[MelKnee]

The Rosie O'Donnell thing got me thinking. Why is it always exclusive BFing or exclusive formula? Why can't there be a combo of the two? Why can't partners who can't bond any other way than by feeding a bottle to a baby use expressed BM? Why doesn't anyone who insists on bonding with a baby with a bottle between them ever think of what's best for the baby?

 

[Finch]

No clue. I guess because people automatically think bottle=formula, or maybe they think pumping is "too difficult" or "gross" or whatever.

 

[Changed]

I don't know. I think introducing a bottle encourages early weaning but since most people wean WAY early anyway...

I hate that people use FF as an excuse to bond. What is so bonding about feeding a baby? How about every other aspect of baby care?

 

[edamommy]

Why would one only be able to bond by FEEDING the baby? Isn't that very idea dysfunctional?

I hated pumping. So, that's why (for us) we never used a bottle. Plus, my ds would have not stood for a bottle anyway! lol.

 

[amygeekgrl]

i totally don't get it either. my dh never fed our dd bottles (i didn't pump) and yet they got PLENTY of bonding time and have a great relationship.

 

[Gidget]

I always considered the bonding issue a tricky subject. You get a ff'er who says bf is not the only way to bond yet they say that they ff so daddy can bond with baby. Huh?

 

[Faerieshadow]

I don't understand it either. I have suffered from supply issues and have had to supplement for most of our breastfeeding relationship, despite using every trick known to woman to boost my supply. I can't imagine having just given up altogether - my son would lose out on so much!

 

[Gidget]

Oh, welcome Amy. Ginger here. From your blog.

 

[UrbanPlanter]

I think, in Rosie's case, she didn't want her Partner to be able to do anything with the baby that she, herself, could not do. Ergo, nothing. No compromise to be had.

 

[Gidget]

I agree with UrbanPlanter. I think I stated in another thread here that it is probably jealousy on her part. You know, she was not able to (though many adoptive mothers do and can) bf her kids so why should this baby get to and why should her wife get to do something she didnt get to do? Like someone said in another thread also, since women are conditioned to be maternal and nurturing, Rosie did not feel like her partner should be "more" of a mother than she is. Very sad and selfish.

Both her comment and her backpedaling made her look really stupid.

 

[elicatanna]

I'm the perfect person to dispell the feeding=bonding argument. My first 2 dd's were formula fed (wish I had known then what I know now about bf'ing difficulties, but anyways), and my 3rd dd is breastfed (she's almost 2). My dh is as closely bonded to our older dd's (who he was able to bottlefeed) as he is to our youngest who has never had a bottle...ever. There are so many other ways to bond with your children. Putting an artificial nipple in their mouths is not the only way, nor is it even close to being one of the best ways to bond.

 

[mom2tig99Nroo03]

<nodding>

 

[Rainbow]

And you know, even if a mom did find it to hard to pump... why does that mean BFing has to end completely? I know one mom whose baby gets formula at day care and breast at home and on weekends. Any little bit is better than none.

 

[Victorian]

you know my dh did say something about this a while back. Our dd was ff and our ds is bf. When dh spent time alone with dd he could soothe her by using a bottle and it was easy to do. but with ds he couldn't do that and so he had to find more *active* ways of bonding (i.e. playing peek-a-boo). It was also harder to soothe him.

Now ds was supplemented because of low-milk-supply but we made the decision that I would give him bottles just like we were nursing so he rarely gave him one unless I was gone for several hours.

V.

p.s.

 

[amygeekgrl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gidget Oh, welcome Amy. Ginger here. From your blog.

thank you.

i decided to come out of lurk mode and am glad i did.

 

[orangebird]

I don't know. I love breastfeeding, but honestly don't get any enjoyment out of bottle feeding. I have given my own kids bottles a few times and I didn't enjoy it, just wanted them to be done with it. I wanted to have at least a hand free, that drove me crazy. And when I feed other babies I don't feel anything special. I love nursing though. Maybe some people feel good while bottle feeding, I don't. I don't know why either. Cuddling and sleeping with my baby is way more bonding than bottle feeding it.

 

[my2girlsmama]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gidget I agree with UrbanPlanter. I think I stated in another thread here that it is probably jealousy on her part. You know, she was not able to (though many adoptive mothers do and can) bf her kids so why should this baby get to and why should her wife get to do something she didnt get to do? Like someone said in another thread also, since women are conditioned to be maternal and nurturing, Rosie did not feel like her partner should be "more" of a mother than she is. Very sad and selfish. Both her comment and her backpedaling made her look really stupid.

:

 

[Book Addict Jen]

Quote:

Originally Posted by edamommy Why would one only be able to bond by FEEDING the baby? Isn't that very idea dysfunctional?

I didn't bond with my husband by feeding him...

 

[UrbanPlanter]

I don't even feed my husband :LOL

 

[soccerchic21]

Quote:

Originally Posted by edamommy Why would one only be able to bond by FEEDING the baby?

exactly!!!

My husband bonded and still does bond with my daughter in so many other ways than feeding her.

Hello skin to skin people! He tried to cuddle with her as much as he could. Then he would give her baths....right now she is almost 2 that is one of the great times they have together is bath time she loves it.