making DP a list of tasks to accomplish when I go into labor, ie. filling up the birth tub, turning the phone off, cleaning up, getting supplies ready, etc. Other than, I'm a sort of "fly by the seat of my pants girl" so I'll just take things as they come! (anyone know what movie that quote came from? )

That's a good idea.

Pretty Woman!

 

[dolcedaze]

No one!

My husband missed my daughter's birth and may miss this one. I'd like him to be able to witness it for his own sake, but I know it makes no difference to the baby either way, and if he tried to be a "birth partner", telling me when to breathe, move, or anything like that, I think I'd throw him out the window.

I do have a fellow homebirthing friend coming this time to hang out with my two year old, and wonderful midwives who I trust completely, and then, hopefully DH, but that's it, and no one there will be in a coaching type role.. that's all me!

 

[Swandira]

My husband does fetch-and-carry tasks during my labors, and will entertain the kids until my childcare person gets here, and will also let me lean on him physically as much as I need to (I like standing laboring for the first several cm). I also have a doula, who will be there to offer solutions to whatever problems I might encounter in getting comfortable. Also, I may have her give me the hypnobabies cues. That way my husband will be more available to move things around as needed. I can take women more seriously while I'm in labor.

Nealy
mama to T, 5; L, 2; and EDD 12/20/08

 

[KindRedSpirit]

Dh is a great birth partner -I keep telling him he should be a midwife!It's the only time he is really attentive and in tune and on the ball.Normally he has no attention span or memory retention of what I just said...So I LOVE having him be my birth partner!We did have really good training(Bradley) with our first pregnancy, and we were VERY young and got married when I was 3 mo. preg, so he was in shock and let me call all the shots!

He was also working nights at the time and came to EVERY prenatal!Since then, we just go with our flow.We know our birthing groove, and we've had the same mw every time, so it's great!No wonder I'm such a birth junkie!

 

[jenniferadurham]

I am delivering at a birthing center, and my DH will be my birthing partner. He is ALL about doing everything, classes, shopping, decorating. This is his first and he can't wait.

 

[leavemealone]

Well, DH will be at the birth, but I am also hiring the same doula that I hired for my second child. Judging from my last two births, DH gets on my nerves during labor and I want someone else there so that we can both take a break from each other. If it happens like last time where I need to make a decision of whether to wake up DH or call my doula in the middle of the night, I'll call my doula and let DH sleep this time around.

DH is also not fully thrilled with me having a homebirth, so the doula will be there to help calm him as well. Her presence was very reassuring to him during my last birth and hopefully will be during this birth s well. I am also doing Hypnobabies this time around. I sort of think it's going a bit overboard to have both a doula and do Hypnobabies, but I'm going to anyway. DH will be responsible for certain things so he won't be standing around doing nothing, but we also have two other kids that he can spend time with while I labor.

 

[Starfish11]

DH is my birthing partner

He's a natural coach (coaches soccer even) and I think will be great.

 

[Funny Face]

I'm in the same boat as you about the hypnobabies. Dh just doesn't have the interest or commitment to read me the scripts like he is suppose to or read and listen to the other material. I don't know what I'm going to do.

I'm counting on my mw being my doua/support person but don't expect her to put in time with all the hypnobabies stuff.

I was thinking of trying to find a recorder and record the scripts for myself and then listen to them.

I'm not sure what to do... I guess I'm my own birth partner!

 

[allaiter]

I will have a house full of people to chose from. There will be my Midwife and her apprentice who happens to be a Doula friend of mine. An other Doula friend of mine and then an other friend who will have just finshed the doula traning and will use my birth towards certification, my DH will be here, my sister is flying down from AK and my kids. I do not know if my sister that lives in this metro will be here or not. This is the first birth my mom will miss, she comes 7 days after I am due. My midwife thinks babe and I might just wait for her then she would be here too.
I know it seems like a lot of people but this is my first home brith, no epidural, no hospital birth, I will have a lot of support and there is space for people to hang out in if it is all to much for me. My biggest worry is what if my son (he is very protective of me and i do not know if this will be too much for him) wants to leave and go to his dads house (my ex)? With my sister and a friend here they can take him if they need to. And of course.. god fordbid if anything bad should happen and I need to be transported there will be some one here to be with the kids, I will not need to worry about them.

