[BetsyPage]

I have read it so many times here, and am finding it to be true myself, that nursing frequency increases in the middle of the second year, that it can be a very intense period of nursing. I'm curious about why? I assume that there is a developmental reason for this?<br><br>
And what about toddlers who have already weaned or were ff? Is there anything comparable that happens for them? Do they get more clingy or drink more milk?<br><br>
I'd love to hear personal opionions or see some links, etc. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> I have a background in developmental psych but never read anything related to extended nursing & development in the second year, though it's probably there somewhere... ahhh, the things I'd want to study if I was still in grad school now that I actually know something <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/wink1.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="wink1">

 

[guerrillamama]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/lurk.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="lurk">:

 

[BetsyPage]

You tease! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngtongue.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Stick Out Tongue"> I came & looked all excited someone had an answer to my burning question! :LOL

 

[guerrillamama]

<img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/winky.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="Wink"><br><br><br><img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/moon.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="moon">

 

[babyluvr]

nothing very scientific, but at our church the classes for little ones are divided so that 1's to almost 2's are together and that is the consistently the most challenging in terms of separation anxiety/clinginess, more than the ones younger than that. it's so sad to me to see parents leaving their kids while they are sad, I don't volunteer in there, I help with other ages. but I definitely see that most kids around the middle of the second year, regardless of parenting style, are going through the clinginess. those who don't have access to the breast anymore (pretty much all the ones at our church, except my little guy) often have sippy cup or blankie or pacifier they won't let go of, that I could see being translated into a breast if that was an option.<br><br>
maybe someone else has a more scientific explanation. i know i have read about how as the toddler becomes more independent she likes the freedom to move but also needs increasing reassurance for this new thing.

 

[DaryLLL]

I think they are working on independence issues which make them need Mommy more. Plus, they are cutting molars. Plus, now they know Mommy is a different person, and they love her. And they like to keep checking. One booby. Two boobies. One booby. Two boobies.<br><br>
You know what? I doubt anyone has ever studied the bfing habits of 1 yos b/c sadly so few people are still bfing at that age...

 

[famousmockngbrd]

My DS was definitely clingier - I don't remember if he ate more or not. (He was weaned.) He probably did - I think they go through a growth spurt physically at this age. Merntally, I think they are working on the concept of themselves as a person separate from other people, especially Mama, and while it's necessary for them to make this leap and they are driven to do so, it's kind of scary for them and they need lots of reassurance that just because you are a separate person, that doesn't mean you will disappear when you are out of their sight! So there's a certain amount of tension going on, opposing pulls, and they need help from us in sorting that out. I think it's really, really important to be there for them as much as they need you to be during this age, in order to support their developing sense of independence and still give them the security they still crave, to let them know that it's OK to be their own person! I feel like if they are denied this, it can have serious consequences later on.

 

[pawprint]

I also have nothing scientific, but I have come to believe that during times of great developmental leaps they start to nurse like little madmen. Now that little DS is nursing a dozen or more times a day again I am hoping the little monkey will start talking soon. It would certainly make life easier!

 

[BetsyPage]

Thanks for the replies- makes sense for me! If I ever go back and finish my PhD (probably won't though, lol, too late now!) I think I would be really interested to study the interaction of nursing habits and socio-emotional development... any findings would probably pretty much confirm what y'all just said, but it is always helpful to have papers to cite, another reason why extended nursing is beneficial, etc. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile"> Oh, and growth spurts still, definitely- my dd had a nurse-a-thon last weekend, and I think she grew an inch and grew out of her shoes! :LOL<br><br>
It was so sad... today we were working in the church nursery (even though we don't leave our dd there, but anyway) and this 20 month old boy really really didn't want his mom to leave, and he was so sad and angry at one point he SPIT his pacifier half-way across the room... we ended up paging his mom and she didn't make him stay, thank goodness... when she left the first time she had to shake him off her leg as she left the room then he ran to the door right after she closed it and body-slammed it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> He basically always has his paci, and I imagine if he was still nursing he would be quite an avid little nursling now.

 

[heldt123]

Well, we didn't have this issue as my son self weaned around 18 months, but I would agree with the separation anxiety issue. Somewhere in that age range it seems that they get a fear of separation and a need for mom--just my experience, although my son didn't go through that until around 2 and lasting until about 21/2. I would guess if he was still nursing he would have nursed more as he became extremely clingy to Mommy during that time. I avoided going to church and any other thing that we would have to be separated for. He finally decided one day that he could be without Mommy for a while and now will happily go with someone else and play happily--I'm glad we didn't push it too much. The only other thing I could think of is growth spurt...

