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Why won't he eat but he's hungry from 2am-7am?!

861 Views 3 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  shanetedissac
I'm going freaking nuts! The last three night ds refuses to eat but he's hungry from about 2am to 7am. He screams around the breast but won't take it. I've tried dropper feeding him, he won't swallow. I've tried the avent bottle we have, and so has my dh. He won't take it (hell he won't take the bottle at *all* now, which is NOT helping my sleep deprivation here). So one of us just has to sit up with him while he is fussy or alert or downright screaming blood murder. I have NO idea why he won't eat!

I also seriously have no idea how much longer I can go being woken up every hour or two to feed him (and it takes an hour to feed him)! He won't sleep anywhere but right up against me, and wiggles in his sleep, which keeps me from sleeping, and then wakes screaming to eat every hour or two. The times I do fall asleep dh starts snoring and wakes me.... I thought I could just sleep in the baby's room, but the futon isn't comfortable, and the couch doesn't work so well either (aside from the fact that ou shouldn't co-sleep on the couch...). That's one of the reasons we got the bottle. So Dh could occasionally take over one feeding so I could sleep a little bit... nope, now ds doesn't want it.

Arg! I'm going nuts! Everyone tells me "it'll get better" but who knows when? Some babies don't sleep better than this for *months*. I have no idea how I can last that long! And dh is useless, I can't even talk to him about it because all he says is "are you going to hurt the baby? It scares me for you to talk about this" and then he goes to bed!

Ok I just needed to vent some, sorry for the mixed bag post here.
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Lisa, it sounds like you're very tired AND the mom of a baby! He's only 5 weeks, right? And you've had a rocky start to breastfeeding, and so this must feel like one more awful thing. But it's NOT! He's just adjusting.

It's possible it's a dairy thing--my second son got very, very fussy at night--would only sleep attached to the nipple--on and off until we took him and me off dairy--within a week (he was 7 months old then) he was sleeping 5 hours straight. He was older than Orion then, but the pattern of fussiness had stretched back a long time.

Is he taking the breast fine during other times? Could the introduction of a bottle nipple be confusing him, so now he's just rejecting EVERYTHING at his most vulnerable time (2-7am is EVERYONE's nmost vulnerable time lol!)?

Have you considered a nurse-in in bed? 24 hours in bed, just you and Orion, with your dh waiting on you, to help you relax and to give him complete access, on demand?

I don't have much else for advice--just a recomendation that you get as much rest as possible whenever you can so you can handle these tough stretches. Let the dishes pile up, the laundry too--this is more important.


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I second trying to get rid of dairy. Orion sounds a lot like my ds was for the entire first 5 weeks of his life, he wouldn't sleep more than 1/2 hour at a time for 5 weeks straight. I could have written your post, right down to dh's lack of help and ds's refusal to take a bottle. Then I called a lactation consultant who determined that I had oversupply issues, we worked out how to deal with those and I took dairy out of my diet altogether (it was VERY hard for me but well worth it). Both helped enormously. Is there a LLL leader you can call in your area to help you figure it out? I know when you are that tired that research is impossible and getting an objective third party opinion is important.

If you can, try to tell dh exactly what you need him to do for you. Our problem was that I would complain (and cry) about being tired and what happened at night or day when he was working without saying "I need you to do...", so he didn't know what to do for us. It took a very good friend to come rescue me, tell me to get back into my own bed to sleep with our son and let/tell Dh to move if he had to. Tell him that you need him to help you do x. Sometimes when men don't have any baby experience, they really don't have any idea how to be helpful. You are postpartum right now (well duh, you say), so do not minimize your needs for the sake of dh and the baby. Make sure you are eating and drinking well (get Dh to make you sandwiches and snacks before he goes to work if he does during the day so you can just grab them out of the frige). Tell him what it is exactly that he can do to make your life better. Even if they are little things.

to you and Orion. Take care of yourself so that you can take care of your baby!

ETA: P.S. If you do take dairy out of your diet, I believe it takes 2-3 weeks to actually start seeing the results because that's how long it takes to get it completely out of your system
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And Lisa, the feelings that you are having about being so frustrated with your baby are normal. I think that a lot of us have had those moments when we wanted to do something drastic. This is a tough time, I understand. My first was much like yours (different issues) but needed to be attended to just as much. How long will it last? Can't answer that but the first three months are the most difficult. Get to bed as the others said, instruct your dh as to what you need and vent as much as you like.

Take care~
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