 

[grace's voice]

DH wasn't the greatest support during my last birth. I was freaking out and he did nothing to "ground" me, I really need someone in my face the entire time, experiencing it with me, as my ex did with my 1st baby. That said, DH knows enough about birth that I'd almost trust him as my mw and he did catch ds.

Our neighbor, who is a good friend, is acting as our doula, childcare, and photographer. I'm a little nervous about all that on her when really I just want her to be there for me and let DH watch and catch. Maybe HE can be the childcare?

I just got the hypnobabies home study course today. I've done Bradley in the past but with DHs school schedule there's absolutly no time for him to prepare with me. I was hoping hypnobabies would be more about just me... which I'm assuming from your post isn't so much so.

Anyway, I'm feeling really alone. DH has already said in no uncertain terms he won't be able to prepare with me. I've hired doulas for my past births, which went great the 1st time, but with the last 1 she didn't even arrive until about an hour after the birth. I go fast.

 

[grace's voice]

Quote:

Originally Posted by moodyred01 I'm in the same boat as you about the hypnobabies. Dh just doesn't have the interest or commitment to read me the scripts like he is suppose to or read and listen to the other material. I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm counting on my mw being my doua/support person but don't expect her to put in time with all the hypnobabies stuff. I was thinking of trying to find a recorder and record the scripts for myself and then listen to them. I'm not sure what to do... I guess I'm my own birth partner!

Looks like you and I are in the same boat, once more! We should just move in together and coach each other!

 

[A Mothers Love]

just DH & me.
Like I said before...I don't want anyone to touch me, talk to me. or even look at me!

 

[applecider]

Quote:

Originally Posted by A Mothers Love just DH & me. Like I said before...I don't want anyone to touch me, talk to me. or even look at me!

Me too!

I can just envision the tattling now, "He's touching at me! Stop looking at me!"

 

[Lemon Juice]

Dp is suppose to be mine. He's not down with having a homebirth tho...so I told him to just watch/entertain the kids. I think i'd rather have him do that (we have a 2, 4, 5, 6 yr old) while I labor myself and what not. I don't need any of his negative vibes infecting me, kwim? He also was snarky and said "who's gonna watch the kids if we have a homebirth? they're gonna bother you here!" And I said..."uh...who's gonna watch the kids at the hospital???!!! Duh!

" Our family (well his family) is 1.5 hours away and doubt they'll come down to help anyway...plus they work and who knows when babe will arrive. We were better off when we were surrounded by friends who helped w/ our last birth then here...w/ family who won't help and no friends at all. Geez.

At this point we don't have a MW b/c our state sucks and we just can't afford one out of state for 3300 dollars! I may do UC and catch babe myself. A mamas gotta do what a mamas gotta do!

 

[MujerMamaMismo]

I'm birthing in a birth centre and will have DP and a doula as well as the BC midwives. While labouring at home, my TCM friend is gonna hang out with us too and give me acupuncture as necessary.

 

[grace's voice]

So relieved!

I told dh last night that hypnobabies is more partner involved than I'd expected and that I'm screwed and don't know what to do. And he said in the most loving way, "We'll work on it together every night, don't worry." I BAWLED like a baby. This is huge, if you've come across my "Relationship Struggles" thread YKWIM.

Now, here's hoping I go into labor while he's actually here, which he won't be much during that time because of finals. Or at least hope he's somewhere in the school where his phone gets reception... and that my labor takes longer than it takes him to get home!

 

[UrbanMomma]

No one really. I kinda like to fly solo. DP will be there, along with my MW's and my mom.