 

[ggma]

I've just been browsing links here because ds at 16 months has been nursing more and more frequently... day, night... and I needed to a little reinforcement for trusting myself as well as my wee one. I work with routine for some things but really feel that he knows what he needs when it comes to nursing and cuddles. So. Teeth? two molars recently through and I'm thinking another is on the way. Also very much more aware of me in a new way... and I think he is enjoying the hanging tight time in a new way because of it? Just seems like he is really savoring the closeness as well as my awesome cooking <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/orngbiggrin.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="orange big grin">

 

[karlin]

My ds is 18 months, and boy is he a nursing maniac right now. He's just learned to talk (he's picked up at least 30 words in a little over a week), so I think that's part of it....but he also has a seperation issue as well. Sleeping has been horrific. He's never been a "good sleeper", but he's been waking tons more and not going back to sleep. I feel like pulling away from him lately, but I know he needs just the opposite. I SAH, so it's not a huge issue, but I do watch a couple other kids a few times a week, and he hates it. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> I'm glad to know this doesn't last forever.

 

[sagira]

Whew.. I'm not the only one.. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/love.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="love"><br><br><br>
Ds is 18 mos. and nursing all the time, also at night.<br><br>
Cheers,

 

[aniT]

<div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">And they like to keep checking. One booby. Two boobies. One booby. Two boobies.</td>
</tr></table></div>
Is this why we go back and forth and pinch the nipple we are not using?<br><br>
Dd is only 14 months but she has been eating less and nursing more the last couple weeks. She also spent last weekend (a week and a half ago) sick and did nothing but nurse all weekend. I think that might be part of it. At least now I know if she steps up her nursing it is normal.<br><br>
Question for the momma's who's babies are nursing more: Are they eating less solids or has this stayed about the same? Thanks!!

 

[babyluvr]

I posted earlier and ds i thought had btdt, but now he is a more avid nurser than those other three months it seems! and his food intake is waaaaay down. I do a combo of just going with it and setting boundaries, depending on the mood and the reason. he definitly needs some long and frequent sessions now.

 

[ggma]

Re: solid foods - random, random, random. At least, according to me! I just keep offering it to him. Ds created his own sign for nurse - he rubs both hands on his chest and it is so cute... Now when he comes up and asks for this during the day I ask him if he would like a snack. Sometimes he lights up at the word o's or cheese or he'll go over to the counter and point at something. But most of the time he furthers his desire by saying "urse" and going over and patting the couch. I go with it. When it comes to meals, he has just been given complete control over his bowl and spoon, soooooo, sometimes he gets a wee bit distracted. However, he has never been like some of my other friends babes who are really focused on eating. I'm still trying out new concoctions in hopes of finding the things that he really likes. Good luck all! And may sleep be with you...

 

[Castle]

I'm so glad to see this thread. In the past week and a half my 21 month old DD has become what I call a nursing monster. All day, all night, wants to nurse and is extremely clingy. I can barely take a step away from her without her crying to nurse. I was getting really frustrated with it, but reading that it's developmentally normal makes me feel much better about it.<br><br><div style="margin:20px;margin-top:5px;">
<div class="smallfont" style="margin-bottom:2px;">Quote:</div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="6" cellspacing="0" width="99%"><tr><td class="alt2" style="border:1px inset;">And they like to keep checking. One booby. Two boobies. One booby. Two boobies.</td>
</tr></table></div>
:LOL I love this. DD will nurse on one side for about 30 seconds, pull off, smile and say "Switch!" I put her on the other side, and she does the same thing!

 

[streetkitty]

I am SO glad this thread started. I remember hearing about an 18 month or so "back to infancy" stage. Being 4 months pregnant with a nursing, co-sleeping 19 month old, I started to get a bit freaked out to as how I will ever do it (and sleep myself!). I was starting to get really annoyed with the recent boob switch that dd wants to do every 10 seconds. Usually she is appeased with a firm "no" but I never used to switch sides at a feeding/comfort session but all of a sudden- she wants both all the time. And since she cannot nurse both at the same time- she wants to claim the other with her hand which I just cannot deal with. I feel like my body has been taken over by a tiny alien and a toddler that needs to be latched on 24/7!<br><br>
But hey- at least I'm not the only one!

 

[kroonkles]

I'm glad I stumbled across this thread. DS has also been nursing like a newborn for the past month or 2. I had just gotten back AF and it hadn't come back. Thought that was the reason. Nope, I'm pregnant. Having a hard time dealing with all the bf while being pg. I am trying so hard to cut down and he needs it so badly. Talk about guilt. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/greensad.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="greensad"> He's also at the point where he asks for it. A little voice saying "sa-side" (other side). Anyway, glad to see that it's normal. Now trying to figure out what to do about it.

 

[graciemom]

I'm also in the same boat. Gracie is 18 months and has been nursing like crazy. I just feel badly for her b/c my supply has dropped so much due to her previous decrease in nursing. Just hoping my supply will increase soon. <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/smile.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="smile">